someone found out im gay on facebook (we're family friends and i've never met that person in real life, even though we graduated from the same highschool and she is one year older than me...guess she cant judge me like that right?)...she decided to tell her mom...her mom thought it was mad and TOLD my mom through phone...guess it was really bad...i mean my mom took it bad.........still i kept denying it...well i CANT come out yet because of various reasons...1) im still in college...i need support....2) i dont want her to be ashamed (im not cuz ive been like this since ever) this sucks i guess...after all just hard times im going thro....the weird thing...that person's mom kept telling me to "BE YOURSELF"....well i am being myself...unless i have to live a lie just to make others happy...its annoying how straights keep trying to turn gays straight...its impossible...cant wait to get older so i can at least be on my own...live the life i want and support myself..ok TELL ME WHAT TO DO?
2007-01-07 07:21:20 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Check out this video and see if it might be helpful. You could even show it to your mother.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kfqZaRR8u4
2007-01-07 07:32:01 · answer #1 · answered by castle h 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You being gay is not going to go away and wouldnt you rather tell her now rather than waiting a few years before bringing up the subject again to tell her yes you are gay and you lied to her before.
This is not going to go away and the longer you leave it the harder it will be.
Find a support group in your area that will help you and maybe go stay with a friend untill she calms down ands gets used to the idea. She is your mum after all and im sure after she has took it all in, she will accept you for who you are. Find some leaflets on being gay and give them to your mum to have a read of, this may help her understand you a little better.
Goodluck hun in whatever you decide to do.
2007-01-07 08:08:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all I object to "its annoying how straights keep trying to turn gays straight"...not all of us straights have an issue with homosexuals, lesbians or bisexuals... Some of us actually do see value in you all as individuals, so please see each of us "straights" as individuals too...
Secondly, I don't envy anyone in a position where they have to live a life they don't want to live because of their potential support being taken away. Although you could always sit down and try and determine if their is a way you can possibly take control of your own life and support yourself in some way... Are you in high school or college? Are you an adult? If you're in college you could always consider getting a full time job and attending night school, or get financial aid that will assist you in taking care of yourself...
2007-01-07 07:46:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's always a risk associated with revealing personal information online. So, one must always be prepared to be discovered if they choose to do so. Although maybe everyone shoudl and we could all be discovered and just get it over with as a mass eh.
As for how to handle it all, well, if yoru family is goign to disown you and there are good reasons to not have tha thappen just yet, then try living yoru own life as you choose away from the family and nosy freinds of the family. And when those types are aroudn, be a good person in their eyes and leave your current flame elsewhere.
2007-01-07 07:31:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Thats crappy of your moms friend to bring you out like that,I would tell my mom that I wanted to have a talk with her. Ask her to just listen to you before she yells or gets crazy. Tell her the truth about who you are. Your her daughter. She should love ya no matter what. If your not ready, then take your time. Don't worry about when your friends or mom is ready to hear this. This is your life and you come out when you are ready. My mom's not here anymore,but we were like best friends. She would have understood. But you know your mom better than we do. Just be you and if you lose friends over the true you,well then they are not the friends you thought they were. I wish u good luck. try not to be so stressed about all this.=)
2007-01-07 07:33:54 · answer #5 · answered by sexygal8321 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, my parents forced me to come out of the closet 2 weeks ago. It seems they already knew I am a lesbian and I was hopping and singing all the time and my mum was thinking things. Where did you met her, on the internet...? she was all the time fishing out where I was up to, and so on. And that was not a very nice situation. Finally they wanted a talk with me. I avoid my mother all the time. Similair as your situation, they had a feeling about my orientation and I had to tell it. I denied all the time, but they didn't believe me.
I suggest you to tell them the truth. I felt a lot better afterwards.
Good luck!!
2007-01-07 21:27:00 · answer #6 · answered by frenzie-ann 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm a girl and its perfectly fine to be gay but I dont suggest being so open anout it and no most guys dont wear thongs and dont sag them for people to see it make you a laughing stock to the whole school
2016-05-23 04:05:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not ashamed then why did you deny it to your mom, the hardest thing for her was to hear it from someone else and then for you to deny it to her face. Be truthful, tell her and you will find she will accept you for who you are. Your not telling her because you think she will cut off your funding, makes you a very selfish person especially as now all she has is embarassement, because you can bet the friend who outed you is not stopping with just telling your mom.
Tell your mom, be proud and then the truth can't hurt your mom. The deception and lying will permanently damage your relationship and she will never trust you again.
2007-01-07 07:33:30 · answer #8 · answered by rndmacts 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
be your self tell them how you feel they cant change your mind for you life is about makeing mistakes but you kno god will forgive you in the end and lets face it i love gay people but im not gay and i get picked on every day of my life you kno what i meen juss hear what they have to say about if you want to telll them and see what happens form their and if they really have that big of a deal with it then seek some ok hun?
2007-01-07 08:03:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely get your mom to a support group for friends and family, like PFLAG. Talk to her about what problems she's having with your sexuality and talk about that. Work her through it. It is possible to win a parent's acceptance.
2007-01-07 15:30:54 · answer #10 · answered by carora13 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
trust i know how you feel... one this one all i have to say is when you get the confidence to come out just do it for right now jus concentrate on your school work and other things....If you need support I'm sure school has groups for that or if you have some gay friends talk to them about it.
2007-01-07 08:38:20 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋