My son was 14 when he last lived with his dad and his dad used to hit him a lot and I never knew about it and I hit him once and I called him a slut and a few other things. He is 17 now and I really want his custodety, he lives with his 21 yr old friend and his grandmother (who sued for his custodety in the first place) lets him. He won't come live with me because my husband locked him in the closet once.
Someone on here said that was abuse... was that abuse?
2007-01-05 13:14:30 · 23 answers · asked by 4g3t1t 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
First off, I know kids can get you angry from time to time, but you should NEVER have hit your child or call him names. Your husband locking him in a closet is definatly abusive behavior. I can't say I blame the kid for not wanting to be in your home. Please don't take this the wrong way, but you, as his mother, should be standing up for your boy. It sounds like your husband is a real jerk if he's got to pick on a teenager. Sorry.
2007-01-05 13:21:54 · answer #1 · answered by bluegrass 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Is this a real question, or one that is made up to get a rise out of the readers? I'll act like it's real: yes, "that" is abuse. "That" being what your husband did, what you did, and what his father did. It's a damn shame, but it doesn't sound like this boy has ever had a stable loving family.
I'm not saying living with a 21 y o friend is a good thing, but I don't know enough to say it isn't the best option he has. If you had said you knew things were bad before and you had been working on being a better parent, I'd be wishing you all the best of luck.
2007-01-05 13:52:43 · answer #2 · answered by Rachel F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you hit him once. do you mean you spanked him once or hit him and left a bruise? There is a big difference.
DO YOU GET VISITATION RIGHTS/
He is 17 I would focus on having a nice relationship with my child THEN trying to get back custody. No matter what happens when he turns 18 he can do what ever he wants. So focus on minding and broken feelings, and grow as a person and grow as a family. Try with spending time, and when he turns 18 he can move back if he wants.
i do agree locking a child in a closet is a form of abuse.
This would have been his step-dad or real dad?
2007-01-05 13:24:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Locking your son in a closet is abuse. I might suggest counseling for your husband and son. That might help. Why do you want custody of your son? If it is because you love him - then that is great and it is a help. But if you just want custody because of money or something else - I doubt he will come to live with you.
2007-01-05 13:26:47 · answer #4 · answered by Lynn B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it to me. You say he hit him a lot. That would be abuse. If he is 17 he is almost an adult by most state's standards and there would be little point in having him move back in with you. If your spouse hits him then he is better off living somewhere else (even with his twenty-one-year-old friend).
2007-01-05 13:21:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
um yeah. if you dont think that hitting your son and calling him names is abuse you arnt fit to be a parent. I almost said mom, but anyone who hits their children does not deserve that title either. Let him go. He'll be better off w/o you or his dad
2007-01-05 13:19:08 · answer #6 · answered by amana5 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is old enough to know where he wants to be and, yes, I see some abuse issues here. Why would anyone lock another person in a closet? that's bad.........
2007-01-05 14:22:49 · answer #7 · answered by tcbtoday123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was it abuse you are dang right its abuse. Go sit in a closet, close the door, pretend to be a kid and think about how scary and awful it must have been.
2007-01-05 13:19:34 · answer #8 · answered by Amberlyn4 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sure sounds like abuse to me.
I hate it when parents think they can treat their kids like 'things'--- no respect, no love.
Often the abusive parent was abused himself as a kid--- but so what? Why not learn from their own pain and stop the cycle!!
2007-01-05 14:16:16 · answer #9 · answered by Rani 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
THAT IS NOTHING,BUT ABUSE TO LOCK A CHILD IN A CLOSET. THE HITTING, NAME CALLING IS ALSO ABUSE. THIS REMINDS ME OF MY EX SON- IN - B****** LOCKING MY 3 YEARS OLD GRANDSON IN HIS ROOM. REVERSED THE DOOR KNOB, SO HE COULD LOCKED HIM IN HIS BED ROOM. I HATE THE B******. MY GRANDSON IS 17 NOW AND HAS SOME PROBLEMS OVER IT.
2007-01-05 13:49:42 · answer #10 · answered by bettys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋