My wife and I agreed on a 6 month separation because of my addictive behavior (porn). We are in month 4 and I very much want to move back in the house with her and my almost 4-year old son. I love them both so much and I know they love me. Lately, my wife has been distant - I don't know if she's waiting to see how I do or if she's decided to get a divorce. I am in therapy and go to group 12-step meetings. I want it to work and am willing to continue doing what I can to change. Has anyone else ever been separated for this long and did it help or hurt your chances for a successful marraige? Thanks.
2007-01-07 02:25:26 · 6 answers · asked by Professor Mystery 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My parents were seperated for 4 years and have been married since 1968. Yes they are still together, but they are not happy. Ask your wife how she feels about the seperation. Porn isnt excatly something to be seperated over..I would seperate if he had a addictive CHEATING behavior (actually divorce). I think the problem lies deeper then that. Just see if you can talk it out and see where you are and what you expect out of the relationship. Some people seperate because they really want a divorce but dont know how to bring it about.
2007-01-07 02:33:21 · answer #1 · answered by Jene 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, my husband and I. We were sep. 2x first time for 7 months ( I got a apartment, and a night job, and took care of my 1yr son) ( I did not get any help from him, so you might want to make sure you help her financially in case you do split, the lawyers can come back and say this and that then.) We got back together, then last yr we had another (sml) break of 2 months. Keep up the therapy, that is so very important, but she should go to a therapist also. BTW we have been married for 7 yrs and known each other for 10, have a 4.5 yr child. About the porn,,,um,,I am not sure what you mean by addicted...I know that I look,,my husband does, my father all of the time and it does not affect the relationship. You either mean you are on it 6hrs a day or your wife has some image problems.
2007-01-07 02:33:48 · answer #2 · answered by cateyes 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can choose to do anything good or bad. Porn is not a good thing. It makes sex smutty and dirty and is not what God ordained it to be. The bible says God made sex and he made it beautiful. All porn does is entertain things like lust and perversity.
Read the book LOVE AND RESPECT by DR EMERSON EGGERICHS. If your wife means something to you as I can see she does the respect what she asks and love her UNCONDITIONALLY that way you will gain all the respect from her that you desire. Wake up and choose what is right and override the negative feelings and emotions. If you have friends giving you this stuff to read my suggestion is you dump them too because they are actually causing more trouble than good. Take your thoughts captive. Wash out the dirt bin in your mind and fill it with pure thoughts. THink positively and not negatively.
2007-01-07 02:34:51 · answer #3 · answered by uniquechild 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The separation happened for a reason. So being open and honest to me is your only chance. It's sad that children are involved with our errors when made. We've all been there. you are one of Trillions, Trilions. Stay in therapy and believe and know which ever way it goes, it will work out. Remember you can't be the only one either with kids it takes two.
2007-01-07 02:33:39 · answer #4 · answered by Bren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope not me
2007-01-07 02:28:12 · answer #5 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
choices..........they are all up to you.
2007-01-07 02:41:44 · answer #6 · answered by sweet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋