I have had my children see a therepist but they are still angry my son is 9 and my daughter is 15 She has been with me since she was 2 and my ex is getting $400 a mounth from her natural father my son is both are,s.She left me and my kids in a financial mess,when I went to get help they told me no and that my wife did not abbandon her kids she left them with me.I do believe it is because i am a man. If thier is a lawyer in Hamilton ONTARIO or someone that could help me it would be greatly appreciated. She is in another Province but if things dont work she might come back for the kids ard the only reason she would want the kids is for money HELP PLEASE DESPERATE FATHER.
2007-01-06 16:55:19 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am sorry for your situation, it is a sad one.
Have you looked into Legal Aid? Unfortunately, men often do get the shaft when it comes to family court, but that doesn't mean you should give up hope. And I applaud your decision to raise your ex's daughter as your own-- you are a testament to fatherhood.
Has she made any contact with the children since she left? If she hasn't, then someone could define that as abandonment. Also, if she is receiving child support for a child that is not in her custody, then you should look into the Family Responsibility Office(it's the organization that deals with Child Support) and let them know that she has left the province. She shouldn't be receiving support for a child she isn't taking care of.
I can't remember the name, but there is an organization that works to support Single Fathers(I'm sure you can Google search it) and they also may be able to help.
I do so wish you the best of luck.. hang in there, you are a great dad!
2007-01-06 17:12:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ya know the biggest thing that concerns me is that she receives money for her daughter that you are raising. I know that you could go to court and at least stop her from getting it, Not that you would.. But maybe she wouldn't be so comfortable with her new boyfriend. The reason I felt compelled to answer this is because when I met my husband of now 15 years, he was raising his two children and I find that very loving, compassionate..well all the things that most people dont believe men can and will do for their children or in your case stepchild. Please dont let the woman that walked out on her kids ever have them back. What if next time they dont have you but some loser? I also feel she abandoned them no matter what the officials... and I use that term lightly...say. God Bless ya! I still believe if she has a job you can get support. My husband couldnt because his X was a heroin addict but you may be able too. God, I think you are GREAT!!!!!
2007-01-06 17:06:58 · answer #2 · answered by Sherry D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There should be police reports filed that are a matter of public record and should be available at the police department. If you call the non-emergency services line, you should be able to find out how to get copies. If they seem reluctant, you can get a lawyer to get them. The police reports show a pattern of domestic discord and maybe a pattern of alcoholism and violence. Your son could secretly audio record the phone and in-person conversations they have, but check with a lawyer on your state's laws first. Get a video, if you can without her knowing about it. Get unrelated people to witness the crazy. If your son is returning the kids, he should be on her doorstep, maybe taking a small video and saying the date, time, and giving a picture of the front porch, the doorbell being rung and not answered and a view of the empty driveway. If he does this multiple times and downloads it all onto a tape or cd, that would all be good evidence of what really goes on. If any of the children are physically abused, take pictures. If they went to the hospital because of her abuse or neglect, get the x-rays and other records. Make sure your son does not say anything mean or hateful or argumentative toward the ex, especially in any recorded material! He needs to stay calm and reasonable at ALL times. The reason for the above is that judges hear allegations all the time between parents. Many are false. They don't know who to believe. If you give them hard evidence of her voice, her image, letters in her handwriting, video of her absence at drop-off time, etc., a judge can have something real to go on. Get a good lawyer. Get evidence and non-relative witnesses. Give the judge every reason to believe you by collecting cold hard evidence that tells your story. Anything that can tell your story in the form of evidence is what you want. What judges hate is when two parents bicker constantly without proof and put their children in the middle of a horrible situation. I hope this helps you--good luck with helping the children. :-)
2016-03-29 00:33:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really use your resources to see if you can file for support. Regardless, it is best to protect your children. Go to whatever court system you have to get support and some type of custody order in place. The kids are old enough to say who they want to be placed with. If they feel so strongly about the mom, then the decision will be easier. The rules shouldn't be any different for a dead beat mom. Look into the court system out there.
2007-01-06 17:03:35 · answer #4 · answered by mightycute912 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friend
I'm not an attourney, but I can't imagine any court giving your wife custody of those kids after she left them.
Now, in my humble opinion, she is committing fraud by accepting child support from the girl's natural father when the girl is being supported and cared for by YOU. Since she is the non-custodial parent, you are legally entitled to collect child support from HER---at least, that's how it works here in Michigan.
Please keep taking those kids to therapy. Lord knows they need it after what their mother's done to them. You're a great person for taking on all this responsibility, and best of luck to you.
2007-01-06 17:03:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
www.fathers.ca/child_custody_&_access.htm
www.custodysource.com/ii~1.htm
Please check out these websites for more information.
It sounds like abandonment to me . Look in your phone book for a lawyer.. Get yourself a female lawyer. Go for custody ASAP.
Oh by the way if your wife gets child support for the oldest one and the child is living full time with you and you are supporting her I would mention this to the lawyer as well. She is committing fraud.
2007-01-06 17:06:16 · answer #6 · answered by That_ blue_ eyed_ Irish_ lass 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were in the U.S. I would suggest you go see a lawyer and file for divorce and custody of the children. I would also suggest that you put a restraining order on her for emotional abuse on the children's behalf. I would also get as many people as you can to testify on your behave, such as teachers, children's doctors, neighbors, etc. when you go to court for a custody hearing.
2007-01-06 17:04:30 · answer #7 · answered by Aumatra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go see the movie Pursuit of Happyness. Starring Will Smith and his son. Or just check out the trailer
2007-01-06 17:02:21 · answer #8 · answered by Kandi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to hear about your troubles..not sure how it is where u live but here in Florida you can go to court and file for child support...she is not living with you and the kids..file a separation with court or file for a divorce..don't take her back..the kids will end up resenting you..i know from experience...good luck
2007-01-06 17:01:10 · answer #9 · answered by lost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-02-11 17:12:24 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋