I am a straight female who has always been bi-curious. I work with this lesbian who I really want. We seem to always talk since she comes around, but only at work. I joined the gym she goes to, to be around her, but, she really never wants to hang out. I finally have told her that I was interested in hanging out with her and doing whatever. To play it safe, I told her that I wasn't going after her, that I just wanted to hang out with her. She said that's too bad. She will make little comments like that. I've given her my number and told her many times to call me. She never does. When I avoid her, she comes around and tries to talk to me and will ask me to go get some coffee, and bring it back to the office. I have told her that I just read a book on sex stories of Lesbians. I also have told her that I would love to go with her to a nude beach. She doesn't take me up on any of it. Yet, she makes comments to me. If I ignore her, she comes around. I don't know what to make of it. Help.
2007-01-05 16:18:38 · 12 answers · asked by Weasel Girl 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
she is like alot of men she likes the fact that you want her even more when she ignores her that kind of gets her off so to speak.. I think since she is ignoring all your blatant attempts then you need to just leave it alone.. cause if you continue to invest so much time chasing her you are going to get feelings and if it doesnt turn out to be anything you may get hurt.
2007-01-05 16:21:38 · answer #1 · answered by Amazing_clarity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's chosen to stay with her husband despite not enjoying sex with him - so I would say it's pretty certain that even if you ever did have an affair with her, she wouldn't be leaving him. So the first question really is, could you bear that? It's not good fun for anyone, straight, lesbian or gay, to have a relationship with someone who is committed to another person - you're always just having to be grateful for the crumbs of time they are willing to spend with you. Personally, I'd say it's hell to get into that situation and does very little for one's self-esteem. It's hard not to end up feeling resentful - I've seen it happen to several friends. But if you REALLY think you can hack it, without any illusion that she's going to leave him, then I'd say keep the flirtation going, and take an opportunity to give her a hug in a 'friendly' way - if she responds, you can take it from there, otherwise it was just a friendly hug, right?
2016-05-22 21:59:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
personally i think she likes you. This being because you have totally described myself. I do the exact same thing. And the reason i act uninterested is because I like the thrill of the hunt, but I actually get scared if someone shows inerest back and i back off. But when I feel tht we're far enough apart or she starts to ignore me, i will come back. it's like a push and pull situation. It's not healthy, especially for the one I like. But it's because I get scared of what could be. Maybe she's the same way. I would tell her how you feel. OR you can lay on the flirting pretty heavy and see how she acts.
2007-01-05 16:36:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a hundred percent sure if this will work in this situation, but it gets results in straight encounters. Stop beating around the bush; tell her that you think she is beautiful (smart, etc, whatever you truly think of her) and flat out ask her if she is interested in a relationship with you, sexual or emotional, whatever. It sounds like she isn't interested in your awkward little tests, but it also sounds like you haven't honestly asked her if she's interested, just joked around, which gave out mixed signals. If you flat out ask her, she will either tell you no or yes, and then you can continue on from there.
2007-01-05 16:29:09 · answer #4 · answered by Amy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bite the bullet, get her number, call and ask her out. Although don't be surprised if she turns you down. Most lesbians do not want to be someone's bi-curious try out fling. It isn't fun and all we do is get hurt. Good Luck though:)
2007-01-05 16:21:01 · answer #5 · answered by Shawn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the person you need to talk to about this is her. It's time to ask her what's going on, as well as to be completely honest with her.
2007-01-05 16:21:35 · answer #6 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to stop fishing off the company pier!! Find somene else, she's making the right choice.
2007-01-05 16:21:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just casually touch her every now & then. See how she reacts. Ask her to go to dinner or lunch sometime. Good luck.
2007-01-05 16:20:03 · answer #8 · answered by IMHO 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just like you she's a chick, you all play games! come, you know the deal.
2007-01-05 16:21:06 · answer #9 · answered by sgtgregg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
http://www1.webng.com/xcsnowrider
2007-01-05 16:19:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋