i want to see my kids?

Question

I have 3 boys and I pay c s a for them
But she wont let me see my boys anymore just because I have a girlfriend this has been going on for a year now (have been with new girlfriend 11 months)
They used to come to our house but since shes asked r divorce she wont let them come and now all because I have asked for 15% of the house when the boys grow up
Should I take her to court to force her to let me see my boys or should I leave it
And do you think it is right that a father who wants to see and provide should be forced top pay her full c s a payments or do you think they should give her less untill she lets me see them

i asked for 15% off 100% so why am i not being fair??? i payed for it for 15 years so i think i should get something its all paied for so she lives there rent for nothing at least im waiting untill the kids leave home

i cant talk to her as she is violent shes on bail for hitting me while i was sat down with my seat belt on in my car i did nothing
and i cant afford to go to court as she never turns up

i just to have them stop with me 3 days a week but she stopped that thats why i have to pay so much csa she stopped me seeing them in october

Answer 1

Look, I am a father myself and I myself don't care what happens, I will want to see my kid and have her in my life.You should never allow her to control your situation with them.
I would call your lawyer and get on this a.s.a.p because who knows what she is telling them boys as to why they don't see you anymore.
I have to say I don't know how you could have dealt with this so long and not did anything about it.Those are your kids man!!, and anything in this world couldn't and shouldn't come between you and them in life.No love or lack of it with anyone else in this world could ever match the unconditional love between a parent and their child.Get back to court and nail her butt to the wall. Sooner the better, before she wrecks what you and your kids have as a relationship for life.

Answer 2

I think you should take her to court and dfo whatever you can legally to see your children. Whatever is going on between the two of you should remain between the two of you, the children should not be paying for it. Her keeping them away from you is punishing them for the mistakes made in the marriage. I hope she can see that and realize that your home is safe despite having a woman there and allow you the visit you need with your kids.
Maybe you should ask her to go visit the home and let her see where the kids would be sleeping or spending time to ease her worries. If that doesn't work try making her understand that the boys are growing up and need you as a role model in their lives. It's a real shame though because I know people who just pay child support but never care to see the children they're paying for and here you are tryting to do right by your children and you can't.
I wish you the best of luck and hope you guys can work this out in a way that doesn't send any bad messages to the kids or where they have to see any animosity between you.

Answer 3

Continue to pay CSA cos that's for your children not for her but take her to court for regular access you are entitled to it unless the boys refuse. She can not have full control over their lives, I'm sure they would want to see their dad. She's just jealous that you have a new girlfriend and is trying to get back at you the only way she knows how but it will be hurting the boys as well and she needs to be made to consider their feelings and not her own. This isn't about you or her or who you are both seeing its about what is best for your children. Take her to court use Citizens Advice legal representative they are cheaper and even if it doesn't work out at least you can say to your children you tried your best to maintain contact with them. Keep trying every time she doesnt turn up its a mark against her and one up for you. Good luck

Answer 4

If you two are divorce, it's already in the agreement that you have visitation rights. You can go to court to pursue that issue but it's really a waste because you can't make her and there's no one to really keep track of this. I would try communicating with your x and maybe promise her that the girlfriend will not be around the kids at least til the healing process for your x starts. Obviously she is still hurt by this situation and she's using the kids against you (which is not right or fair). Maybe you need to set up mutual meeting places for the boys like a non judgmental grandparent house at least til you two can work out your differences. Good luck.

Answer 5

You have a right to see your children. I take it you have a good relationship with your boys and your new girlfriend gets on with them ok. You have to tell your ex you have the right to see your children if not you will be seeing a solicitor. You are doing the right thing by paying csa money. keep calm when you talk to your ex about this you dont want confrontation because if it goes to court she may say you are abusive and threatening.. She is punishing the children and using them for emotional blackmail all because you are getting on with your life.

Answer 6

You always have a right to see your children, whether or not you pay maintenance. Unless there are other reasons which you haven't shared with us, like violence towards the children.
It's got nothing to do with money.
You should see a solicitor. Don't mess with the money - my brother did and almost landed in jail. Not worth it just to prove a point.
As for the house, you need to come to some agreement. Why did your marriage break up? If you up and left to be with your new girlfriend, that's a bit unfair.

Answer 7

Say well, I guess if I am not seeing my kids, you do not get the child support!
I wouldn't REALLY not give her it becuase you can get into trouble, but HEY if you are not divorced, then why would you have to pay it? You haven't been ordered to pay it yet. You can talk to a lawyer and fight for custody of the kids. I would tell her You are going for 50% of EVERYTHING now!
If she has a history of being abusive to you( which women do abuse men and it is not as talked about) then she might not get to have the kids at all!

Answer 8

She`s being totally unreasonable and spiteful. I would see a solicitor asap. She`s also not being fair to the boys. As for the house I would get everything I was entitled to after her stupid, childish behaviour, but I wouldn`t tell her until the time comes to split it. Silly cow.

Answer 9

If you want to see your boys and there is a court order she can't stop you at all. Child support will always go to her cause they live with her. If you have visitation in the court order she is violating it press the issue. Your boys need you also not just a angry mom they need their dad also.

Answer 10

Call your local district attorney in the child support division of your local court house. Also make your child support case worker aware. You can"t keep the child away from a parent unless the courts has ordered it. I am a single dad I know.