Boyfriend is very emotional?

Question

My boyfriend and I live together we have been together for a year and a half we are saving money to get out life together going. everything seems like we are getting things going in the right direction. Only problem is, sometimes he is too emotional and it really gets to me. We talk about it over and over and it just seems like it always gets into an arguement. He is dependant on me as far as a car and rides to work. when I'm at work he just stays at home.. he doesn't seem to have any personal outlets other than the internet when I'm not home. Sometimes I feel absolutely smothered. When I'm tired and don't want sex he gets hurt and thinks we have serious issues in the relationship. Basically when he's miserable (which is alot) I'm miserable. He doesn't like going out with friends after midnight and checks up on my activity online and doesn't like me going to the store or for a drive by myself. I feel like I need a break, but if I say that he gets hurt and round 2 starts all over again.

Answer 1

Hmm well there must be a root to the problem

Have u ever cheated on him ?? If u have betrayed him like that..THERE is ur problem.

otherwise show him more love..you are lucky to have a bf who loves you..

Answer 2

This is probably the last thing you're going to do but the first thing you should.

Get rid of him. This part is going to be a little more difficult and may involve the help of several of your friends or family even.

Bottom line: if he's so emotional and doesn't seem to have a job for that matter he hardly sounds like he's holding up his half of "your relationship." What are you doing with your life spending it with him? Do you actually believe that you can change him or help him?

He may change. But if he does it's going to be the result of changes he made in his life.

Do this: get a couple friends to take him somewhere. he's going to have to get out of your (apartment?) place so either you (with some help) can pack his things or you can pack your things.

You need a break alright. So either pack your things or his. If you pack yours make sure you cut off all utilities (phone, electricity whatever has your name on it). As well as be off the lease if you're renting.

Meet him in a neutral public place and tell him - face to face - it's over. Why neutral? So he is less likely to have a hissy fit when you face up to him. Also make sure someone is going to call you (like 15 minutes) after you meet him for breakfast. Safety check.

I've seen this before and I'm talking about personal experience but you're gonna do what you're gonna do.

Answer 3

I think there is some underlying problems. Does he work or not, your question has this conflicts in it. You ride him to work and yet he is at home when you are at work. He sounds obsessed with you and that could mean real problems later on. If you are worried about it now. Your instincts are telling you there is trouble in heaven all ready. You say you are living together for a year and a half, how long do you know this guy before you moved in with him. And if you are asking this question this early in the game, you are really telling yourself he is not for you and you have doubts. I really don't belive you when you say things are going in the right direction. I would go another direction and without him

Answer 4

Dear i think it's a big problem that he don't want to be independent in the car and to g to the shop alone, so u must to be careful and ask him why and open the conversation, look dear don't be afraid from him to get hurt, u just hurt yourself more and more if u not talking, and if now u are not talking when u have a babies u will feel that u want t divorce because he is nothing in home, just a machine in front of the computer nothing to do, did u check what he is doing in the computer allot of men i know that doing chat and meeting girls on line.
and about the sex, if u are tired he must understand u not to care about him self, like he is selfish i think, u must to be aware, and if the relationship u are into control it the heart nothing will change u must to think in your brain not in your heart u just afraid to hurt him, do u think he afraid to hurt u, if he does so why he treat u like that, be aware what is going on, just think twice and talk to him and tell him the truth what u feel and think because it will help.

Answer 5

You need to talk to him, and in your past talks with him, it's turned to an argument. But you need to let him know that when you don't want to have sex it's not the end of the world, you just had a long day. You need to let him know that you love him but he is overreacting. Usually when people get emotional over you and your choices it's because they are unstable about themselves and don't understand your reasons for your choices. You just need to clearly explain to him that not everything has to do with a huge thing in your relationship, it's just thats how you feel that day or you're busy, or whatever.

Answer 6

Has he seen a doctor to see if he may need a little help with depression???
Sounds like it couldn't hurt. I would feel smothered also.....
He sounds VERY insecure & clingy... It would make me absolutely nuts to be around someone like that. At least if he were a friend you would get a break, but since you live together & his spying on you that would be WAY TOOOOOO MUCH FOR ME!!!!!

Answer 7

Reverse that and you have the situation I put my ex in. I was so afraid that he would never come back that I coveted every moment he spent with me...and when he needed to go somewhere even just out for cigs...I smothered him when he got back...sickening isn't it. I lost him because I didn't let him be free...He was a good man...

Communicate...communicate... communicate...I was getting stronger about myself and how good I felt when he was around and if we could have communicated, I mean I could tell him I need reassurrance and he could say I need you to smother me less.. I probably wouldn't be in front of this damn computer now...

Answer 8

Emotional isn't the word I would use... Sounds like he is extremely needy, insecure and controlling. There really isn't much you can do about it, he has to deal with his issues; just keep in mind that he will not change, and if you choose to stay with this man you will have to put up with more and more of this same thing. Can you do it? No one can answer this but you.

Answer 9

Well look at it this way you know you can't live like this, what your doing now, so I would just put it point blank to him and try to compromise alittle on both sides or simple let him know that if he's not willing to try, that hey it's probably not gonna work! May be you have to be a little stubborn about this, because it sounds as though he's used to getting his own way? But this is just my opinion . sunnydays

Answer 10

easily, what's she doing? Why is she jeopardizing your courting to maintain one with an previous flame? Who cares in the event that they used to bypass to intense college mutually! As mature adults, one would desire to earnings the appropriateness, or lack thereof, of specific movements. And it is for sure irrelevant. the certainty that she slept together with her ex top when you broke up ability that she grew to become into no longer being completely up front with you pertaining to to her lingering thoughts. Now, 4 years later, she nevertheless feels the would desire to stay in touch? what's that approximately? i could be very weary approximately this! you're able to desire to place you foot down. She's already deliberate a gathering with out your understanding. that's no longer the suited habit of a spouse. a marriage is a merging of lives and it sounds like your spouse nevertheless has an entire life of her very own she isn't being so forthright approximately. it isn't any longer honest to you on your spouse to proceed this secret courting together with her ex. because of the fact that they had a sexual courting, how specific are you able to be that this piece of email is precisely platonic. you're able to desire to allow her understand that it is unacceptable and that it makes you no longer have faith her. If she cares sufficient pertaining to to the vows she promised forever, she would be in a position to stop her touch with this guy and concentration that factor on her marriage. stable success.

Answer 11

The first half of your story sounds like you have a 6-year-old son, not a boyfriend. The second half of your story sounds like you have a jailer, not a boyfriend.
Does that sound like a healthy relationship to you?