My daughter is a good hearted kid I think. She is 14 years old and gets upset about everything. She was skipping a class at school. She has a nasty attitude toward her sisters. She is really loud and and to me does not take life seriously. She acts like a 5 year old. When I talk to her it has a affect for a few days then she is back to her old self. She doesn't even want to do her hair or keep clean and act like a young lady. What can I do I need any one's advice me and dad are stressing about her present and future.
2007-01-07 19:11:49 · 16 answers · asked by Nectory S 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
It sounds to me there is more going on than just teen rebellion. The not keeping clean and do normal grooming habits, along with her moodiness, etc sounds like depression may be going hand and hand with this. Speak with her doctor and consider counseling. Teen years are hard enough without suffering through depression as well. It's better to rule it out than have her suffer inside.
1 in 8 teens are actually depressed, but the symptoms are often ignored which can lead to further problems, you can't just 'snap' out of it.
I wish you all the best, I don't think you need to have her admitted as one participant suggested, that is way too extreme. But it wouldn't hurt to talk to her doctor about her behavior. You might also speak with her teachers and see if they have noticed any of the signs.
2007-01-08 18:03:43 · answer #1 · answered by Wicked Good 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her to a counseler. The class she is skipping..find out whats going on. There may be kids that are harrassing her or intimidating her or teasing her. Talk to the teacher and ask he or she to keep tract of your child and how she is being treated. It could also be the teacher thats bothering her. Its not unusual fir a male teacher to be messing with your kid, you see it on the news everyday. Not taking care of herself is a sign that she may be being abused and to not take care of herself..she may be trying to put off her abuser. Do you treat her sister differently? She may *think* that you love her sister more than her, you said that she has been causing trouble..maybe you need to focuss on the positive things she does. Say thank you and please and DO NOT yell at her. SHe may feel like shes being attacked even though you are trying to help her get back to what you think is normal. She IS only 14 years old therefor still a child and does not know the real world like adults. Let her be a teen, she does not have that much time left! Take the family out to the movies or some structured activity and include her but make sure its something she likes as well. Ask her what she would like to do. GO out to eat. Simple things make all the difference. Dont put so much pressure on her to be that way you think she needs to be. Tell her she looks pretty or you love the jeans she wears even if you hate them. Remeber you were a kid at one time and i am sure you did things that made your parents cringe
2007-01-07 19:24:03 · answer #2 · answered by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her go to school stinky. I was pretty much the same way when i was that age, i was just rebelling because i felt that my parents were trying to control me. So once when me and my mom got into (another) argument, she just said "whatever" so she let me do basically what i wanted (as far as hygiene) and as it turned out, i discovered on my own that i didn't want to be the "smelly kid" in class, so i started taking better care of my self. Now i am doing much much better, i am more responsible, and i won't say that i "love" taking showers, but i sure don't mind taking them (every day). i even got a volunteering gig at a local shelter,and i am now looking at colleges that i might want to attend. If you girl is as much like me as she sounds, she is just trying to declare her independance. Just give her a little space,and if stuff gets too out of hand, you could do what my parents did and start taking stuff from me, one thing at a time, after i was in an empty room for about a month, i got over my little "bad streak". Good Luck!
2007-01-07 19:40:43 · answer #3 · answered by Confused & Young 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's probably just a phase, but even so, you need to talk to her. Tell her you and her dad EXPECT her to be polite and that it is her responsibility to go to all her classes and be nice to her sisters. There isn't much else you can do except keep hounding her, which won't go over very well but eventually the phase will pass. If it doesn't pass in a few months, I would say talk to someone who is qualified to know what's going on... a doctor maybe. Also, something might be going on in HER life that's making her act this way and you should talk to her about it before giving her any lectures or jumping to conclusions. Teens don't always tell their parents when something's bothering them, but it just means you have to dig a little deeper.
2007-01-08 02:03:10 · answer #4 · answered by GeekGirl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I say that it's a phase. As an early teenager I was a bit out of control myself. I was a complete slob (sadly 10 years later that hasn't changed much) but I didn't care about my personal appearance, grades, nor anything around me. I did have alot going on at the time emotionally. So as a parent I think the best think you can do is to be there for your child. She will probably push you away and attempt not to talk to you... teenage rebellion. But make sure that she knows that you care. Be strong she will come through this phase.
2007-01-07 19:19:07 · answer #5 · answered by lapyramid 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes Teens Go Into 'Different Phazes'
My Friend, 12 years old went into a type of Punk,rock,chik type of style and is still at it Im getting angry because she acts like she dosent know me and has got new friends and i was her best friend for 5 years then suddenly Booom!, Im just a reject on the side of the road!!
2007-01-07 23:20:06 · answer #6 · answered by Valuable Diamond 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
14 is the difficult age.If she wont talk to you then find a school counselor because something is bothering her.Get her to have a checkup.What about her periods?Have they come? She might suffering from PMTas well /That can make you angry.Her hormomes are all over the place.Be patient.Maybe she finds being a teenager difficult.
2007-01-07 21:05:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
DEAR you and your husband are going to something you do not want do is set her up a doctors apartment at the hospital and tell her you have to get a blood test get the doctor set it all up for you and your husband for a 96 hour hold in the cynical ward for testing you will not be able to stay with her but you need to see what is really wrong with her there is something there and all the test will show it test do not lie good luck with lots of love and a happy new year
2007-01-07 19:19:00 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe sumthings bothering her tell her that she can talk 2 u about anything but dont make her your bestfriend go places if u can n let her know she needs 2 be more respectful about her body n 2 her parents or jus beat her ***
2007-01-07 19:18:53 · answer #9 · answered by Fe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hormones are running wild grit your teeth and hang on it's going to be a bumppy ride. Talk to her find out what she is into and do it with her build a friendship with her as you can be her parent as well as her friend. Everyone remembers what it's like to be 14
2007-01-07 23:49:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋