thanks for name but... i'm pregnant at 13?

Question

i really like this guy and he doesnt know i'm pregnant i want the baby but i'm only 13 what should i do my mom wants me to get an abortion and he did kind of pressure me into gettin wit him OMG i need help

Answer 1

Hi my name is Fiona and i am 16. I have recently been in this situation although i am a little bit older. Whilst you want the child and your mum wants you to have a termination, it may be important for you to talk to your partner to see what he wants and if he would support you.

In saying this i also think you really need to keep a close relationship with your mum. When i found out i was pregnant all i wanted to do was ignore my mum. When i told her i was pregnant she was angry at first then sad and then we had a big talk.

about 12 months ago i was raped and we thought i was pregnant from that and we went through the same thing. I have always said that if i become pregnant i would never have a termination because that is horrible, so then when i actually was pregnant i really had to sit down and think, Can i give this baby the best mentally, physically and financially and most of all how will this effect me for my future, sure i would love for someone to need me to love and care for them and for them to look up to me but seriously, whats worse, a termination before the child is born or bringing a child into a world where it cannot be supported like it is needed to be.

This is where i figured my mum came into the picture, sure i didnt want her to be mad and hate me, but gennerally it was my desicion. I think personally what you need to do is talk to a pregnancy councilor over the phone or face-to-face and consioder your options for you, your mum, the baby and your partner and remember your 13 you have the rest of your life to have kids to love and them to love you back, and if you like this guy as much as you say you do, stay with him and talk tp him, let him no whats happening and how you feel,

Just you remember this is a very hard decision you have to make and i think you really need assistance on telling you your options. No-one can assist you with the answer because in the end its your life and your consequences. Please imagine that you have chosen each decision and how you would feel after. Really try and put yourself in the shoes of that decision.

Even if you dont want to keep the baby but cant face termination, think of other options like adoption. Stay strong! And keep smiling, no matter what decision you make you are still yourself and have not changed do not let this ruin your life make each step a positive one. First step: seek proffessional advice, Second: Talk to your mum and build a relationship, Third: Talk to your partner (remember you might not even be together forever), Fourth: Keep your head up no matter what and THINK POSITIVE !!

Love Always Fiona xoxox
P.S if you would like to talk further email me

Answer 2

Well, I am a mom of a 13 year old boy.
Honey, I think you and your mom should go see an OB for a serious health consult. You are very young and there could be serious health issues for you if you carry a baby to term.

I could preach about how young you are and that you shouldn't be having sex..but those words are to little, to late in your situation and should not come from strangers, but your mother.

You have several options: Abortion, Adoption or keeping the baby
All decisions you will have to live with for life, unfortunately.

If my son were to get someone pregnant at this age, I truly would hope that the decision was made to give the baby up for adoption. At 13 you will have no life after a baby, unless an "adult" raises your baby for you.

I hope you make a decision that you can live with, this is a HUGE decision for a 13 year old to make. Good Luck

Answer 3

I'm 14 and i know how easy it is for guys to get into your head and make you do stupid things but ultI'mately your the one who did it and you have to deal with the consequences and im not trying to preach to you or blame you for anything because Ive done some stupid things too. About the baby its your choice dont let the father,your parents or any one else pressure you into making a decision you'll regret.
If you think you should get an abortion then go for it. Some people say its murder and maybe it is but hey think about this, how many people remember anything before the age of 2? None.Dont get me wrong I'm not saying you have to have one.
If you have the baby and put it up for adoption just remember you'll probally never see it again. Think if you could live with knowing theres a child out there that belongs to you and you will never see them because you have no right to.
And if you wanna keep the baby just make sure you can provide a good happy home for it.
Its your choice though and i hope you make a good one. Good luck!

Answer 4

I am not for abortion and I don't really like adoption but adoption is better than getting an Abortion. Talk to your mom maybe you both can come to an agreement that you don't have to get an Abortion but so u know the guy will find out in a few months when you start to show so just tell him now get it over with

Answer 5

YOU SHOULD KEEP THE BABY. YOU SHOULD TELL YOUR MOTHER THAT YOU WANT THE BABY, AND SHE SHOULD SUPPORT YOU, IF SHE DONT SUPPORT YOU KEEP THE BABY ANYWAY. REMEMBER, IT IS NOT ONLY YOUR BABY, IT TAKES TWO TO MAKE ONE, THE FATHER SHOULD ALWAYS HAVE THE RIGHT TO SEE IT AND TO GIVE HIS OPINION ON ISSUES RELATED TO THE BABY. GOOD LUCK!!

From the moment the sperm meets the egg it is a human being, a baby, a person, how much is “developed” is not relevant. From the moment the sperm meets the egg, that person DNA is unique and will always be the same before and after puberty development and for the rest of that person life. The baby is not an organ of the female body and is not part of the female body, simply because is inside her do not give her the right to kill the baby, that is like saying “you are inside my house so I have the right to kill you”. The Father has no right to kill the baby either((Father rights=Mother rights)=EQUALITY). No one have the right to kill the baby. If you want the right to have sex, you must accept the responsibilities FIRST, is that simple. Don’t kill your responsibilities.

Many women that do it, get extremely emotionally affected after, especially when young. It is a natural healthy feeling. People that don’t have feelings are called selfish, irresponsible SOCIOPATHS!

PRO-CHOICE??? You don’t have the choice to kill others!!! Your rights end the moment the other person’s rights begin, and “vice versa”. Don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you.

Answer 6

Being a pregnant 13 year old, I could understand the pressure these days to have sex. Heck, even 15, 16 years old cannot controll themselves, let alone 13 year olds. I don't know why people never like what I have to say but here's my advice. Keep the baby and seek an obygyn. You know your options and I think you can carry this baby to term becuase even 4'11 moms could carry and if they could, then you could too! I woman doesn't have to be big down there to give birth either. Have a "c section" or have an epidural, that'll ease the pain. until then, good luck and congrats! A baby is a wonderful thing, but a big, no wait, scratch that, enormous responsibility! hope all goes well with you in the future. I know how you feel!

Oh and maybe you could get some counseling also at your junior high or high school. Talk to your pastor too! Don't loose your friends, but don't get too involved with them in a bad way. Just some more advice.

Answer 7

This is a difficult situation. First, I would say don't have a baby just because you really like the guy. 9 times out 10 that won't make him want to be with you. In fact, at that age it may scare him off. Second, before you make up your mind think of everything you are going to have to do to take care of a baby.

I had a baby when I was teenager. I was a four years older than you and it was hard at first. I didn't have anyone that I could rely on to help me out. It was just me and my son but I made it work. Do what you feel is right just look at both the pros and cons. Good luck!!

Answer 8

If you cannot be a mother and support your child, don't have a baby. You are even too young to get a job and you won't even get a decent one without a high school diploma. Either abort or give it up for adoption.

Medical care, delivering the baby and raising a child will cost you $20,000 the first year.

Answer 9

I don't know why some people say rude things to you. They must just remember that you are only human and humans make mistakes. What you must do is up to you. Every one can tell you do this and do that, but at the end of the day it is all up to you. But just sit down and think. You will not have a childhood at all. I had my daughter when I was 15 and I did not have a childhood, but I had great support from my parents. While my friends were out and about, I was sitting at home chaging napies. Is that the kind of life you want? i am 25 now and pregnant with a baby boy. Only now at this age I feel ready to be a mom.

Good luck and I will be thinking of you. You can im me if you need someone to talk to or just to listen.

Answer 10

At your age, having this baby jeopardizes your body and the life of your child. However, giving the baby up for adoption would be a better idea if you are against abortion. As for the guy, just let him know that you have a lot going on with your life and it isn't a good idea for the two of you to be together for now. Also, lay off the sex you are way too young!