Baby is due any day now and my bf of 4 years still hiding baby from his family, not moved in with me or contributed towards anything for the baby, yet he wants to be at the birth? I dont want to be with him ive had enough, im skint got bills coming out of my nose but i need to stay focused. Im going to see a solicitor tomorrow and the C.A.B about my finanices. I am lonely in this strange town so thats why I keep letting him walk all over me. What can I do, thats realistic? This is so not me I have changed so much over the past 4 years even lost friends because they dont like him. I am very angry and bitter at this situation ive allowed myself to be in. I just need to find the key to get me out, then I will be fine and able to enjoy my bundle of joy.
2007-01-07 06:41:39 · 8 answers · asked by Lisa 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
HE'S 39 AND IM 37
2007-01-07 06:42:09 · update #1
focus on the baby...do not allow him in the delivery room...tell the hospital people that you do not want him visiting or near the baby...do not let him sign the birth certificate and give the baby your name.....you do not need to be with someone who is ashamed of you and the baby and not supporting you...he is a total jerk and you deserve better.....good luck
2007-01-07 06:45:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when I started reading this I thought you must be very young until I worked out that that you and your boyfriend are both mature. How can a 39 year old not want to tell his family that you're going to have his baby? What do you think tells you about him? Go to the CAB and see what they can suggest to help you pay your bills. Maybe you'll be allowed to claim extra money to help you with your expenses. Forget about him. If I were you I wouldn't even let him attend the birth since he's not helping with the bills and is reluctant to tell his family about this baby. Focus on yourself and the baby and move forward. Try to get back in touch with your friends.
2007-01-07 06:54:59 · answer #2 · answered by whitney 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I'm 37. Second, you both are TOO OLD for this game. He still hasn't told his family? Why? It isn't like he has to live under their roof? Could he be married all this time and just not have told you? Could his wife be just as naive as you? I don't mean to be harsh, but when I had my first child at 22, my bf did the exact same thing...only the child wasn't his. We got together just after I got pregnant and my daughter's father left me. As for you, maybe you can call on family or friends from where you grew up and see if they can take you in. This is just not the time for you to be going through this. Being the mother of four children, one can be as draining as four. Good luck in finding a better way, and take it from me, it DOES get easier and better. Try to have a good one, and God bless you and your little bundle on the way.
2007-01-07 06:52:36 · answer #3 · answered by momofatsc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may be hiding the idea of his child away from his family, however that is up to him, and only he can decide when the time is right to tell his family about the child. It is entirely up to you on how your relationship works out. If you both want it so bad you will both work at it and it will work for you, however if one or both of you do not feel the same, then this has to end! Get him out of your life, and just communicate with him about your child! Don't cut him out of the childs life!
2007-01-07 06:47:46 · answer #4 · answered by James 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart ,you are doing the right thing by seeing CAB and a solicitor ,just stay strong for your baby ,there won't be time for this low life bloke after the birth .All good wishes to you and your child x
2007-01-07 06:47:05 · answer #5 · answered by Rosie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay so you made a mistake....nothing to do about it now. Have your baby and enjoy the years you shall reap, but now as for the Father, he needs to get his act in gear and from the way you described him, it doesn't make you look good that you laid down with this idiot.
2007-01-07 06:45:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you know what you need to do. Get rid of him and concentrate on your baby. He/she needs you. If he hasn't grown up yet, that's his problem. You have a baby to raise, by yourself. You don't need to raise another.
2007-01-07 06:46:07 · answer #7 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you got family ask them for help its wot they there for. be strong and you'll get thru. try your doctor they may kno of single parent groups in your area you'll be able to draw alot of strength from and get new friends.
2007-01-07 06:47:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋