how do i tell my husband,im not satisfied?

Question

i dont want to put him down.but he dont do it for me,anymore.he is now a sloppy kisser,sex is terrible.how can i get hot steamy sex,out of this guy?i just noticed,im not atracted to him anymore.before,all it took was for me to see him naked,now thats just nothing.am i falling out of love and dont know it? i feel that i love him,but im confused.

Answer 1

Have your eyes been wondering.....

Have you been with someone else already?

Reflect back on the days when you used to be so much into your husband. Think about all fun times you used to have. Now that you are smiling while thinking about this, why not do the same things you did when you first fell for him?

Focus on the good times. And watch your feelings begin to thrive. Think about the bad things and watch how you start to feel so turned off.

If he is not satisfying you anymore, then it's time for you to kindly and in a fun way, show him how you want it done. Let him know what pleases you. You'll have to make him feel special and he will naturally want to be the one to please him. But if you tear him down, you will chase him away.

But if your feelings for your husband are all gone... you will need to seek counseling.

Good luck

Answer 2

You don't have to "put him down", just be honest with him. After all, if you can't be honest with your husband...then you married the wrong man.

Be honest with him and just tell him it's just not working for you. Honestly, what have you got to lose, more bad sex?

Tell him you need something more and you want to try new things. Go get some toys, or some flicks, or some dirty books. Chances are he will be all over it.

Maybe he's just not all that into you anymore either. It happens. Marriage is something that you have to work on everyday...and not take for granted, but sometimes we forget the "work" part because it's so routine. Maybe it's your surroundings...go away together for the weekend.

Someone else mentioned that sex is not the only important thing in a marriage, which is true, but it does play a very important part. Sex satisfies not just physical needs, but emotional needs as well. If your needs (either physical or emotional) aren't being satisfied, then you aren't going to be a very nice person to be around either!

If you are honest, and tell him you need to spice it up, and you try, and it still doesn't happen for you, then at least you gave it (and him) a shot, and need to realize that maybe you are with the wrong man. Can you picture your life without him? If so, cut your loses and move on.

You say you love him, so give him the opportunity to help fix what is lacking in your lovemaking. Maybe he feels the same way. At this point, it doesn't sound like you have much to lose by talking to him about it and being honest.

Good luck either way.

Answer 3

If you don't like the way he kisses show him what you like ask him to kiss you the way you kiss him. Men get lazy if you don't help them stay sharp. Tell him what you want in bed but don't be a *itch about it. Put his hand where you want it get on top add some spice get freaky leave him some love coupons that 'offer' the things you like. I don't know how long you've been married or if other issues are the cause but I know he can't know he's slipping if you don't tell him. Let him know if he calls a cat to eat he damn well better feed it.

Answer 4

Sounds to me as if you have equated lust with love and are now learning the effects. It is quite evident that your marriage was basedon lust...that's the problem with getting too involved intimately in a relationship too early on. It ususually does cause confusion. Now your stuck. Unless you decide to cheat on your marriage then you'll be an adulteress...You have some decisions to make.

Answer 5

do you not love him or are you just board with the sex? Big difference there.

I'd suggest a bit of mutual reading. There are great bks of erotica or on different sex techniques. Pick out a few and suggest acting out an erotic scene or experimenting with new techniques. Make the suggestion outside of the bedroom and phrase it in terms of possibilities not inadequacies.

Answer 6

there's a hell of a lot more to love than sex
but one thing you coulddo is have some wine beforehand, and see if that works
if it doesn't, than you need to start having a very long talk with him abnout your libito and what turns you on
make him work for it
make him earn it
i think that's what your body needs
if he makes a step in a good direction, give him a reward
like scream a little louder
or moan a little deeper
encourage him
tell him what you want him to do to you

Answer 7

You find a time to talk to him and you tell him. Before you do that, you need to be sure what it is you want--he needs to know that as well. You should also be prepared in case he tells you you're not what he wants anymore either. He will either improve, or he won't. You need to decide what your next course of action will be in either case. Do not keep this to yourself. Life is too short to waste it with someone you don't love. Took me 8 years to realize that.

Answer 8

Try something different maby your just in a rut. if you dont like something try to suggest someting different or try it this way. Men arent perfect and we do something for so long we think its right. Some constructive critisim wouldnt hurt. Dont be afraid to open up to him. and he might open up to you more and help alot. Do something that drives him wild. not just sex act. but how you act or something you do around the house. I know with me its the little things that help.

Answer 9

Just tell him that you are not having fun...think of something exciting to spice up your sex life
look it up on the internet plenty of sexy or kinky ideas, depends on what u r looking for.

Trust me your hubby won't mind as long as you tell him how to go about and what pleases you

Answer 10

Lust dies. It's common. Tell him to mix it up a little, but you have to put in an effort too.