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Okay, this might get long...I generally don't consider myself as the kind of person who gets depressed/stressed out. I am normally happy-go-lucky, optimistic, and I can always find the good in situations. However, since teenagerhood, I have fallen into "lows" where I just get mad at the world; I get tired of trying to make everybody else happy; I feel like I bend over backwards for EVERYONE, but no one ever returns the favor. And to top it all off, my husband, the ONE person I should always be able to count on is never there for me. He usually compounds the problem and starts these "lows". Because I don't feel like he cares about me or loves me. Anyway, I always tell him when I feel like this that I'm sick of trying; I just want to go away...But after a week or two, then I'm back to my normal, cheerful self. I can't say how often this happens; it just comes and goes...little things pile up until I can't take it anymore. So...do you think counseling would help me?

2007-01-06 04:22:08 · 11 answers · asked by Pooky 4 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

11 answers

I think you need to ask yourself what does happiness mean to me? What makes me happy, what does that look like? You said that you don't feel like your husband loves you, and that he is not there for you to count on and that he usually starts your lows but you didn't elaborate on that. Everyone has their own love language from physical touch, words of affirmation, doing special things for them, etc. maybe you need to think about what your love language is and share that with your husband. Also, maybe you are trying to make everyone else happy because you want the favor returned but when it is not you feel cheated. Try doing things to make you happy, remember we are all responsible for our own happiness, we own it. Do the little things that make you smile.
L.

2007-01-06 04:44:28 · answer #1 · answered by tink3610 3 · 0 0

The order is Counselor - Therapist - Psychologist. you're a classic guy, yet have been given some issues in existence. you're emotional, undecisive, puzzled - you bypass to a Counselor. (Counselor has no scientific awareness - to be useful anybody would be a counselor. a stable pal who advises you apart from mght performs a place of a counselor) you're behaving slightly strange, yet at circumstances you're on your stable senses. you're teachable. You hear to 3 one a minimum of. now and lower back you're too loopy, another circumstances you're common - you swing plenty on thoughts - You bypass to a therapist. (Therapist is a para-scientific individual. He is conscious some drugs and concepts. yet he's probable no longer an expert) you're too quiet - or - too noicy - no you could administration you - you assert weired issues - act weired a great number of the time - you do no longer care approximately nutrients - you haven't any longer have been given a great number of sleep - your physique is variety of too heat or too chilly - you're led via your mere insticts or guilt than uncomplicated experience - You bypass to a Psychologist. (He is conscious drugs and additionally concepts of calming you down. he's an expert and many the time you extremely won't be in a position to differentiate between who's the well being care expert and who's the affected person) you additionally can bypass to a Psychologist once you have the 1st 2 form of simptoms. yet a counselor won't be in a position to precise shield the final class.

2016-10-06 12:58:15 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I think your reaction is perfectly normal. Everybody gets depressed when they face challenges in life. What makes it more difficult for you to cope is that you do not have a support system in your family and husband. How about some good friends. Do you have any caring and understanding friends you could open up to. Because you need some positive people in your life so you do not loose your sanity. it is also a good thing that you take vacation and escape for awhile. Everybody needs that sometimes to regroup. It seems that you are taking good care of yourself. Trust me you are not in anyway unstable. You just need to surround yourself with positive people. And if the relationship with your husband is making you unhappy, you need to let him go. And also learn to say no. It is good to be selfish sometimes as people tend to be abusive of your kindness. Regarding the lows in teenage-hood. Everybody went trough that. It is a normal stage of growing up. Good luck.

2007-01-06 04:43:41 · answer #3 · answered by lovelyeyes 1 · 1 0

It sounds to me like you are a "People Pleaser", and that is actually considered a complex that is not healthy. Oprah Winfrey struggled with that for many years she said. I dont think your husband is the main problem--I think the problem starts with You. I think you need counceling to learn how to set bounderies and to learn how to say "no" to people who leave you feelin unhappy, used, and abused. There are also many self-help books out there that can help you. Just go look for self-help books under "people-pleasing" and you will see many people who suffered like you, and you'll learn techniques to change.

You sound like a good person, and your Optimism will get you through this. When you finally get the courage to say No and stop bedning overbackwards, your life will balance out. You will realize that these people are simply draining your positive energy.

As for your husband--after you get begin to heal yourself through self-help books or counceling, you may realize that you deserve a better, more supportive husband as you continue this journey of life. Life is too short to waste our precious time and youth on people who tear down our-self esteem and take away from our happiness. Good Luck.

2007-01-06 04:35:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I would recommend several things:
1) see your regular doctor immediately and tell him/her what you've just said.
2) see a psychologist and explain these symptoms.
3) start a regular exercise program (with the counsel and advice of the regular doctor, of course).

2007-01-06 04:26:26 · answer #5 · answered by domesticgoddess 4 · 1 0

See a therapist, this sounds a little like me ans I went to one and she said I may be soft bipolar. She gave me something to even out my moods and so far it is working.

2007-01-06 04:50:49 · answer #6 · answered by peach 4 · 0 0

Counseling helps me!!! I have went to counseling many times and they always seem to know how you feel and they never dislike you they always want to help you

2007-01-06 04:25:39 · answer #7 · answered by WHY ME LORD??? 2 · 1 0

sometimes i feel the same way!! and my husband too is the cause, or atleast thats how i feel that he doesnt love niether cares fr me as he's never there...!
try tolking to him about it... maybe that might help, or you can get in touch with me at gummyyummyy@hotmail.com
support system is always good.
good luck :)

2007-01-06 04:57:31 · answer #8 · answered by Aphrodyte`` 1 · 2 0

Yes you need counseling but your husband needs to go as well.

2007-01-06 04:25:00 · answer #9 · answered by Lucinda M 3 · 1 0

yes...i think a counselour would really help you understand alot of things...

2007-01-06 04:25:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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