2007-01-06 22:40:49 · 14 answers · asked by MICHAEL G 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
way to be unkind sorry missed out the be
2007-01-06 22:42:07 · update #1
Not all of us do
2007-01-07 00:59:43 · answer #1 · answered by screaming frenzy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most people don't really go out of their way to be unkind - it is more usually unconscious and is more about the person being unkind than the one on the receiving end.
2007-01-08 06:13:12 · answer #2 · answered by LillyB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mayeb we dont all want to be happy maybe some people would rather have power over others.
I think unkindness comes from unacknowledged vulnerability and disappointment with life. Also a way to power and trying to pass the misery around - not being able to hold it.
Transactional Analysis theorists say that we pass bad messages introjected from others around like hot potatoes trying to get rid of them. To really get rid of them it is necessary to own them and face them and this is a lot of hard work to expect people to do if they have the shorter way of just throwing it on to the next person like getting rid of the rubbish by fly tipping.
Unkind people are rarely confronted because they can just go ahead and hurt you more so they never get a reason to change.
I am practising confronting people in a mild way. At Christmas a shop assistant was really snarky to me and I said in a neutral voice that if he didn't treat me better I would walk out from the purchase and go elsewhere.He blustered but it was effective and has given me confidence not to accept unkindnesses.
I think staying neutral is the key and not getting into the ring with them.
2007-01-07 08:38:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right or wrong, there is a worry that the resources of the world cannot be shared equally and satisfactorily. Which accounts for our grab culture and competetiveness and which breeds mistrust. Being unkind reflects both our fraustration within this culture and our engagement with the inherent dynamic. On one hand, we must be hard, pragmatic, resolved, self-focused to get ahead or even to keep our place. On the other hand, we must watch out for other self-focused people. The moral deception of society is that it covers this predatory culture with civility and social rhetoric. In reality, we do not want anyone else to be happy if we cannot be and we do not want anyone else to be happy if their happiness undermines our own. That is the true nature of our modern culture
2007-01-09 18:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by Elder 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice one.
yes we do all want to be happy, even if that means being unkind to others, unfortunately. it's a selfish nature that puts itself before everyone else, but we don't always act that way.
sometimes we'll put the wishes of friends or family before our own; but, when it comes to a complete stranger ? nobody can be blamed for being cautious, especially these days. i think many of the unkind acts may just be misinterpretations. it can be a well dodgy world out there and we all have to look out for ourselves, don't we. that's human nature.
2007-01-08 04:13:17 · answer #5 · answered by nessie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those who go out of their way to be unkind ? Insecurity of the heart and them not having healed and / or move on and forward in their lifes.
While I am compassionate . . . I've learned not to make their thing my thing.
2007-01-07 15:25:16 · answer #6 · answered by onelight 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that the problem comes down to Ego. Instead of looking at it from an us and them perspective, people need to realize that we are all truly one. In the unkind reaction there is a deeper suffering in the person who reacts that way. Each of us wants to be safe, each of us wants to have mental and physical well-being, each of us wants to be at peace, each of us wants love, each of us wants to be Happy. Anger begets anger... love begets love. Sometimes I think we learn the most from individuals we call our enemies. If we can understand their suffering at that moment, have compassion, the anger stops there.
2007-01-07 06:58:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a really good question. To project our own unhappiness onto others perhaps? We can't be happy so why should others be?
Have you ever seen the film 'Pay It Forward'? I loved that idea.
2007-01-07 10:56:05 · answer #8 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I often wonder about this, I think most people only look out for number one and are therefore so wrapped up in themselves they don't think. Alternatively there are some pretty nasty people out there who get their kicks from being mean.
2007-01-07 06:51:22 · answer #9 · answered by charlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's in our Human Behaviour to treat each other badly.
2007-01-10 07:36:37 · answer #10 · answered by manc1999 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard day at work, missed their train home, pet just died, in big debt, headache and then bang!!! you accidentally step on their toe.....
2007-01-07 11:57:59 · answer #11 · answered by lulu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋