How do u think Indian women in urban areas who face domestic violence can be inspired to not accept abuse?

Question

How do you think Indian women in urban areas who face domestic violence can be inspired to stop accepting abuse and get a divorce and move on in life? Also according to the Indian Penal Code what is the legal punishment for a guy who abuses his wife? Can the punishment be increased if kids are involved who are not directly physically abused by the guy but face a lot of mental torture due to the actions of the guy. The wife is too submisive and religious to take steps against the husband. How can she be inspired/convinced to do so?

Answer 1

Your question is tough one, but not impossible to answer or achieve a solution;
First of all we assume you are talking in general and not for any particular woman.
We will arrive at some conclusion by using the law of elimination;
1) Laws alone cannot help, if that was possible there won't be any thefts or murders,
2) Others cannot help, as it becomes more of a personal issue and each individual has to take separate charge and decision,
3) She cannot fight back, as she is physically and mentally not sustainable to fight back,
4) She cannot survive single, because of society norms and threat to her loneliness,
5) She has no means to get the latest knowledge, as she is not enough literate and not interacting with outside world as often as required.
If you look at the above notes it will be clear that only
Knowledge, strength, law and support of others all at one time can initiate the moves in woman who wish to fight against the abuse and exploitation.
we would not like to differentiate much between urban or rural women, but can address issues that are different in nature for each of them.
Now the very problem we have today is that majority of Indian women are house wives and they use their majority of time doing their house chorus. The rest of the time which they get is taken up by TV soap operas, or kitty parties or doing things that are worthless in life.
We would like to quote here Peter Drucker the management guru, "There is nothing as useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all"
So majority of this folks do this in reverse.
Now if women grow out and start looking at survival of their own in their spare time, they will not be abused as much as they are been today.
Now the very basic fundamental change in our society which is need is to accept women to be reliant in self survival.
What we need to emphasis is educate women before marriage at lest to the extend that they can work to have some earnings doing jobs of their liking.
Education can be done at any time of age, and hence we can even educate married women if they want to, at any time even after marriage and develop skill so that they can share the burden of their husband in making ends meet at the end of day.
These skills will also give her moral support, self-confidence and self-esteem. Where by whenever in life she is faced with any such conditions where she has to rise up against abuse or crime she has enough strength to take help from law, family, friends and make her own decision with out being dictated by her husband or in-laws.
One more thing I would add here that especially in developing and under developed countries the missing organisation is family counselling.
Just thing how many counselling center are there in even major cities like Delhi, Mumbai, Banglore or any other city you name it.
The Government and NGO's if really wish to help out fight this problem they have to go to homes and develop a friendly relationship with the citizens and provide counselling at ease to every one in the society.
Another major aspect in our Indian culture is wide range of religious differences. There is hardly a weekly or monthly gathering of people who exchange or listen to Life's and God's message as you can say.
There is very poor habit of reading self help readings, or visiting libraries.
We avoid debate classes or functions.
This answer would run in pages if we write evrything here, so if any one is seriously interested in helping the society in good cause please email us at nischai_org@ yahoo.co.in and we will be more than glad to work along.
Have you done your Nischai today?

Answer 2

This is a very tough question. there is no such thing as one answer..Its a multiple things that have to happen. First big factor is poverty. If you are poor then you can not get education, however rich people wherever they live they can afford to get their kids educated. Sometimes even educated brides be abused because of family pressures. I am born Indian but have lived for long in north America, one thing that i have learnt is, that man and women are equal, there is no two ways about it. Its going to take very long time in urban India, where women will be strong enough to stand up for their rights. Where, even if they are not married nobody will look at them as if they are a burden. In my opinion men need more understanding of the rights of women , then women themselves. They should treat them with utmost respect, because they are the mother of their children. if you are abusing your wife ,while children watching, then most likely once their daughters are married they will accept abuse even if they get educated. . That's the pattern they have seen when they were young.

Answer 3

Domestic Violence(prevention) act 2005 which came into existence since October 2006 is a very effective legal tool. This provides for redressal to abuse on account of physical, verbal, emotional, and the threat to financial abuse etc.
The first step is to lodge a complaint at the nearest police station or the family court.
The moot point is, many women prefer to tolerate an abusive husband for various reasons!
A movement to empower them could be a great help! Starting from creating awareness among school children - girls being made aware of their rights and boys being sensitised to the need to banish the menace of abuse.
A very relevant question at the right time...I appreciate your empathy for this issue.

Answer 4

I am afraid it's going to be very tough, u see women in our society still think their husbands, stand next to God, and divorce is a taboo, I know women would rather die than go through a divorce, so sadly, most women just keep on tolerating torture at the hands of their husbands, and dont eventhink abt moving out, let alone getting a divorce,their is a law agains domestic violence, but unless the woman decides to do something against it, I am not sure much can be done, What you can do however is that you can encourage her to atleast meet the women who are associated with these women's associations, I am sure they can talk to the husband, even threaten him, and do whatever is necessary.

Answer 5

A lot of women don't go ahead and stop abuse or do anything against their husbands because they r scared. And they r scared cox they believe they r alone. As per Indian system once ur married u n husband is the family. Noone else has a right to interfere. A lot of women r scared if they do anything against their husbands, like say right a police complaint, who will support them or their kids??
I guess These women need to know that there r people by them. they r not alone. They hav a right to live their lives. Stand by them. Show them a taste of life when it is free of abuse and fear. make them believe in themselves. Reinstigate their faith....!! I personaly think the best way would be is by being friends and letting them know that they have nothing to fear....u, the legal system will with be them. They will not necessarily have to fight alone....!!

Answer 6

First off don't use your race as a security blanket, one abused women is no diffrent then another abused women, race doesn't matter. Sometimes fear controls all...and change can not happen until the fear is controled, This women needs to find a safe place for herself and her children,somewhere with people that truely care about her...if she isn't willing then she is just another faceless victim in the eyes of the law.

Answer 7

Depends wher your from?Sounds like Pakistan,I think they treat women so poorly it is pathetic,Not all men are like that i know but they grew up with those morals .Report on that woman beater find her a shelter,Do something you'll feel better knowing you did do something.This kind of abuse can't keep on happening

Answer 8

Rent Jenifer Lopez's (Enough) that should do it. If not we may have to consider the sad fact ,that some people not only women lack the ability to use common sense.

Answer 9

By adapting themselves into the american culture. So many immigrants move here and embrace everything america has to offer except the culture.

Answer 10

don't know but you would think if a mother saw some one abusing there kids that would be enough for me to get out with them