its been ten yrs for me and four months for him
2007-01-06 15:56:23 · 26 answers · asked by badkittykitty2001 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he was married for 14 yrs
2007-01-06 16:05:07 · update #1
There's no one that can make that decision for you. 4months sounds a little tight, but maybe he was in a loveless relationship for a couple years before they actually separated. It's hard to say. Just do it when you both feel comfortable.....and there's really no rush anyways, right?
2007-01-06 15:58:02 · answer #1 · answered by sarahjaniepoo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on if you are ready or not. There is not guarenteed time limit on any of this relationship stuff. I would say if you are totally comfortable with the concept of getting married again then go for it. You might want to stop and take into consideration what you know about the previous relationshio because if for him its been a shorter time span what was going on in the marriage before he left (assuming its divorce that is the reason hes single). If it had been a "bad" relationship or "emotionally" over long before he left four months isnt such a bad deal. Loves love dont pass it up because your worried that "the time isnt right" or it "hasnt been long enough". It should be what the two of you think not what everyone else thinks and if your putting it off because of public opinion or others perceptions........why are you getting married in the first place since you obviously worry more about what people think that what your partner does about you.
2007-01-06 16:01:38 · answer #2 · answered by wing23ca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's really something that only the two of you can decide. I think four months seems a little short, but it really depends on your situation. Ask yourself a few questions:
- How long was he married for before it ended?
- How long have you been dating?
- Could he be rebounding?
The only concern with four months is that he may just be rebounding. When a person is that early out of a serious relationship, it helps to step back for a bit. Jumping immediately into another relationship without fully understanding what went wrong in the previous one is a recipe for disaster. At the same time though, there are relationships such as yours that have lasted lifetimes.
2007-01-06 16:02:42 · answer #3 · answered by RomanceStuck 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only "right" amount of time there is before getting remarried is when the both of you feel its time to get married!
Of course, it's always ideal to be patient--get to know each other better, discuss the possibilities of a life together more fully, and working out each others' quirks and kinks that could potentially lead to trouble. However, when it feels right for you two to get remarried then it's probably time to do it.
There isn't any predetermined amount of time set aside explicitly for "between marriages" like there is for the cost of buying an engagement ring, though if time is no object then it's better to wait as long as is necessary, which of course is up to the two of you.
2007-01-06 16:06:17 · answer #4 · answered by Bladeron DC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after 10 years for you you should already know that after 4 months for him isn't nearly enough time to even be THINKING of marriage much less dating! Shame on you! He is clearly on the rebound and I for one would NEVER play second fiddle to anyone! Wait until he has been divorced long enough for him to know just what he wants not what is familiar and comfortable, You deserve a marriage that is based on love for each other not a substitute for something else!
2007-01-06 16:17:30 · answer #5 · answered by KayKay 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When it feels right for the both of you. There is no set time limit. As long as your both in love and divorced then do it now. Why sit and ponder the thing unless your not sure?
2007-01-06 15:59:22 · answer #6 · answered by Sweetness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no certain amount of time for both of you to wait. When you are BOTH sure that you are over your ex-husband/wives and you are sure that you are in love and want to be married, that is the time to get married. Love is a beautiful thing, enjoy it. :)
2007-01-06 15:59:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is my uneducated opinion having never been married at 28 - I think he needs more time......at least a solid year. Three years the most.
2007-01-06 16:00:28 · answer #8 · answered by kim_mii 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel okay with having sex again or dating again than it's fine, if you feel uncomfortable with another man then just tell him you still want to be together you just want to take it really slowly so you don't hurt his feelings. I hope I've been helpful. Bye!
2007-01-06 16:00:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's been 10 years for me & almost 15 for him & we are in are 40's & 50's. Numbers are just numbers... when it feels right it will be right.
2007-01-06 15:59:33 · answer #10 · answered by texas tornado 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋