Ban divorce or make it harder to get married?

Question

Do you think we should ban divorce (with some outs like abuse and adultery)

or make it harder to get married like making couples go through counseling so they dont rush

a consitutional amendment wouldnt be unconstitutional.

how would it increase crime.

no problem with my marriage, never was married.

Answer 1

I think that if your already married you should go through counseling before you can get a divorce...and make it harder for a couple to get married_

Answer 2

Tough question and I guess when you start putting stipulations on marriage and divorce things get more complicated. Let's face it, divorce and marriage are big business in today's world. Imagine who would come out against banning divorce? I think lawyers would fight this to the ends of the earth. I think it should be harder to get a divorce, but putting a ban on it may not be the best thing. People make good decisions and bad ones. If someone chooses a bad partner, not necessarily abusive or an adulterer, they should not be stuck with them because of a ban. I agree that more direction like counseling may be key. But I would take it one step further. Counseling before and during the marriage may be more of a deterrent to divorce than a ban. The problem is there is a cost to counseling. I agree with you though, there needs to be a better way of dealing with divorce. I just don't think a ban is the answer.

Answer 3

Banning divorce will not work because you can't legislate how people are going to feel and act. People will separate and go on with their lives whether or not they can dissolve the marriage legally. And as a counselor, I know that counseling only works with those people who are open to it and ready for it, so that's no solution either. The people who are not ready for marriage are often the ones least likely to realize it whether or not they get counseling.

I personally think that our societal expectations of marriage need to change, and perhaps the laws surrounding marriage should change to reflect that. It might be unrealistic in our modern society to expect everyone to stay hitched till death do them part. Perhaps marriage should be renegotiated and renewed every 5-7 years on a contractual basis. I am just throwing out an idea, not offering a solution. I just think that marriage as a lifetime union may be a passe idea or one that doesn't meet the needs of modern people. Not everyone is hooked into a romantic ideal or a storybook romance version of marriage. In fact, in ages past it was looked upon as more of a practical arrangement. The only reason it was expected to last for a lifetime is because in ages past the average lifetime didn't last all that long and even if one did find oneself alone again it would be difficult to find another partner in many situations. Today life is much longer and there is much more opportunity to get remarried. Plus we don't need the security of being married as much anymore. Now individuals can be more self sufficient and don't need a partner to keep them alive. In earlier ages marriage often meant the difference between having food and perhaps going hungry since the basic survival duties were divided between men and women. So that's why I say that maybe the answer is that we need to rethink and reformulate the concept of marriage itself and not look for ways to force people into being married or keep them from marrying against their will.

Answer 4

Neither one is possible.
It will only help to increase crime rate.
There is no guarantee of future what so ever you say.
What are you trying to fix, nothing is broken how can you fix it.
You say divorce with exception, so if someone wants a divorce he or she will opt that route and what will be the result?
You say counselling before marriage, yes to an extend it is good but ultimately I will marry the person I like, you (counsellor) can say anything who cares?
I am not sure what prompted to make such suggestion, but it seems you are having some problems and probably you need more counselling. Please help yourself.
God helps those who help themselves.
God Bless You.

Answer 5

well banning divorce isnt a good reason bc then if u do have a good reason like u stated abuse or adultery and counseling thats not always gonna work either but here n my state u have to take that and even if u get a divorce u have to take classes in it before the judge wil grant it

Answer 6

A marriage is a consensual relationship between two people. In fact, it exists only as a personal commitment between them, one to the other. That commitment is in the heart- not in the words. If you didn't bring commitment to the alter, you don't leave with it.

The legal aspect of marriage is a shell imposed by uninvolved people, such as church and state. It does not change the commitment one way or the other; only the legal complexity of the situation.

It is impossible for church or state to form or dissolve the actual marriage; the commitment. They can only act on the shell- which is basically a non-vested party interfering with individual rights anyway. They succeed mostly in confusing people's understanding of what marriage really is.

Do you think that forcing people who hate each other to stay together solves any problems? Or forcing those who love each other to live together by common-law solves any problems?

The legal status of marriage is irrelevant, even harmful to the real state of marriage. People think that being married incurs obligations to love, while love actually exists only as a gift. Once you owe someone love- it's a payment, and you resent it being seen that way.

Let's let people learn for themselves. They will make mistakes. Let them correct those mistakes and get on with their lives without criticism and abuse from people who aren't involved anyway.

Answer 7

I agree. I also agree with Melissa Etheridge about how gay people shouldn't pay their taxes because they're not fully recognized as citizens with rights!! Even IF the bible says it's wrong (which is highly questionable due to contextual errors), isn't that mixing religion and politics?? Aren't we supposed to be guaranteed a seperation of church and state...especially since the government doesn't recognize an OFFICIAL religion? Therefore the argument that so may try to use that "the bible says it's wrong" is null and VOID.

Answer 8

The church is already doing this (Catholic church, for example); and for the state to impose such laws would be bordering on unconstitutional. There's a price we pay for living in a "free country" - being able to marry and divorce at will is one of the "perks". Those who are not happy with it could probably apply for citizenship in a Taliban-controlled nation.

Answer 9

Make couples go through premarital counseling. Dr. Laura said it and I totally agree.

Answer 10

i'm military and i see/know WAY WAY to many people that get married for $$ or to get to a better place, so i say make it harder to get married like make sure the people actually like eachother! it would be nice if the families knew about it and couseling w/someone to make sure they know what they are getting into!