My names Matt, and I am 16 years old. I was adopted by my grandmother when I was about 4 years old. My father was an alcoholic and my mother was really bad into drugs, so therefore my grandmother took me in. I lived in PA for a long time, then about 2 years ago, she moved me down here to Tennessee. I hate this place with a passion. I've been talking to my Dad, and I have decided that I want to move in with him in PA. Well, my grandmother doesn't care for the idea, but she agreed. Then, a few days ago, spazzed out and said no and gave me a huge lecture. I still want to live there, reguardless. So if anyone has any information on where I want to live and who I want to live with, please help. Is there any legal actions to be taken that will help me out? Please, someone help me out, I don't really have anyone to really talk to about all this, so any suggestions or input would be incredible. Thank you.
2007-01-07 05:59:46 · 12 answers · asked by Matt H 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
your grandmother is your legal guardian. In order to go live with your father, he has to file custody disputes in the state of Tennessee. He will most likely not do this because of the cost and effort.
Your best bet is to convince your grandmother that this would be the best thing for you and to get your dad to help you do this. If your dad hasn't cleaned up his act, there is no amount of convincing that can help you.
For all legal purposes, your grandmother IS your parent. She has complete dominion over you. It is actually illegal for you to go to PA without her consent and your father could even be put in prison.
You may emancipate yourself at the age of emancipation, which is 18 or upon high school graduation in TN.
My suggestion would be to work your **** off in that Tennessee school and then apply to Pitt, Penn State, Millersville, Temple, Villanova, West Chester and every other of our some 50 colleges. You may also try to get involved with some summer program where you volunteer in PA. Conveniently, this project happens to be in the same town as your dad.
It sucks, I know. I moved to a hic town when I was 16 too. As soon as I graduated, I was out of there and haven't been back. Didn't even do a graduation photo. Bummer, but unfortunately the remedies are more along the lines of convincing arguments that will not relent.
2007-01-07 06:20:21 · answer #1 · answered by Discipulo legis, quis cogitat? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Matt, your grandmother adopted you, therefore, she has all legal custodial rights and both of your parents would have had to give up their parental rights in order for the adoption to go through. I agree with a previous response that you finish high school there in Tennessee and consider college in PA. I'd also recommend that you keep the conversation lines open with your dad. If he's turned his life around, then there are many things you can learn from his bad experiences.
Best of luck
2007-01-07 07:19:34 · answer #2 · answered by mike w 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Matt, try and grow up a little bit. What is the matter with Tennessee? Is it just the place you hate? Is this how you are going to handle a crisis in your adult life, run away. You only have two more years, I know it seems like a long time but believe me it is not. Do you have the full two years or is it just a year and some months? What makes you think life with your Dad is not going to be worse than life in Tennessee?
2007-01-07 06:17:45 · answer #3 · answered by firewomen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, is your dad off the sauce or is he still drinking? Has he turned his life around? Can he be a responsible parent? These are the things your grandmother is thinking about. You can contact your local Department of Children and Family's and find out the laws and/or legal way to go about this. However if this matter goes to court the judge will be asking the same questions I asked above. They will be looking for what is in your best interest, but I can tell you right now it will probably be with your grandmother.
2007-01-07 06:13:14 · answer #4 · answered by AzzGoodAzzItGetz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Matt-Before you decide to move in with Dad,Think hard!Your grandmother loves you incredably!Im sure she only wants whats best for you.
I also know what its like to live in a place you dont like.I grew up in a navy family and moved alot.It wasnt easy.But I adjusted.
I also know a thing or two about alcoholism and drug abuse.I am a recovering alcoholic, I have a son whose name is also Matt,hes 23 now.I can tell you it wasnt easy for him having both a mom and dad who drank most of the time.Alot of yelling and screaming going on in our home.Not a fun time for Matt.He was 5 when I got sober and clean,but his dad continued.It wasnt a pretty picture!!
So Matt before you decide on this move----Is your dad clean and sober today???I would suggest you look in your phone book and see if you can find alateen or alanon.Go to a few meetings,and just listen to what they have to say about what its really like living with an alcoholic.Its no picnic,believe me.
What ever you decide to do,I wish you well!!!!! Dont ever forget your grandmothers LOVE!!!!!
2007-01-07 09:13:22 · answer #5 · answered by reikigirl8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at 14 you can choose, BUT, it sounds like your grandma, might know something you don't ....is your dad still drinking?...remember, she took you in when you didn't have any other place to go...she loves you, you know that.
It is hard to say what to do cause you only gave a few details, If your dad is still on the bottle, trust me, you would hate that more, maybe you just have not had time to adjust yet...there is no great rush, take your time and think...maybe a guidance couns. at school could help you out here...goood luck...she had you for 12 yrs....she won't give up with out a fight and I am not sure she should...
2007-01-07 06:10:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most courts are willing to reunite a child with their biological parent, but it depends on certain factors such as court orders, treatment, and safety. If your father hasn't demonstrated that he is now a responsible parent, chances are you won't get to leave. If he has quit drinking, has gone through treatment, etc, you have a shot. They may require you to start with visitations and work from there. Keep in mind, in 2 years you can legally go where ever you want.
2007-01-07 06:07:15 · answer #7 · answered by HG 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i might could desire to declare no. Being a Christian with Buddhist inclinations, I doubt i might experience gentle under the rule of thumb of fundamentalist Christians. regrettably, many misread the Bible and use it to sell hate and prejudice and concern. Love and tolerance and mushy kindness are no longer priorities among many "Christians." If Christ himself have been in cost, then issues may be very cool and individuals may be expected to handle one yet another kindly and help those much less fortunate than ourselves. The regulations may be utilized equitably to all; there may be NO profiling! There may be no tolerance for people and massive businesses who thieve from the individuals. God do in comparison to grotesque!!!! yet Christ isn't right here to rule, so nix on the theocracy.
2016-11-27 02:03:18 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should talk to each of them about maybe living with a friend in PA that way your not around all the alcohol.
2007-01-07 06:06:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your #1 priority should be your education, in a short year you can graduate and go attend college in PA.
Don't be in such a rush to make a foolish move now!
2007-01-07 06:10:16 · answer #10 · answered by government slave 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋