Need help- my parents are being verbally abusive to eachother...and i'm in the middle and don't know what to d

Question

Like the title says... =(

Thanks to everyone who has responded, but I would also like to add that I really love both of them, and would really hate to see them split up...

Oh, and I've already told them that it hurts me to see them like this... and especially what it does to my other siblings...

Answer 1

You are definately NOT in the middle of this. This is NOT yours, or your siblings fault. If your parents insist on abusing each other, It's between them, and has NOTHING to do with you. You've already told them how it hurts you and your siblings. All you can do is take the next step. Find a list of marriage counselors, and SHOVE it into their faces. Tell them to go, now, and stop tearing your family apart. If they won't, tell them that you'll find an aunt, or uncle, or grandparent to live with until they grow up and act like adults again.

Answer 2

I worked for someone and the husband and wife would get into it. They did not care if they had company or not. After a few times of me being there, I told the wife that I could not take it any more. I told her neither she get counseling or I was going to quit without a notice. She made excuses for him, and that she really loved him and he loved her.!!

I really could not afford to quit without having another job. So I made up my mind that the next time they go at it, I was just going to leave the house for an hour without saying anything to them. I did and when I came back both of them had their mouths open. They did not realize how bad they were screaming at each other.

She went to her doctor and got refereed to a therapist, and she learned not react to his reactions. They are still married, but I got another job shortly after then because it was an unhealthy environment for me.

Write your parents a love letter and let them know what you are feeling on the inside when they scream at each other. Do not tell them what to do, just stress what you are feeling'thinking when you are present.

Answer 3

You need to be straight with both of them. Tell them you need to have a family meeting, and as calmly as possible tell them that you really don't want to be part of their marital problems. They should privately discuss what's wrong between them and try to come to some understanding, or at least show common respect. You should not have to listen to your parents' personal problems with each other. It's not fair, and that's what you need to make them understand.

Answer 4

When you get the chance try to tak to them and let them know how you feel.Don't yell or anything like that just explain to them the arguing need to stop.If they want to rgue try to do it away from you because it is becoming hurtfultowards each other and you do not like to see them hurting each other.Try to see if either of them would be willing to go to couple counciling.It could help.I wish you the best..Good luck..

Answer 5

Try this. if you have a video camera or a tape recorder when they are doing this record it and don't show them until you have recorded them several times. Then say I have something VERY important to ME to show you please watch (or listen) and don't say a word until its completely finished. Then play it. Tell them this is what they are doing to you and how much it hurts. And let them know they need to get help because its tearing you apart. People don't realize what they are doing until they see or hear it . GOOD LUCK

Answer 6

Find another adult to talk to, either a grandparent, aunt or uncle, or a school counselor. Talk to them about it, and ask them to help. When you are alone with each of them, tell them how much it upsets you. Ask them not to fight in front of you. If you are close by when they are fighting, try to distance yourself as much as you can. Try to stay out of their arguments (by not commenting) if they try to involve you. Good luck!