Cry it Out?? Need answers quick???

Question

My son is 8 months old and used to sleep in his swing, until about a week ago, and we have started trying to let him cry it out. He sleeps great at night, no problems, but his naps are awful. He goes down fine, but wakes up from his second, usually longer nap, within 30 minutes (instead of the usual 2 hours) crying. We have tried shhhhsing, patting, going in periodically, physically laying him back down, but nothing works. Yesterday I let him cry it out after waking, he cried on and off for about 40 minutes, and then went back to sleep for another 1 1/2 hours. Today, my mom, his nana is watching him while I work and she called and said he has been crying for almost an hour. My question is for those of you who used this method..how long did you let your child cry at one time? How many days/weeks did it take for your child to stop waking and crying for so long? Help, please I am very stressed! Please, do not post message discouring CIO because I am already stressed enough.

For the person who said you are missing the point, yes you are, he is too big for the swing and needs to learn to sleep in his bed. It is my fault for letting him sleep in his swing for this long, I know I am to blame for creating this habit, but it is too late to dwell on it now.

He is VERY stubborn about everything.

He also could be teething, but he already has 4 teeth. He started teething 4 months ago and he NEVER had this kind of trouble sleeping. He also sleeps through the night without any problem since he was about 7 weeks old.

Also, nana does keep him at my house, so he is sleeping in his crib where he sleeps at night.

Thanks everyone for all the advice and ideas...keep it coming. I am so at a loss for what to do.

Answer 1

My baby is six months. She's been "ferberized" (more or less) since roughly four months (she wasn't ready at ALL before that). We had to go to it since she was taking her naps in my arms, but just wasn't sleeping well all of a sudden. Same thing as you...sleeps great at night (7or730-630 or 7), but naps were awful.
I know the method says 5 minutes, then 10, then 15, etc. I didn't do that. My first time, Katie screamed for 40 minutes, but I went in every 5 minutes (for me, there was no sense in letting her get THAT worked up, which she would have past me checking every 5 minutes or so). The next time, it was about 25 minutes, and then she started going to sleep fairly quickly; usually within 15 minutes or so. I have heard it's not unusual for it to take up to a week. Right now, I go in after 3 minutes, and then 5 or 7 minutes, depending on how she's reacting (often, she's asleep after my first visit).
Katie usually only takes about 45 minute long naps (2 or 3 a day). It's just the way she is. And once she's awake from a nap, she won't go back to sleep at all, so, I've never tried to have her CIO AFTER a nap. I'm wondering if your son is just ready to give up the long afternoon nap or at least cut it down to a shorter one? If nothing else, you could see if he makes it up with an earlier bedtime. (Some days Katie only takes two naps, but goes to bed around 6 - it's not really set in stone with us -and she seems to be about ready to retire the third nap soon anyway) You didn't say how long he sleeps at night...I know that a LOT of babies will give up the second nap around nine months....it's possible it's coinciding with you letting him CIO.
Forget all the bru-ha-ha about CIO being cruel. If it's done correctly (regular visits to help soothe the baby w/o picking him up) and the baby is of an appropriate age (it can't be done before 3 months at the earliest, and many babies aren't ready until 6 months), it's very important and reassuring for a baby to learn to self-soothe. I know how stressful it is (I had to put myself out on our balcony the first day I tried it), but once it's done, both baby and mommy will be happier.

Answer 2

I had this problem with my son a few weeks ago. At bedtime it was perfect and naps were horrible, I thought teething was the problem but he actually had and ear infection.

An hour is too long to let him cry. Have you tried swaddling him before you lay him down I did this with my 3 year old untill she was 1. Or rocking him (since he liked his swing for so long) and when he's been sleeping for 10-15 minutes in your arms lay him down.

Answer 3

An hour is too long. He's probally not needing another nap like another stated. My kids were only taking one nap by that age, but it varies child to child. I don't believe in letting babies cry for more than 10 mins. It might be inconvenient, but take out the second nap and see how it goes. I also would never have my child nap in a swing unless I was right there next to them the entire time. A woman I know had her child Die in a high chair, she only walked away for a couple of minutes. Good Luck!

Answer 4

The summary of this whole paragraph would be: I liked this guy it didn't end well now I need to grieve. And, that's exactly what you should do. Watch sappy movies, eat ice cream and allow yourself the chance to get over him. Your friends seem to have the wrong attitude about this. When a relationship ends there definitely needs to be a grieving process or you will stuff it down deep inside and then maybe not get over him for a lot longer than usual. So, do your sappy love movies, give yourself a break, take a nice hot bath, read a few magazines (not about boys), and you'll be okay soon enough.

Answer 5

Children teeth for years off and on, wash hands real well and slip finger in his mouth and rub his gums, if he starts chewing on your finger he is teething, try some orajel on his gums, make sure you start from one side of his mouth and go to the other and are using enough, if he stops crying within say 10 min. of applying it that was his problem. Watch his mouth for swelling gums that will give you a clew as to where to put orajel in the future.

Another thing might be gas, they have this wonderful stuff out for baby's that works wonderful you can get it at Wall Mart give required dose wait required amount of time see if that helps. Have had grandchildren it helped immensely.

I myself having raised 6 think crying for any longer than 10 min means something is wrong and it is up to us as parents to try to figure it out, even as hard as it may be sometimes when you have a crying baby, it gets easier when they can talk and tell us what is wrong. Best wishes Hun.

Answer 6

Just keep hanging in there with it and don't let the crying bother you too much. Babies develop personalities soon enough and he sounds like he's trying to just voice his objections to the loss of the swing, crying is the only way he can do that. He'll be OK after awhile and learn to deal with it. Good Luck!!!

Answer 7

Well, i'm not gonna blame anything on you because noone is perfect but he's 8 months and that's a habit that may not be broken. When my baby was first born, he used to cry and cry because he wanted to be held and he wanted to sleep wit me. Now, he's 4 months and he has a routine. But it took two and a half months to get that routine working. So, just keep working wit him and don't let him cry for more than 40 min. again because he could develop a hernia.

Answer 8

i had one daughter who wouldn't take a nap whatsoever.
When she did she would wake up and cry for 2 hours. I discovered that the best thing to do, is take them for a ride in a car. The need to sleep because they are growing. Sometimes they cry for no apparent reason and you don't know what to do. I would let the child cry it out if they are comfortable, and try to get them to sleep at the same time everyday, and then also just realize that when a child is tired they will sleep. Sometimes my daughter used to fall asleep on her pad when she was playing, and i would just leave her there. She slept and felt better when she woke up. Don't stress out, relax, and let nature take its course with the child. He will be okay

Answer 9

I know where I live, if you let your baby cry it out for more than 20 minutes it is considered neglect and you can have Children and youth at the door step. I would research other ways, look online and check out parenting books at the library. I hope you can resolve this, i know it can all be very hard especially when you have to work and hold down the usual tasks at home too.

Answer 10

It depends on how stubborn they are. 1st you can go in at the beg, tell him your here you love him and then leave. Try putting on some music, it really helped me. The more noise you have around the home the better they will sleep, the quieter you try to keep it the harder it for you and the baby. It will take about a week for him to get into a routine with hi cups for the next 2 wks. It will get btr, it just kills you while your doing it.