What can they do?

Question

Ok, I've been dating this girl that is 15 for two months now, and her parents have forbid it from day one. I'm seventeen, and we are almost exactly two years apart within a week.

Yesterday I got a call from her, but surprise surprise, it was her mom, and they found out that we were seeing each other. To say she was pissed was an understatement. She's threatening me with all kinds of crap, which I don't think she can back up. First they say if I don't stay away from her they can charge me with statutory rape, which first of all, we haven't done anything, and second of all, if I understand the oklahoma rape laws, adolescents may consent with adolescents, as we are now, and a 16 year old can consent with a legal adult, which I will be, but she'll be 16 a week after I am.

Second of all, can they get a protective order on me. Can they do that if she doesn't sign an affadavit saying I pose some kind of threat to her or I have been stalking her? I don't think a parent can do that on there own can they? I know she wouldn't sign anything like that.

Her dad also threatened to break both of my legs if he catches me with her, that a physical threat if I've ever heard one and I'm sure that is against some laws. Her dad is currently on probation from a domestic violence charge and has to take anger management.

What do you think I should do? What can her parents legally do, and what can I legally do?

Answer 1

Ok here's the thing. I don't know the laws of the state you are in so it makes it a little difficult. However if the two of you are only 2 years apart then they most likely are not able to get you with a crime being that you are under the age of 18 currently, but the day you turn 18 they maybe able to have you arrested. I will tell you this.....you can not get slapped with rape if you are not messing around. In most states there are laws that say when a child is of age to consent. In Oregon you have to be 14 years old before you are legally able to consent. Some states it is 16 and yet some states it is 12. I would suggest that you just back off. I am a mother myself and I can say with all certanty that I would freaked out at the prospect of my daughter dating someone of your age. I know that the age difference is not very large, but there IS a difference in menatlity in that age range. Being a male you are automatically slapped with the raging hormone issue which makes you the enemy. You could be the sweetest kid on the planet and that still would not change. Also do you really want to risk causing problems for her and her parents? Or you with yours? Don't you think that it would be smarter to just hang out and see what developes later? I know it pry seems like the end of the world but honestly honey it is not. I wish I could say that you should and could stay with her and it would all be okay. But I can't because it won't be. You will end up in trouble with the law if you are not careful and that is not a road that you want to go down. If you have more questions you can either email me or go to your local police station and ask the officers. Even if you see an officer on the street fo talk to them and get the facts about the laws. I wish you luck and know that it will get better so long as you are responsible in yur actions. Good Luck hon.

Answer 2

Sounds like you are headed down a path of tears!

If they can convince a judge that you pose a threat to the peace and dignity of the family and community, they can get a restraining order against you. Even if it lasts only a day, it is there on your record for the rest of your life. If you ever get a job, you have to put that down. You could also be barred from gun ownership. And that is if you DON'T violate the restraining order.

If you do violate the order, jail time!

Now when I was 17 I thought I was in love with a girl 16 who's parents did not approve. I ALMOST made the same mistake that you will probably make inspite of the advice from me and others.

Fortunately, did follow the advice of someone older and wiser. Turns out the "love of my life" soon found another "sucker' (I am referring to me, nor you!) who ended up marrying her. Seems she just wanted someone to get her out of her parents' house. It did not matter who it was.

Last time I was back home, I was told that she has six children from 3 different men (possibly 4 men, but who knows) and while she was beautiful as a teenage, now she would make a good BEFORE example in an extreme weightloss commercial!

In other words, it is not worth it! Do the smart thing!

Answer 3

have you talked to your parents about? you need to tell them that he threated you
(ie:Her dad also threatened to break both of my legs if he catches me with her, that a physical threat if I've ever heard one and I'm sure that is against some laws. Her dad is currently on probation from a domestic violence charge and has to take anger management.) also if she will be old enough to consent then there is nothing they can do about it. what you really need to do though is tell your parents her mom and dad have been threatening you so that the correct legal action can be filled against them for threatening a minor since you arent of legal age yet

and the fact that she threatened you with statutory rape before you were 18 there is nothing they can do considaring yall are both minors and able to consent with each other betwen a week

Answer 4

Here is the point I have to make. If she is still living under her parents roof, they have the right to tell her who she can and cannot see. If she is seeing you of her own free will, they cannot charge you with stalking. If she is still a virgin, there is nothing her parents can do except contact CPS telling them that she is an unruly child. They will not do that for fear of CPS taking her away.

There is probably nothing you can do about charging her father with a violent threat unless you can prove by a witness that he actually said that. If you have two witnesses, you could file an Affidavit of Complaint against her father and probably make it stick, especially with his previous record. You run the risk of loosing your girlfriend over that. Statutory Rape would be pretty hard to proove if she is still a virgin. They would look pretty foolish in Court.

Since the Law tends to protect children now, she could at least threaten to sue her parents for violating her 4th. Amendment rights to privacy.

I would just play it cool and avoid her parents as much as possible.

Answer 5

Hey that sucks... First of all, you didn't do anything wrong... Dating a girl is not against the law, remember that. Your girlfriend has the right to her personal integrity, that means that if she wants to date you, nobody can legally prevent her from doing that.

If her father does anything to you, anything, that will damage you materially, morally or physically, you can sew him. As a matter of fact, you can already sew him. (I wouldn't recommend it though...)

I would suggest that you'ld be patient and try to talk to her parents from time to time. Always be nice, don't do anything stupid as to threaten them back or yell at them or something and eventually they will accept you I think. But be patient, in your case this may very well take some time I'm afraid :p
Also, let your parents talk to her parents. If her parents start to like your family, things will go easier.


good luck mate...

Answer 6

Legally they can't do anything to you....by her father saing that he'll break both of your legs that's considered a verbal threat and he can be suied for that....considering there were witness around. Secondly they do have the right to tell you that they don't want you to see thier daughter, because she is under age. So buddy i really don't know what else to say! good luck

Answer 7

they might try to get you for stalking.... do not call or see the girl
tell her she can email or write you a letter..
tell your parent what is going on and about the threats
most of all if seeing this person is causing trouble ,then stay away from her ............unless she is worth going to jail for........
find a new girlfriend

Answer 8

Just stay away until you both 18. You will save yourself much trouble and anxiety.

Answer 9

It doesnt really matter what they can actually do to you. The entire situation is out of control. There are other girls out there.