ok here it goes,what if you lyed about soo many things to your partner and now she/he doesnt know what to do??!!! I mean she/he doesnt know if they should believe you or not!!! how do u earn there trust back w/o huting the other person???
2007-01-06 03:00:52 · 25 answers · asked by peaches 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When you find yourself "IN A HOLE", the first thing you do is STOP DIGGING! You have to stop LYING! You have to stop lying as of right now, then go back and try to rectify all the lies in your past that you can. He is NEVER going to trust you until you do. Good Luck!
2007-01-06 03:21:15 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW, trust in a relationship is key. If by lying all the time you have broken that trust it is totally up to you to do the repair. Simply quit lying. Figure out why you were lying, did it make you feel better or look better for whatever reason. You first need to figure out why who you really are isn't good enough for YOU, before you can be honest with them. Seek counselling, together or alone. If they think you are honestly trying to change and they really love you they'll understand, however, if you tell as much as one more lie it could be the straw that breaks the camels back and there may be serious consequences for you. They just may have had enough and you stand the risk of losing them forever.
2007-01-11 23:41:49 · answer #2 · answered by gadgetsgirl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What makes u feel that u need to be trustworthy is what?, just a worry that things are slipping away from your hands, or a real feeling of sorrow and remorse. It is totally up to you, it involves the other person, how much he is able to forgive. Start by being honest, and patient and try to prove that you really intend to change, from inside not from outside. your problem is more difficult if the problems that made u lie in the first place are still active, so it is a complicated job that needs to be sorted out all in the same time and as soon as possible. However, unfortunately, you will have to bear the sense of guilt until you are truly forgiven, it is a very difficult feeling, but you have to do what you have to do.
2007-01-14 01:42:13 · answer #3 · answered by Tarek D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, you come clean about everything you've lied about. It'll be brutal and embarassing, but its necessary. Clear the air, be honest, talk/explain everything and start over. Starting over is not easy at all...It'll be very rocky at first, but it takes time and patience to win trust back, but if your open minded and patient, it can be done.
This is only an option if you TRULY believe your relationship is worth fighting for. If you have doubts, or reservations about your future happiness then there is no point torturing each other with the truth. Just cut your ties. But if you want to fight for it, really fight for it.... then you guys need to sit down, discuss the fact that you know you are meant to be together and decide if you think you can work past everything and still be happy. Then confess like you've never confessed before! It'll hurt like hell, but it can be worth it. If your meant to be together you will prevail.
It can be done, I've done it....
2007-01-13 04:06:14 · answer #4 · answered by CEP 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once the trust is broken, dishonesty takes over until that trust is earned back. Never underestimate the power of trust. In any relationship, to Love someone, is to trust someone. But you must first Love yourself, and trust yourself. Then take it one day at a time. Ask God for help, guidance and understanding, and he will give you the strength to go forward. Good Luck, and God Bless you.
2007-01-11 15:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by deni 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man r u my husband?...LOL....but honeslty..wow, this is so like real to me. it hits home, once you tell one lie you almost allways have to tell another. And for the simple fact tht you've lied soooo many times..i think it will be hard for you to gain tht trust back. When she plays shirlock holmes to find out things, and put pieces together, you will get aggravated, but understand, now she's fiending for herself now, cause you want give her the truth...atleast tht's what she thinks. ANd to be honest....its ashame. If you loved her why so many lies? The best advice i have for u is to just be real from here on.......even though she wont believa a word, you made it tht way. I dont think the people of the world realize how severe.deceitment is. This isn't childhood where its easy to forget, these lies are like stains, hard to remove stains in the heart. But i think if you just do what you have to do to convince her tht you love her, and tht you aren't lieing, than you have a long way to go...LOL...but if you are willing to stick it through go for it. It may not be tht hard, depending on what you lied about. Trust me i'd be somewhat happier if my husband would've lied about having a tattoo, or the neighbors dog tht we sit, is ours instead of actually being for the neighbor, then the lies ive been told, much more forgivable...LOL...
but hang in there...a way would reveal itself
2007-01-11 23:24:04 · answer #6 · answered by Beautynbeyond 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Earn his trust back by doing all the best you can (just about everything that would make him believe that you're being truthful this time!) to prove to him that you are a trustworthy person.
Give him a sensual massage,
treat him out to dinner,
tell him how much you love & adore him,
tell him he's the best thing that ever happened to you!
2007-01-12 20:31:31 · answer #7 · answered by LadyLuv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that would be very hard to earn someones trust back after so many lies. there is a fine line in the sand that one just does not want to cross. and once that line is crossed ...it is very hard to get on the right side of things again. you know where i am coming from here , i am sure.
2007-01-06 03:42:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is not something you keep breaking and expect to get back everytime you tell a lie. It is earned--all of the time--and valued. It's like a precious gift--once given always treasured--taken away--always lost.
2007-01-06 04:58:44 · answer #9 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get out of their life and start off with someone else telling the truth. You have hurt this person enough and the truth with this one is not in you and they know it.
When you lie, you have to keep on lying . When you tell the truth, you don't have to remember what you lied about...
Good luck on correcting your problem.
2007-01-13 11:01:04 · answer #10 · answered by Jill ❤'s U.S.A 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋