So... abstinence , right or wrong??

Question

Wait til marraige?? Or not??

Answer 1

SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE—WHY NOT?

Sexual desire and capacity normally awaken and grow during the teen-age years. So throughout history many young persons have had sexual intercourse before marriage. But in recent years premarital sex has become increasingly common. In some places it is almost the general rule. Why?

One reason for the increase in premarital sex relates to the publicity given to sex in motion pictures and popular novels. Many young persons are curious, they ‘want to see what it is like.’ This, in turn, creates peer pressure and influences others to conform. As sex before marriage and sex without marriage have become widespread, many clergymen now say that it is permissible as long as the parties ‘love each other.’ More and more unmarried persons thus face the question, ‘Why not have sex, especially if we use birth control?’

Medical columnist Dr. Saul Kapel listed other reasons behind premarital sex, and made observations as to the effects:

‘Sex is misused as a means of rebellion against parents. It is misused to attract attention, as a kind of “call for help.” It is misused as a way of “proving” masculinity or femininity. It is misused as a social crutch in vain attempts to gain acceptance.

‘When sex is thus misused, it never solves the problems that motivate it. Usually, it only obscures them.’

No matter what the reason for premarital sex, no matter how common it is, no matter how many counselors and clergymen approve of it, the Bible advises:

“This is what God wills, . . . that you abstain from fornication; . . . that no one go to the point of harming and encroach upon the rights of” another.—1 Thessalonians 4:3-6.

Some may feel that God is here being needlessly restrictive. But do not forget that sex itself is a gift from God; he is the One who created humans with reproductive powers. Is it not logical that the Author of human sexuality should be able to provide the best counsel on it, advice that can actually safeguard us against grief?

EFFECTS—PLEASURABLE OR PAINFUL?

Sexual attraction and desire can, in the right setting, have fine effects. One, of course, is children. In a family, resulting children can be a source of real happiness. What, though, if sex relations are engaged in by persons not yet married? The effect often is the same—pregnancy and children.

Many who share in premarital sex relations feel that this need not be a serious concern. They have in mind available contraceptives. In some places teen-agers may obtain these even without their parents’ learning of it. Nonetheless, teenage pregnancies abound even among sophisticated youths, who say, “It couldn’t happen to me.” News reports such as these prove it:

“More than one baby in every five born in New Zealand last year was born to an unmarried parent.”

“Of every three British women under 20 reciting her marriage vows, one is already an expectant mother.”

“One out of five teenage girls [in the U.S.A.] will become pregnant before she graduates from high school.”

This painful effect of sex before marriage has brought pressure on many young women and young men. Some seek abortion. Yet sensitive persons become severely disturbed at the thought of destroying a child that is developing within its mother. Feminine emotions and conscience are also involved. These are so powerful that many who have permitted an abortion have later regretted it deeply.

Teen-age pregnancies bring greater risks to mother and child than do pregnancies of adult women. There is a greater risk of anemia, toxemia, abnormal bleeding, prolonged labor and forced delivery, as well as death during delivery. A baby born to a mother under age 16 is twice as likely to die in its first year. Illegitimate births also bring the parents many personal, social and economic problems. Furthermore, a child’s security and development depend to a great extent on a stable home environment. Children deprived of that by illegitimacy may be seriously hurt for life. Would you say, then, that the overall effects of premarital sex are pleasurable or painful? And is the Bible’s advice, “Abstain from fornication,” a wise protection?

Ignoring the Bible’s advice has also exposed many to another painful effect—disease. Women who began their sex life in their teens with multiple partners have a much higher rate of cervical cancer. There is, too, the very real danger of venereal disease. Some persons deceive themselves by thinking that gonorrhea and syphilis can easily be detected and cured. But experts of the U.N. World Health Organization report that some venereal disease strains now are resistant to antibiotics. Doctors worry, also, about the upsurge in genital herpes. It often harms children born to infected women. Yes, many young persons are learning to their sorrow the truthfulness of the Bible’s warning:

“Every other sin that a man may commit is outside his body, but he that practices fornication is sinning against his own body.”—1 Corinthians 6:18.

Some think that premarital sex provides experience that can make for easier sexual adjustment in marriage. It is common in some lands for wealthy fathers to take their sons to prostitutes for “education.” Persons may feel that this is helpful. But it really is not, according to our Creator, who has observed all human experience. Maintaining chastity beforehand lays a far better groundwork for a happy marriage. Canadian studies disclosed that teen-agers who had early premarital sex are more likely to cheat on their mates when once married. But persons who maintain chastity beforehand are more likely to be chaste in marriage; the respect and honor for marriage they had before the wedding day continue after it.

Answer 2

I think staying abstinent is a very good idea. I think you are on the right path and shouldn't let anyone make you think otherwise. If you want to get married a virgin I applaud you because not many do so nowadays. Keep living your life and doing the things that are best for you at the moment such as getting a good education and not worrying about sex or anything else. I wish you all the best and remember dont worry about what others may think or say follow your dreams and do what you believe is right for you.

Answer 3

There's no reason to wait for marriage except for two possible reasons:

1. Deep down, you simply want to wait and you don't wanna have a laundry list of guys you've had sex with before you find "the one".

2. You might have been arrested by the abstinence police and brainwashed into believing that premarital sex is wrong. It absolutely is not.

If items 1 and 2 don't apply to you, then why wait? Go for it and enjoy.

Answer 4

You shouldn't ask anyone this it's more about what you fell and want to do if you wanna wait then wait if not then don't...Well I would always tell my future kids to wait until there married to have sex because it's the right thing to do and they would have a better chance of NOT catching any dieases...

Answer 5

People who depend on abstinence only to prevent pregnancy have not made preparations for weak or intense moments, and often become parents without wanting to.
As for the choice, that is up to you, but only become a parent when you choose to.

Answer 6

It depends - are you religious, will you be guilty? Do you want to have a special bond with your partner that you have never been with anyone else? Or do you want to experience sex with number of people first and wont feel guilty? It depends on a lot of factors - as once its done you cant go back!

Answer 7

Abstain because you want to...not because you want to wait til marriage. Just because you're married doesn't make sex any better or wrong if you're not.

Answer 8

I would wait till marriage. Sex is nothing huge. Infact sex has caused more problems in marriage then the marriage itself.

Answer 9

lol...and if u wait till marriage and the guy sucks in bed u divorce him? com' on,,,have sex, enjoy sex before and after the marriage..cause when u'll be 50 u'll have no time or mood 4 it :)

Answer 10

If you are a teenager, wait until you are older.
If you are older, why are you so up tight?

Answer 11

if you have gone this long why not wait a little longer