Lately my boyfriend and i have had a rough patch. But we were just starting to get better. Then today was our 3 month aniversery (i no its not that big of a deal)but he offered to take me to a pretty nice italian resturant. but he doesn't call me at all, he told me we would go around 6. So i send him a text message at 5 saying that, "i can't stay out too late tonight because i have classes early tommorow." he replied saying, "theres only a place at 8 and im not sure if i can go, i have so much **** to do." i told him, "o ok, w/e do what u have to do." he then told me how he had to fix a broiler in bronx +he had a case study due tommorow. i didn't say nething and he said are you mad, i go no i just wish u hadn't made plans if u knew u had so much stuff to do. 15 minutes later he texts me back saying then next time he just won't make plans. I don't get why he always has to turn the situation around and make me the bad person... what should say back him?
2007-01-07 09:49:14 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Just text him saying .."yeah, you shouldn't make plans you don't intend to keep. I'm not mad...It's just dissapointing when I kind of had gotten excited to be able to go out to dinner with you and celebrate... it's cool..just try not to do it in the future."
If you act like you are dissapointed or hurt and not mad, he will feel more like an *** and possibly try and make it up to you.
Also, if you nag him about it he will probably just get annoyed and not care....it's better if you are the bigger person because guys tend to like more low-key girls.
2007-01-07 09:53:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a typical arguement, he's got a lot of work going on and trying to fit you in at the same time, next time make sure everything is in order and his day is pretty much clear, also you can't expect him to always be able to work his day perfectly around yours. Last day plans weren't in full order, you were expecting one thing he was expecting another. Just call him tommorow and say hi and act as if nothing happened unless he brings it up, if he does just say lets not worry about it and we will plan better next time.
2007-01-07 17:58:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would give him the silent treatment! He deserves it! I think he flips the script on you because he's used to doing it and getting away with it. How would he feel if you did something like that? So, if it wasn't for you texting him at 5pm to tell him that you couldn't be out late he would've never told you that plans were cancelled?...I think that's wrong and he knows it...don't let it bother you though...like you said 3 months isn't really a big deal anyways...it's just the fact that he was inconsiderate.
Good luck
2007-01-07 18:15:31 · answer #3 · answered by Nik Nak 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you love him and that you do enjoy spending time with him.
Forget the episode ever happened.
Then the two of you together look at your schedules for the next week or so and see where you all can put a 'date night' with no hassle. It will be good for you both, especially after a rough patch.
Good luck!
2007-01-07 17:54:48 · answer #4 · answered by YaYa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello =)
Well....
You're acting like a "Jewish Mother"....no disrespect to those dear souls intended....
The boy didn't start out to ruin the day, sweetheart. It's not his fault that the restaurant didn't have an earlier reservation. It's not his fault that the boiler in the bronx broke, and now needs his attention. It's not his fault that he has school work to do, which clashes with YOUR schoolwork.... He's trying to make the time to see you by extending his day...you're trying to shorten your day to make your schoolwork come first....you see??
And then, you shift the burden of guilt to him, by essentially saying that you're disappointed in his inability to keep to "plans".....well....that's life, dear....things don't go according to plan, and he's trying to make it ok, and you're not.....
You can control a man through guilt, dear, if you must, but he will resent you the entire time.....wouldn't you rather control a man through love??
Namaste,
--Tom
2007-01-07 17:58:16 · answer #5 · answered by glassnegman 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not do anything because he just angry right try be there for him. stuff come up. it sound like he was upset with him self because he could not take you out, next time just time him that you loved the he thought doing something when most guy forget that stuff. just let him know that it alright.
2007-01-07 17:54:59 · answer #6 · answered by RLC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be the bigger person and say well lets just do it another time then when both of us have more time and leave it at that. dont make a big deal about small stuff.
2007-01-07 18:05:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are only together three months and you re having problems like that already i don't think this relationship will go very far. picture yourselves this time next year and how do you imagine it to be?
2007-01-07 17:56:44 · answer #8 · answered by ciara_e2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say nothing. But if you do say something then say, "why do you turn everything around and make me seem like the bad guy?"
2007-01-07 17:53:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him exactly that. tell him how it is. if you just try to say it in a nice way and screw it all up, then either he'll be confused or he'll get the wrong message.
2007-01-07 17:53:02 · answer #10 · answered by Konrad 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋