I need some help. I want to be friendly to everyone, but my passiveness is making people at work respect me less. How can I step it up and be more assertive?
2007-01-06 05:17:58 · 11 answers · asked by What_A_Gass 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If someone says, "Hand me the stapler," answer "Say please!" and laugh. If they say, 'Can I have change for a $20?," answer, "Sorry, my petty cash is really low." Just say no.
Seriously, keep being friendly, but start asking people to do things for you, start making requests, stop always saying yes and agreeing (if you actually don't agree). Voicing your own opinion is okay. Say hi to people first. Ask questions, and listen to answers. Make priorities, and stick with them instead of dropping everything for everybody. Would they do that for others? Probably not, and it's not always appropriate.
But don't stop being yourself. Just look out for yourself a little more.
2007-01-06 05:26:39 · answer #1 · answered by Bad Kitty! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way is to look at your choice of words.
very assertive: "Give me some actions that are passive and others that are assertive and I need this in the next two hours."
assertive but polite: "Please, give me some actions that are passive and others that are assetive, but I need this within the next two hours if possible."
Don't use words such as; 'well' 'maybe' 'do you think' 'feel', just get to the point.
Actions also show louder than words, so be on time for work, do your job well, but point out to others when you think you did a good job. Also, get to know your boss. Make eye contact, also know when is a good time to approach your boss or others, and try to make statements rather than blanket questions. Also, don't over explain yourself, get to the point and suggest solutions to your own statements so so that it looks like you are proactive not reactive.
2007-01-06 13:22:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being assertive is ... Making the first move, take initiative, volunteer, anticipate what your boss or co workers need and provide it to them, giving suggestions and ideas .. be honest ..
Passive is ... waiting for people to tell you what to do, sitting in the corner and minding your own business ..
2007-01-06 13:30:39 · answer #3 · answered by ladybug21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Assertiveness training may be good for you, then you could do role plays and get used to how being assertive actually feels. This is probably 'safer' and less stressful than just 'going for it'. Good luck.
2007-01-06 13:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by Trixie Bordello 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
instead of letting things go by not saying anything u can express ur feelings and tell someone how u feel and dont be afraid to say "no" when ppl want stuff from u. it is very hard to be assertive wihtout being aggresive...so still be nice but just dont let ppl push u around
2007-01-06 13:20:43 · answer #5 · answered by flatteredwu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have confidance of things you know you are good at and speak your mind....not everyone will like everyone, so get over that part. the less 'friends' at work, the better. do your thing, make your money and go out and have a good time after work. check your personal cr@p at the door and you will be fine.
2007-01-06 13:24:59 · answer #6 · answered by ShaMayMay 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you should be because you should go with what comes to your head first. Do not let anyone change your mind unless it is something to hurt you in some way.
2007-01-06 13:24:38 · answer #7 · answered by oneglook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be assertive, you must be decisive, meaning you make decisions quickly and surely, and then you stick with your decisions with confidence. You must be confident and agressive.
2007-01-06 13:22:33 · answer #8 · answered by tobias 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eye contact!
Prolonged eye contact lets people know that you are standing firm and will not budge.
2007-01-06 13:19:46 · answer #9 · answered by ladyoftherrlake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Know what you stand for. Have your own opinion and don't be afraid to express it (appropriately of course).
2007-01-06 13:19:42 · answer #10 · answered by Nancy O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋