I am very high matenience and have been very selfish lately. My husband is soooo nice and he lets me get away with it alot. But even he has his limits and I feel really bad. He believes I don't appreciate what he does for me and our 2 children (2 yr old and a 6 month old).
The reason why he is picking up so much slack is b/c I am suffering from post-partun depression. Our 6 month old is not sleeping through the night. I am exhausted. On top of htat, right now, my 2 yr old has pnuemonia, my 6 month old has bronchitis and I have bronchitis/border-line pneumonia. Now my husband is getting sick too as he has been staying up all night with the baby so I can get sleep.
And I am so grumpy with him and expect him to do everything for me! So evil.
So, what can I do for him that would show my appreciation? No sex stuff...I am sick. And we have little money to spare right now.
THe obvious answer is to change my attitude and I am trying. What else could I do? Some grand gesture?
2007-01-06 19:37:52 · 16 answers · asked by Kate A 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow, so much is going on in your family that you should give your husband a great big hug for putting up with you too! (smile)
The best way to appreciate your husband is by telling how much you appreciate him on the things that he does to keep up with the family and finances....everything even the little things he does!
I sure hope you are taking some kind of medication for your depression too. Having sick children can wear you out at times, but you need to be strong to keep up with them and your husband. You both need to help eachother out like take turns with the kids in their care. Now that your husband is sick, let him also get some rest too. He can sure use it!
Stop being so grumpy with him. Start changing your attitude too. You shouldn't say that you are trying, because your not trying, otherwise you wouldn't put up these questions here! He is your husband so treat him like one. He deserves to be treated good for all the things he's done for you and the kids.
Another thing you can do to show his appreciation is sit him down so he can relax and give him a shoulder and neck rub. It will only take a few minutes. Can you spare a few minutes? When you start feeling better, give him a foot massage. My husband enjoys that before going to bed, it even puts him to sleep! (smile) It is all about attitude and showing respect to eachother. It is all about giving!
Last but not least, always, always, tell him you love him each day!(smile)
2007-01-06 19:55:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are too tired and ill to make "a grand gesture." If you are suffering from post-partum depression, talk to your doctor about medication which will improve your mood and this, in itself, will benefit your husband. This all sound like the awful but normal stress of dealing with sick new babies and young children. Keep telling him you love him and that you know he is a wonderful man and that you are sorry for the times you expect too much. You are not evil, just overwhelmed. This will all pass.
2007-01-06 19:48:21 · answer #2 · answered by jom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand why you are so stressed out. I also have children and have been happily married. I remember when I first met my husband, which amazing was 13 and he was 15, I acted slightly pushy. But that compares to nothing you are going through. Try to tell him that you are sorry and tell him everything that you just said now. I don't know why you are telling me this, you should tell him this. Also tell him that you appreciate it all and that you are trying to change your attitude but you are very stressed out. Just try to talk to him and give him a hug and make sure you tell him you love him. It will make him feel greatly appreciated.
I hope this helps and I will be praying for your family. I hope things work out.
2007-01-06 19:44:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow u have alot going on i think with all that it would make some problems with even the best couples. one thing u did say was, "no sex" being a guy if he wants sex and u r saying no could make him feel unappreciated. i think by u changing ur attitude will make a big difference. sounds like u r doing just as much as he is so maybe he could change his attutide. good luck
2007-01-06 21:06:27 · answer #4 · answered by holdnnmyown 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know anyone who can watch the children for a few hours. Maybe the two of you can just lay in bed and sleep for awhile. You might start feeling better if you both get some good sleep. Hope you feel better soon. = )
2007-01-06 19:42:22 · answer #5 · answered by Chicago Girl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to be mean but I'd say get over your post partum depression by taking some meds or just get the whole idea out of your head. Then, help your husband by not being selfish. First of all, get the kids all better!! And, don't be selfish!!! It's just an excuse!
2007-01-06 19:49:43 · answer #6 · answered by marincaligirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him how much you love and appreciate him. And let him know when everyone is feeling better you're going treat him to a great night of sex, food, or maybe him going out with his buddies and you not being selfish about it. Let him know he's loved and appreciated!!
2007-01-06 19:44:42 · answer #7 · answered by one_daytripper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious that you DO appreciate him, just make sure you let him know.
Get a babysitter and take him out to a local comedy club.
You need to LAUGH together again!
2007-01-06 19:48:44 · answer #8 · answered by anthrotistic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all realize your situation is temporary. When you are all feeling better tell him how much you appreciate him.
It is great that you are trying, that in itself is a grand gesture.
2007-01-06 19:42:27 · answer #9 · answered by reddemonwi55 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read the proper care and feeding of a husband get it at the library
2007-01-06 19:41:57 · answer #10 · answered by Hawkeye77 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋