My husband left me over a month ago. He made it pretty clear he doesn't want to be with me ever again. He was verbally and emotionally abusive (to me and our son) and I fell out of love with him a long time ago. After the initial shock wore off of him just up and leaving with no warning, I realized he'd done me a favor. How soon is too soon to talk about a relationship with someone else after that?
2007-01-06 16:38:06 · 10 answers · asked by QuestionQueen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How long can only be determined by you. However, as your marriage ended abruptly you do have some things to deal with. Take some time for you and your son to adjust the changes in your life. When you are ready (and the other person for that matter) opportunities will present themselves.
Do not be in a hurry to be in a new relationship. Allow things to develop naturally. You are perfect just the way you are and do not need to be in a relationship to be so.
Do not avoid men who are attracted to you either. One day at a time is the best I can offer.
All the best to your son and you.
2007-01-06 17:21:38 · answer #1 · answered by o_s_c_c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he HAS done you a favor. Good for you. How soon is "too" soon depends on the person; I think, "rebound" relationships are generally very risky, and have a potential of blowing up in your face - which is not to say that you necessarily need to avoid them, just be careful. Sometimes, pursuing a new relationship is just the way to take your mind off of things temporatily - it doesn't have to be "serious" or "forever", it could just be a distraction. If you're the type who tends to put a lot of stock in relationships, maybe it would be more prudent to wait until the dust settles - which might mean a few more months - before starting to look for something new. But if you feel you can take things lightly, and not get too involved - then trying out some new things and meeting new people might be for you. Whatever you decide - good luck.
2007-01-06 16:55:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really feel that's up to you. I was married for 10yrs and like yourself my x done me a favor as well. I started dating a month later and then married again 6m later. My advise please do not rush into anything. I am divorce once again but that is because I realized that I hadn't figured out what I wanted. Now that I am single again I date, and only date, to figure out who I am. I have found that sometimes we lose ourselves in a relationship and only realize that after the relationship is over. So I would advise you to date but at the same time make sure you know who you are and what you want out of the next relationship. Take you time and heal from what you have been through, you will love yourself for it. Good luck
2007-01-06 16:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by Mateesta B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grieving is different for different people. Maybe your uncle missed her sooo much that he just needed some company to fill the void. He only has a girlfriend...he hasn't married her yet. It doesn't mean he loves your Aunt any less nor does it mean that he's even "in love" with the girlfriend. I can understand why you're upset; but it's his life & his grief & I don't see it's your place to judge him!!! Your Mom hasn't moved on because she hasn't met another man that can complete her like your Dad. You are lucky in that respect. It sounds like you'd make your Mother's life miserable if she dared to get a boyfriend!!! It's been 5 years since my husband died & I have NO desire to date; however, if I met a man who completed me like he did come tomorrow, I'd start dating tomorrow. Actually, I hope I don't meet him as I'm not ready to have another relationship. I enjoy being on my own!!!
2016-03-29 00:30:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I waited somewhere around 2 or 3 years to be serious with someone else. I dated before then but it was nothing serious. I put a lot of my time into my son who was 3 at the time of the divorce. He was my everything (and still is) and I made sure whoever I was going to be with next was going to be good to him.
2007-01-06 16:57:00 · answer #5 · answered by MD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give yourself some time to heal...rebounds are not good...unless you're looking for a quickie...learn to love yourself, re-assess your priorities, your life. Don't try to be in a relationship just because you think that will solve everything. Make sure your son also is part of the "relationship" process; even though he's a kid, he has feelings too. :)
2007-01-06 16:45:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you have to get a divorce first. One thing is you may persue a friendship with another gentleman but once the marriage is legally over, then it will be the right time I feel.
2007-01-06 16:41:56 · answer #7 · answered by SP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be fair after you are divorced,, its proper,, and ask yourself are you emotionally ready?
2007-01-06 16:41:25 · answer #8 · answered by kitkatish1962 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever you think you are ready. No one else can tell you. Everyone is different.
2007-01-06 16:43:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you feel ready to do so is the right time
2007-01-06 16:54:21 · answer #10 · answered by singledad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋