I’ve spent my entire life being the kind of person who was obsessed with whether or not others liked me. I never thought, "Wait a minute! Do I like YOU?!” I realized this flaw recently when after almost two years of giving of my love, time, patience, energy, money and assistance to my three live in step kids (ages 10, 12 and 14) I no longer care if they like/accept me. I'm child-free. I met the kids 7 yrs into our marriage b/c they were in another country and spoke no English. I helped them to come here at their mom (his 1st wife) and dad's (my husband) request. He is a workaholic and only home about 15 waking min per day. After spending HUNDREDS of hours doing activities with them, talking with them, spending my time, energy, patience, etc. I’ve decided they are lying, deceitful, judgmental, narrow-minded, American-hating, manipulative, sneaky, stealing little beasts. I avoid them to escape their ugly, disrespectful personalities. Do you think this means I must leave my home/marriage?
2007-01-07 22:03:49 · 9 answers · asked by Angel1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I WOULD SIT DOWN AND TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT IT AND THEN GO FROM THERE.
2007-01-07 22:07:10 · answer #1 · answered by misty blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked with your hubby about the kids? If you haven't, that's the first step. Be honest about the way that they are and have him deal with them fully...he should discipline the in a way that they are to understand to respect you 110%. Even if it means time away from work because obviously him not being at home has a lot to do with it. And the way u make it sound the kids might need some counseling as well. However I believe it is now up to your husband to get the situation under control. If the situation isn't dealt with properly within a reasonable amount of time, you may want to consider leaving if you aren't happy.
2007-01-07 22:13:37 · answer #2 · answered by sdc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good on you - what is the point of the marriage if he is only home for that amount of time - I think he sees you as the nanny and not the wife - you deserve a medal now go and have a life and be happy!
P.S. don't forget to take some of his hard earned money - even though i reckon you worked harder
2007-01-07 22:08:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As cruel as it seems, you are not obligated to crap. your husband is a workaholic, so you are not only doing your part, you are doing his too. Whats the point if he isnt there anyway? I dont think its worth it to be married to someone you never see, just to take care of his brats (yes, those ages, they are little punk a$$ brats) REALLY, from what you describe, add up the time he is available wouldnt even equal to a full day in a weeks worth of work, you dont HAVE to love his kids and I wouldnt either in your position. And, the fact you have no children of your own...going from a single woman to a mother of 3 PRE-TEENS would be really ruff anyway, even if they were good kids. It seems they dont like you either, they dont understand how to be appreciative. if you stay, you are basically there to raise them, and thats it. if this guy is rich, its still not worth it in my opinion. you have done alot already, let their momma and dad take over, you go have yourself a vacation!! meet someone who has time for you, and start your family with one kid at a time starting as a baby.
2007-01-07 22:18:27 · answer #4 · answered by dianek 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a serious talk with your husband first off. Tell him how you feel the kids act towards you. Then have the father talk with the kids and tell them how you believe they treat you and tell them they our going to have to be more respectful towards the women he loves no matter if they accept it or not. Good uck try having your own kid. They will love you. Good Luck
2007-01-07 22:15:44 · answer #5 · answered by blazin_cripz_2006_0wner.sheena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow! you particularly dislike those youngsters! you're humorous, calling them little beasts! haha...i like my women baby, maybe i'm fortunate. my youngsters like my female additionally. That could desire to be a great form of tension to you to stay in that form of ecosystem. maybe you are able to desire to pass away. he's not in any respect homestead for you in any case. you ought to divorce him and get alimony and stay on my own! with out those little sneaky, stealing mendacity beasts!
2016-11-27 19:14:45 · answer #6 · answered by duque 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt mean you have got to leave your marriage,but it sounds as if you are ready too.you should sit down with hubbie and allow him to read your question and the answers.if that doesnt work and begin the discussion,then it sounds as if you are the perfect built in baby sitter.if you really have tried to make it work with your step kids,and they are as bad as you stated,then wash your hands of them,and tell "their father" that its his turn
2007-01-07 22:15:07 · answer #7 · answered by shay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've being in your shoes before. Don't let them still your joy. Cut them out.
2007-01-07 22:08:35 · answer #8 · answered by cb56br 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
...send them to boarding schools or hostels.
2007-01-07 22:07:30 · answer #9 · answered by saumitra s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋