i HAVE ANGER ISSUE AND DONT KNOW HOW TO CONTROL IT HOW DO I CALM DOWN?

Question

i dont hurt any body or anything when i am angry it just takes over me and i punch STUFF but that just doesnt help i regret things i say

Answer 1

I have the same problem that I can't control my anger. Well what I do is just go to my room and start punching on the bed that calms me down or just scream with the pillow on my face. You can let anyother person control your feeling when someone is getting at you just think about how they are controling your feelings your anger so dont listing to them just calm yourself. Thats what I try to do.

Answer 2

Meds is not the way to go. They are just that, drugs. They may help curb the problem for a brief period of time, but once the meds wear off the problem is back so nothing is gained or solved but you putting more money into someone’s pocket.

So what you need to do is find a solution to the problem. I really can’t say what you should do because I don’t know what is making you angry.
When you feel your self starting to get angry stop and evaluate the situation. Find out what is making you angry and why?
Punching stuff isn't working out so don't it. Sometimes its better to walk away and think about what happen. You don't always have to deal with a situation right on the spot.



My suggestion is to speak with a counselor and avoid the meds. A counselor will help you and provide you with the proper tools to better control your anger.

Tools being knowledge and understanding.

Answer 3

First of all, you've done the best first step. You have admitted you have a problem and want to work to fix it. Controlling anger is difficult, and although the minimal information you've provided makes it hard for me to answer your question, I'll try anyway. The main problem with anger is that humans form habits. If you constantly get angry, you're more likely to get angry next time. So the first thing to do is realize that. Now for the stark truth: Solving this alone is going to require a lot of self discipline. I suggest setting up a penalty system for yourself. Any time you lash out, inflict that penalty. It could be denying yourself privileges temporarily, such as internet access, or your phone, or something. It could be paying money to a jar, if you can afford that (if you run out of money, it becomes pointless). Essentially, this will make lashing out a source of immediate negativity, and your subconscious will begin to stop doing it. Once you've broken the habit, it should be a lot easier to maintain your good attitude. If this doesn't work, you probably have a chemical imbalance that's causing it and should see a psychologist. However, this should be a last resort: I'm a firm believer in attempting to solve mental issues without medication at first. -Salivanth

Answer 4

People who have high stress jobs have a very high threshold for lashing out in anger by attending anger management classes.

Try to get into some of these classes.
Meanwhile, try counting to 10 before even acknowledging an explosive situation (for you)
When you feel your ears getting hot, and your nosetrils steaming, and your glasses getting foggy, think about how funny you look to the guy you are getting mad at.

That would calm you down for a few minutes. If it is important, say " Can I meet you in my office ,etc in a few hours? I just have to deal with something else " that cannot wait.
Set a date and time. Do not deal with anything important immediately when you are not in control.

Answer 5

Three suggestions: First, try and develope a sense of humor and look for the "funny" side of things. Learn to "laugh it off." Second, develop the ability to relax and destress yourself. In other words, practice relaxation strategies to calm yourself down and not get so worked up over it. Third, ask yourself if you are being "rational" with your anger or are you being "irrational." In other words, does it really matter what is happening to me to get me so angry? Is the word coming to an end if this anger provoking thing happens? Probably not. Learn to see how irrational we can be about things and learn to be more low key.

Answer 6

The moment you sense yourself getting out of control - then in your mind, yell "STOP!"..., and if you are about to get way out of control as in violent .., you may want to speak it out loud to yourself..., "STOP IT.., Just Stop it".

It sometimes helps to put your name in it. Like..., "Stop it Joe! (or jane, whatever your name is) Stop it now!"

The moment you do that you put on the breaks temporarily. You have to remove yourself from the situation while those breaks are on.

Lets say you go off on someone - you try the above technique. You may have fired up the other person so you can expect the other party to keep ranting back. The moment you "stop" - you look at this person and say, "This has got out of hand. Its my bad, and I need to walk away now and chill out. This really is not worth arguing about"..., Or "..., this is really not something we (or I) need to fight about"

Then WALK away. Even if they call you chicken, realize they have no clue - and let them live in their delusional world.

After you have calmed down - you can later explain calmly to the person that you have an Anger Management Problem and you are trying to deal with it - and apologize for anything you may have said.

There is no quick fix - but "forced effort" on your part can change things around.

Answer 7

You are n control of you nobody else. If someone makes you mad and you hurt them in anyway then that's a sign of weakness. I would advise you to think before you act. Don't do something that you are going to regret or my favorite read the Bible meet Jesus that's what helped me

Answer 8

Try counseling, medication, and exercise to work off the stress that leads to the anger. If you feel more in control of your life, you are less likely to feel the anger.

Answer 9

Go visit somebody that I respect and act my very best until I become calm. If I can't do this I hit a punching bag until I get over it.

Answer 10

First, hit the caps lock key and stop yelling at us :-) There are effective anger management courses you can tqake, but like quiting smoking, will only work if you want them to.