Does This Sound Like A Good...(English Teachers...Others are Welcome Too!)?

Question

Letter?...Please make corrections and whatever else you think will help her understand my situation better. Thank you in advance.

Dear Ms.Thiel,

How are you? I hope your weekend is going well.

I have emailed you because I recall that on Friday, you asked our 5th period Honors English class to bring in the corrected & graded copy of the Persuasive Essay. However, I do not remember ever recieving it back. I do remember that you handed it back to us so that we could see or grades but then, I also remember you recollecting it. After this, I never remember recieving it back.

I have looked through my English notebook and folder. In addition, I have also searched through the rest of my folders and notebooks with the doubt that I may have misplaced it. However, I have not found the essay yet- after looking for it in the period of this weekend.

I think that a possible explanation for this is that I was absent the day you handed it back to us and so,

I was never given the essay back. Another explanation is that I misplaced it myself, which I do honestly doubt because I have never lost an assignment before. Either way, I was wondering if you could take a look through the papers you have in your posession right now and see if you still have my persuasive essay. If not, is there an alternative way I can make this up?

I was wondering if I could take the document saved on my computer, reprint it, and take it to the English Lab to have all my mistakes corrected or come 6th period (if you are not busy) and sit down with you to correct it the way you had previously.

I would like you to please take everything written in this into consideration. I will visit your classroom tomorrow morning to speak to you personally.

Thank you for reading this.

Sincerely,

Megha Shah

Answer 1

Seems a very diplomatic approach, but 4 suggestions:

1) I would save the well-wishing for the end of the letter
2) RecEIVing, not recIEVing
3) Be wary of saying the same thing over and over. Try to make it more concise.
4) No need to request to consider. Just wish her well and tell her you'll meet with her.

Answer 2

Do you really need to write a letter? I would just speak with her...

Anyway, you need to correct your misspellings, but the content looks good. You don't need to ask her about herself; it's a business letter. You also don't need to be so wordy. Here is your original with my corrections:


Dear Ms.Thiel:

This e-mail is in regards to our recent Persuasive Essay assignment.

On Friday, you asked our 5th period Honors English class to bring in the corrected and graded copy. I remember that you handed it back to us so that we could see our grades; however, I believe you re-collected it. I do not remember receiving it again later.

Though I have thoroughly searched through my English notebook and folder, as well as the rest of my folders and notebooks, I have not been able to find it.

I have been absent recently, and I believe my absence may have been on the day upon which you handed it back to us. Could you please take the time to search through your papers from our class to see if it is still in your possession?

If it is not, and I have indeed misplaced it, I would be more than willing to resubmit another copy or to make up the assignment in another way.

I will visit your classroom tomorrow morning in order to receive your reply.

Thank you for your time.


Sincerely,

Megha Shah

Answer 3

I have emailed you because I REMEMBER that on Friday, you asked our 5th period Honors English class to bring in the corrected & graded copy of the Persuasive Essay, However, I do not RECALL IT BEING RETURNED.

I HAVE CHECKED EVERYWHERE WHERE IT COULD BE, BUT I DON'T SEEM TO HAVE FOUND IT. I WAS ABSENT ON (LIST DATES...YOU CAN GET THEM FROM THE OFFICE) AND PERHAPS YOU RETURNED OUR ESSAYS ON THOSE DAYS.

IF YOU HAVE THE TIME, PLEASE CHECK AROUND TO SEE IF YOU HAVE MY PAPER ANYWHERE. IF IT HAS BEEN MISPLACED, THEN I COULD REPRINT MY PAPER AND DURING A TIME MOST COMFORTABLE FOR YOU, GO THROUGH MY MISTAKES AGAIN. I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU GAVE ME A CHANCE TO TURN THIS PAPER IN.

THANK YOU

okay so the begining is good, but in the end u begin making it seem like she is responsible for the loss...make it more about her, and about how she is doing u a favor. dont thank her for reading the paper, but thank her in general as i did. dont put (if u are busy) in parenthesis because that shows that u are putting urself first, but throoughout writing this paper, you must, and i mean absolutely must remember that SHE is doing YOU the favor.

otherwise not bad,

hope i helped.

Answer 4

It sounds pretty good to me, plus very politely written. She will understand your situation. Just check some misspellings (receiving). Good luck, girl :)