2007-01-05 13:56:39 · 9 answers · asked by BETTY E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How heartbreaking, complicated, and messy.
There are only two options that are clearly defined. Everything else falls into a very secretive, unhappy web of emotions.
* Leave the ones you are married to, and be with the one you truly love,
or
*Try to make your existing marriages work, and no longer see the one you love.
I'm sorry that I don't have better news, but being halfway in and halfway out of two relationships will tear your hearts and lives apart.
Good luck to you, and I hope this helps. :)
2007-01-05 14:04:47 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh Betty--please be careful. I had the identical problem and resisted for a long time what was between us. Then he convinced me that we belonged together...'soulmates and all'...and because I loved him and we were best friends I thought maybe he was right. A year and a half later--he asks me to marry him--have children and etc...Just wait 6 more months...I do and a month ago he tells me its over---his wife is pregnant...but he 'still' loves me. I am in so much pain I don't feel like I can face another day--especially since we work together and I have to watch the happy family develop before my eyes. I still love him but I also hate him. I feel as if there is no where to turn with my emotions. Somedays I want to go to his house and confront both of them--it just seems so unfair that he gets to live happily ever after and not even care about the damage he's done. Please please please--leave your partners first....or you'll end up where I am.
2007-01-05 22:54:03 · answer #2 · answered by dropdead g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love the one you are with?
Yes?- let the friend go and try to do things for your spouse to show him how much you love him. You will see, in at least one way, the two are the same. And that is why you love them both.
No?- then end the first relationship before getting involved in another. Cheating only hurts everyone involved, including yourself.
Can you still be friends? Either way, the relationship will never be the same. Whether or not you can "make it work" depends on how deep the love is; however, true love should not be forced into "making it work". I can tell you that it will be best for all, if you let one of them go.
2007-01-05 22:22:39 · answer #3 · answered by spoiledbrat30x3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing you need to do is figure out if you love this person or lust them. If your marriage or theirs is both bad marriages then get out of it. If it is a good marriage then dont mess it up over a what if scenario. Let it go and work on being in love with your spouse. If you are no longer in love with your spouse then maybe you should let them know this! After that if things dont get any better then end it and be with the one you love.
2007-01-05 22:27:02 · answer #4 · answered by the fireman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to fully close one door before you open another. If your respective marriages do not work, get divorced and then try to be with one another. It might work, stranger things have happened, and the pursuit of happiness is never an easy road. Good luck.
2007-01-05 22:00:28 · answer #5 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sorry but I don't know what you are asking exactly. If you are in love with someone then forget about the others and try to make it work.
2007-01-05 21:59:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think those friends need to look at the fact that each of them made a committment to someone else and is being unfaithful. I think that if they intend to remain friends, that is okay and yes, it can work. You simply need to include their new best friends on occasion.
2007-01-05 22:01:23 · answer #7 · answered by nkorb1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so Ur saying Ur married but in love with Ur Friend?? i don't understand the Q ...sorry
2007-01-05 22:00:29 · answer #8 · answered by amal L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope shouldnt do it
2007-01-05 21:59:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋