and everything about it except your boyfriend, and wish you could go back to being 17 and make all choices again...?
Want to leave England (I am Spanish, been in London for 5 years), but my boyfriend has "the job of his life", so I have been here for him like a muppet, and I have no one to talk to! have no friends (that is my fault), I left country when I was 22,and was so despearte for love I stayed here and now I am 27! I work in a shop! I do a zillion hours! I wanna go! And then I'll want to die without my boyfriend! AAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Please help before I pull the trigger.........I have a debt of £1700, so I cant leave. I have no money to study and anyway I dont want to start ANYTHING here. ARGHH how can I be such a MUPPET. I wish I could turn -back-time!!
2007-01-06 01:42:33 · 13 answers · asked by Sheldon 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
he DOESN'T want to leave and life in Spain will be much harder for him because he is Polish and Spanish people doesnt like inmigrants much (there are a lot of prejudices), and he might get a job sweeping the streets...
2007-01-06 01:44:14 · update #1
that is what he says
2007-01-06 01:44:35 · update #2
It will take me, with my salary, about 8 months to pay that, banks dont give me credit card because my credit rating is crap, I WANT TO LEAVE NOW, can I get deported?
2007-01-06 01:48:01 · update #3
I ve told him, like a million times.
2007-01-06 01:54:22 · update #4
First of all do not pull any trigger. You love your boyfriend why would you want to kill yourself??
Secondly, you say your in debt
1. Make a budget!
2. Get your debt paid off!!!
3. Save money to leave. Come to the U.S. there are lots of job opp. here.
Now, you say you love your boyfriend. Now, have you told him you hate living in London? Please tell him. Open communication is the biggest thing a relationship needs to work!If u have.. what did he say?? If he doesnt want to, tell him how important it is to you.. You want to be happy and if he cant make you happy, then you have to make yourself happy by starting your life all over again somewhere else with someone new!!
Goood Luck!!
2007-01-06 01:51:30 · answer #1 · answered by 88776 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might be your age, i'm 27 and have just been through a major re-evaluation of my life and fely very stuck. You have to braek all these things down. First of all set a time limit on paying back your debts. Star making friends or contact old friends. Talk to your man about a long didtant relationship while you visit home for a while to see how that goes, because sometimes we look back in rose coloured glasses and think we want something again only to find we don't. Also sound like you just want to run away as life is tough ( i know that feeling). Make a plan it will ease the resentment
Good luck
2007-01-06 02:13:11 · answer #2 · answered by sammyantha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In order for your life to change hun, YOU have to change it! I know it seems hard but you really just have to set your priorities. I know you love your boyfriend but if he is dragging you down then you probally need to let him go. I know there are alot of other aspects to why you feel you cannot leave London, but your boyfriend seems to be a big part of it. Everyone has debt sweetie, and we all just do what we can on a daily basis to pay it all off. It never happens overnight, and no matter how hard you try or how long you wait, you can never go back to being 17. There will NEVER be a way to do that. Try downsizing your life....meaning move in with a friend or something and pay your debt off. I dont know how many US dollars translates into 1700 pounds, but if it is 1700 dollars, its not a terribly huge debt. I just think you are feeling overwhelmed and there is nothing wrong with that, we all get that way at times. But mainly, you need to focus on doing what will make your spirit soar. Get out of London, go get some friends, focus on paying your debt...After you get a handle on things you will feel better about alot of things. Good Luck.
2007-01-06 01:52:48 · answer #3 · answered by babyj248 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seriously change it, you need to decide what YOU want to do, he may have the job of a lifetime but you gotta do what you want or you will acrry on regretting what you didn't. You can get an unsecured loan. Why cant you leave and pay the loan back from spain? Myabe a long distance relationship for a while if your boyfriend wants to stay in his job for now. Do what you want! Dont keep making excuses or you will still be in the same place in another 10 years.
2007-01-06 02:39:40 · answer #4 · answered by I~Love~Baileys 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really hate it you must really change it! If you want to go back to Spain go. If you want to stay with your boyfriend stay.
Go to night school, join a club, do Latin American dancing as hobby, pay your debt £5 a month, explain to them you have financial difficulty. If you feel suicidal talk to your doc, if this is the case how much do you really love your boyfriend?
Read local paper - whats on in your area! There is lots of ways you could make life more enjoyable especially if you have found your partner in life and he is worth staying alive for - can't quite understand why you are so miserable if you are in love!
Perhaps you just need a holiday and visit you relatives, at least save towards doing so if you are homesick.
Good Luck and BE HAPPY
2007-01-06 01:57:36 · answer #5 · answered by Jewel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just a question... he has the job of HIS life, and he is the man of YOUR life. You have made massive sacrifices for him - is he helping you with your debt? After 5 years, is he making the same noises as you about staying together forever?
Or are you just making a lot of sacrifices so that he can stay happy - is it time to think about what YOU want?
Are there really no other career moves for you? For example agencies in London who are looking for bilingual people with (let's say) admin skills - you must have other skills if you could get a decent job in Spain?
Good luck!
2007-01-06 03:30:47 · answer #6 · answered by MIchelle H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you just leave things as they are you will never be happy. If you keep concentrating on how bad your life is it will never change. You need a positive attitude and you need to be prepared to take risks. Look for other jobs, there must be plenty of other jobs for you to do. If you continue on this path i think i can guarantee your boyfriend will stop being so patient and give up on the relationship, it cant be fun for him listening to you moan about your life all of the time.
Its a new year, and time for a new positive life for you!
2007-01-06 01:53:47 · answer #7 · answered by gingajen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should talk to your boyfriend and if he is dead set against not moving then maybe he doesnt care as much as you do if you've stayed in hell for 5 years just so he can have a good job. I think that if he cares about you as much as it sounds like you care about him you two are a great couple, you should be able to talk to him and he should be able to listen. Or is it's his fault not yours.
2007-01-06 01:50:18 · answer #8 · answered by bessy_1962 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you truly love him, you'll stay with him forever whatever he wants to do. what do you want to do with life? you can do anything you want here, you don't just need to work in a shop! www.learndirect.co.uk could help you with courses if you want to get qualified for a certain ambition of yours. you only live once, and God has put you in this country, so make the most out of it! :) xx
2007-01-06 02:36:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations that you have admitted it is your faulkt that you have no friends.
Now take the next step and DO something about it.
BE a friend and you will make friends.
It may help to find someone neutral that you can talk to.
2007-01-06 02:27:27 · answer #10 · answered by alan h 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋