who to believe wife or cousin?

Question

Who to believe wife or cousin?
almost a month ago today, rumors started going around that my wife slept with my cousin. when i confronted her about it, she lied to me about some things at first, but later on confessed those things but never confessed about seeping with him. she insists she is telling the truth and threatened suicide when i didnt believe her at first. my cousin that they in fact had sex and she sucked him off. my cousin also lied about this day in parts, but now he is insisting that he is telling the truth. me and my cousin were never really close and me and my wife had only been married for 5 months at the time. i am also in iraq and she was living with my mom at the time of all this happening. who should i believe and what should i do.

there are 2 children involved, both hers from previous men. both my cousin and my wife get very angry when i ask about it. neither of them want to talk about it and my wife thinks i should just forgive and go on.

Answer 1

Oh man, this is a tuff call.. maybe your wife doesn't think sucking off is actually having sex. Wasn't this debated while Clinton was in office!? ha.

You should give your wife another chance? for the kids sake. That's all I'm saying. Every one deserves a second chance. Some people just make stupid mistakes. And try to STOP DIGGING! no more asking your cousin or your wife who did what... your wife and your LOSER cousin (who needs enemies when you've got family like that?) will have to live with this for the rest of their life!

Try and work it out is all I can say try to go to counseling.

Answer 2

Why is your wife insisting that you "forgive and move on" ? Let her tell it she didn't do anything, so with that being said there is nothing to forgive. On the other hand, as I read between the lines (and you should too) she never confesses to sleeping or not sleeping with your cousin. It sounds like she did. You two do not have any kids together, drop her a**. She sounds like a lying manipulative...you know the rest. My other question is why is your cousin so adamant about putting that out there, that he and your wife had sex ? Is he trying to hurt you ? Even though he is family, family can be toxic and that is one person you need to stay away from. You have my sympathy that you have to deal with this nonsense while you are in Iraq, you have enough to deal with there. God Bless you. In short, divorce her and tell them both to kiss your a**. You can do better. Let them have each other, and get her and HER kids out your mother's house. I hope you did not put them on your benefits, because then you may have to be financially responsible for them. Good Luck.

Answer 3

If your really in Iraq, you should not have to be worrying about all this stuff at home. Sorry to tell you this, but I think the wife is lying her butt off. People uses the threat of killing them self to gain ground when they are covering a lie. Your cousin is no better. Your wife and cousin are not worth a plug nickel and you deserve a heck of a lot better than this. You need to tell your Mom to take the wife and her two kids to her own mothers house to live, To me there is a big toss up on here which is the worse human being, your wife or your cousin. Best thing you can do is, forget them both, get a divorce and find someone that really loves you and does not cheat on you. Those two are just low life's, and why keep yourself lowered to their level. OH!! one question for you, how the heck you have time to be here on this site and in Iraq, makes me wonder if your not a cheater also, like trying to make us think you have tons of time to be on the Internet, my Dad is a Major in Iraq right now, so guess what, I think your story has a lot of holes in it.

Answer 4

No man/woman in their right mind would threaten suicide
just for being confronted, 'unless' they are guilty or want to feel like the victim instead of the culprit.
What I'm saying is this: I believe your cousin!
If it weren't true, I really can't see why he would make up such a cruel story!
You say you guys were never really close but does that mean you were enemies, if you just weren't close I see no reason why he would fabricate such a lie.
And the reason they 'both' get mad is because they got caught!!
No one likes to be questioned when they've done something wrong.
Your wifes 'own' reaction to the whole thing tells me she's guilty.
Throwing a fit, threatening suicide, crying, etc.
These arn't 'normal' signs of innocense. On the contrary..

Answer 5

I personally think that she is trying to fool u. She probably knows that u r a sweet guy and she is taking advantage of that. U said she threaten u with suicide. Here is an idea. When she talks to u again about suicide, tell her to go suicide. Most probably she will just shut the hell up about suicide. If she actually goes suicide, stop her B4 she can do it and it could probably mean that she is telling the truth. As 4 who 2 believe(If she does not go suicide), believe neither. U know that they had sex and that is the only fact u need to know 4 now.

Answer 6

Man, this is a tough situation.

If someone is going to lie to you about something small, they'll lie to you about something big. You said they both lied to some extent, which mean neither of them can be trusted.

I doubt you're going to get the whole truth from either of these characters. The only thing you can do is make a decision on what you know to be true now. You're married to someone you cant trust and in my opinion, that would have to change.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Thank you for fighting for my (our) freedom. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 7

who has the extra useful reason to lie? My gut could say your cousin is telling the certainty. Your spouse will possibly no longer want to unfastened you, yet what does your cousin get out of it? Ask him to describe something approximately her bodily or overall performance clever that he could in uncomplicated terms understand from being together with her or seeing her bare. inspect. Use some concepts. learn up on the information superhighway a thank you to verify while somebody is mendacity. If are not getting everywhere, then the two settle for or call the Maury instruct! yet, the certainty that she threatens to dedicate suicide in case you do not have faith her exhibits she has some very severe matters that choose interest.

Answer 8

Of course they both get angry when confronted on the situation, they both did something terribly deceiving. Does it really matter to what extent their activities went? Either way, she cheated on you with a family member. They are both incredibly wrong in that aspect. Stop worrying about the lude details of their rendezvous, you will only feel more hurt and pain because of it. If you choose to forgive them, forgive and move along, you cannot dwell on it if you choose forgiveness. Personally, I cling to the idea that once a cheater, always a cheater, bes tof luck either way!

Answer 9

If she said to forgive and move on, then you have your answer. The question should be can you forgive her?? My hubby cheated on me before, sometimes people do stupid things. The once a cheat always a cheat rule doesn't apply to everyone. You need to have a serious talk with her and evaluate your relationship. Me and my hubby have been together for 5 years and married for 3 years now. Pray on it and follow your heart. Good luck I hope everything goes well for you and I also hope that you return home safely.

Answer 10

I think "2 kids , both from previous men" should answer the question. I won't even start telling you how trashy your wife is especially since you are defending my freedoms and life, thank you, you deserve better. this is all a bunch of crap you shouldn't have to worry about while you are away and can do nothing about it. let her commit suicide , as long as you have her on the insurance, encourage her to do so. whatever you do, don't adopt the kids and be beholding to them. you should forgive and go on, on to another life, this one will only pull you down into her trashy world.