I used to not be able to achieve orgasm, and for a long time, I just wasn't interested in sex anymore. I have a new boyfriend now, and I must say that life has treated me VERY WELL after meeting him. Honestly, I am starting to feel that the process of having orgasm is more mental than physical, though.
2007-01-08 03:48:10 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
You have a new boyfriend that treats you right in what respect, sexually ? If you have had bad experiences with sex or he is doing something you really don't like, or if you feel like sex is an obligation, then of course you are not going to achieve orgasm. If you are laying there thinking " hurry up" or your mind is on other things , it won't happen. Maybe you just need to relax or maybe you need something more to get you there. If you are comfortable with your new sexual partner, then try/ suggest new things. If this does not work, then discuss it with a sex therapist or OBGYN it could be a physical problem
2007-01-08 03:59:31 · answer #1 · answered by vivib 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although females vary, many women need the following if they're going to reach a climax:
a romantic atmosphere
pleasant, comfortable surroundings
a partner who they really like
a feeling of being wanted and appreciated
a good flow of natural lubrication - so that the delicate female parts don't get sore
a skilled partner who knows how to stimulate the clitoris.
Unless you can provide the above, you are not going to have great success in giving your partner orgasms.
Please bear in mind that - contrary to what many men think - sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman's clitoris. Nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth.
What to do
In summary, here's what to do if you want to bring your partner to orgasm regularly:
don't be in a rush.
don't be too demanding - it's not an Olympic event.
talk to your partner, and ask her what she wants you to do to her.
always create a romantic atmosphere.
make sure that everything is comfortable and nice for her.
give her lots of kisses and cuddles before you even think about making any approach to her sexual area.
when you do start to stroke, rub or kiss her genitals, don't rush into 'attacking' her clitoris. Take things gently, and see what she wants.
use her own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris. (If she is over 40, it may be a good idea to use some additional lubrication from a chemist or a sex shop).
remember that stimulation of the clitoris is the key to female orgasm.
sometimes encourage her to run your sex sessions. You can learn a lot by watching how she stimulates herself or by really listening to her when she suggests a sex position, or a particular caress.
2007-01-08 06:03:29 · answer #2 · answered by Komsat/sad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have to say it is more mental at first. Once you have a few of them and discover just how wonderful orgasms are you can get back to that mental comfort level much quicker. You should try reaching them on your own first so that you know what they feel like and can be comfortable with someone else.
2007-01-08 03:52:24 · answer #3 · answered by Who Knew! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is more of a mental thing for me. If i say "hury up" to myself while masturbating, I find that I don't even get wet. But if I start thinking of a guy I like or a girl I met online (I'm bi-curious) and they are "doing" to me what I'm doing, then I start to feel the warmth and build-up.
Also, honestly, I orgasm the easest with I'm on my period.
I hope this helps.
2007-01-08 04:17:46 · answer #4 · answered by happy02170 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because most men are inadequate. I'm not talking about penis size (though that is a factor), I'm talking about knowing how to talk to a woman, how to touch and caress a woman, how to really get her warmed up for sex, and how to send her through the roof in ecstasy. Men pretty much ALWAYS orgasm, but our orgasms are dependent on THEIR sexual prowess, so we often feel unsatisfied when all's said and done.
2007-01-08 04:03:01 · answer #5 · answered by G 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
a great form of the girls are unaware of Orgasm and experience shy to talk it and demand it. that's somewhat easy - they could desire to comprehend extra how Clitoris could properly be manipulated so as that they could attain Orgasm. additionally they are mentally preoccupied hence no longer able to realize rest stages that are mandatory to get to Orgasm.
2016-11-27 19:52:00 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it can be a number of things. but for most women it does start with the mind. you have to be able to talk to him to, tell him to do this or do that. sometimes too you jus have to find yourself, meanin see what you like on your own. you also could be like many of the women out there that need clitoral stimulation. in which case find ways of mixin that into the act. once you take the time to figure out the goods and the bads youll be much happier, i promise. good luck~!
2007-01-08 04:17:22 · answer #7 · answered by oreosrevenge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They weren't taught right.
2007-01-08 03:54:07 · answer #8 · answered by judy f 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋