I have been in a relationship for 10yrs. I have 3 children (boys) I love my family alot but my family hates my sons father. He is not supportive to me in anyway we sleep in different rooms we never go out to mingle together he does not help me finacially, mentally, sexualy, spiritually.He was good with the kids until i realized he was not helping with raising 3 strong men in this day and age! My children are 8 & twins 5. Children really learn what they see. Mommy does everything from fixing bikes to throwing the football in the house! I have asked this person to leave because I want better for myself and my children. Why should I have to uproot my family to get away when the love is not their? He constanly tries to put my character actions and beliefs down. I am to the point that I hate this person. The only thing when he is gone I miss him Sounds a little crazy but this is true! I really need advice on getting him away from me anyone with the same situation with good advice please !
2007-01-06 18:12:54 · 8 answers · asked by ljjmjd3 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think in your heart you know what is best.
We all have to respect ourselves and take the path our inner knowing tells us - problem is that all to often we go against our gut feelings. The heart can play tricks on our minds.
You need to do what you feel deep inside is going to be best for YOU and THE KIDS. Trust yourself. One thing is for sure, hard times or difficult times always seem to get better as long as we are trying to make them better.
2007-01-06 18:23:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not there now but I have lived (in some ways) the way you are. I hated the man I was married to and (sorry to admit) would visualize just blowing him away. I know that is bad...but it is true.
Why should he just leave sounds like he's got it made. You handle everything and he gets to sit on his butt.
No wonder your family is not so crazy about him.
Yes you will miss him ...he has been there under foot for 10 years....
I suspect you felt something for him at some point, and he is the father of your children.
You will have to file for divorce and have the local law enforcement remove him.
Not easy but what your going through isn't easy ether.
Trust me get about 3 months under your belt without him and you will wonder why in heavens name didn't I do this a long time ago.
2007-01-07 02:23:48 · answer #2 · answered by Jan J 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"He was good with the kids until i realized he was not helping with raising 3 strong men in this day and age! " I don't understand how a parent can be good with the children yet not help with raising them, and why did it take you so long to "realize" it? I mean you have THREE children by this man! If it was so bad then WHY did you stick around after the first one to make two more? YOU are just as responsible for creating this mess as he is.
2007-01-07 02:20:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
im sorry,but why u are living with this person?its so clear he does nothing to help u,more than this,he treat u so bad.and on top of this he is so bad father,he dont do anything 4 his kids but to give them a verry wrong life-model.my advice is to throw him out and start live ur life.maybe ull find a man who realy apriciate u as u deserve and take care of ur kids.dont keep him in ur home another day
2007-01-07 08:38:27 · answer #4 · answered by simona 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my mom was in the same situation, only he was my step dad.
he stole jewlary from her, stole money from my grandma & my mom, cheated her insurance company & was verryyyy creepy. to me anyways. & he left out the part that his 'clubs' he owned were 'strip' clubs.
i remember he wouldnt take my mom to the doctor & i would watch her get sicker & sicker. i remember she had to be put on so much drungs she slept threw my brithday. & 'he' made dinner.
which was discusting.
anyways my point is, i dont think your boys should see you go threw such a hard time. i think you should talk to your boys & ask them how they feel about their father (even though there most-likey going to say they love him the same as you)
my mom wasnt strong enough to kick him out herself, so i had to do it. by (safely & secretly) screaming "if he says then im leaving." then i ran out the door & into my moms best friends car.
we ended up moving 4 states away because of it he was such a horrible man, & she wanted a fresh start.
its horrible & i dont think you should move at all & make it clear your doing the work & paying the bills, your raising the boys & you kicking him out.
sorry you not hearing this from an adult, im only 15. & even though i dont know you, i dont want you to end up like my mom, sick on a couch & moving out of state.
so good luck & i hope everything turns out smoothly.
2007-01-07 02:30:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's like a bad habit! ya aren't most of them though? Women in general don't NEED MEN! we have proven that time and time again. But on the other hand, what you do need is Love, security, and emotional support. And if you think about it, YOUR NOT EVEN GETTING THAT FROM YOUR MAN! So you have to KICK THAT BAD HABIT! because it's not doing anything but bringing you down!
2007-01-07 02:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by SecretFriend 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to get out and start living your life. It also sounds like the only reason you miss him when he leaves is you have gotten comfortable. get out and start over.
2007-01-07 02:21:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
That’s his home too. He doesn’t have to leave just because you ask him to. But if you’re unhappy then you can certainly leave.
2007-01-07 03:48:21 · answer #8 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋