I have two friends who recently came out. They didn't "turn" straight because it's trendy, I believe they were born that way. Yet, before they came out they behaved and spoke like typical guys...but now they have completely succumbed to that stupid stereotype, lispy voice, "girlish" clothing, limp wrists and all.
I'm fully supportive of gay people and I believe they are equals to everyone else, but why do some of the men think they have to be like that just because they're gay? Most women don't even act like that. Don't people realize that following stereotypes hurts your demographic?
2007-01-05 12:30:27 · 7 answers · asked by transitangst 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Kedar: It "bothers" me in the sense that they are only hurting themselves. I'm not gay, but it doesn't mean I can't care about my fellow human being. It's the same as when I see another black person being stereotypical because they think they "have to".
2007-01-05 12:39:06 · update #1
The same reason some people drink around friends to fit in, or smoke around friends to fit in, or cuss around another group of friends to fit in.
Everybody wants to "fit in" with their crowd, and many people think the fast lane to success is to mimic what they see in their peers.
You and I both know this is yawn-o-rama. Far better to be yourself, and let others accept you for who you are, or get the heck out of our way!!!!!!
By the by, I am gay, and masculine, so is my partner, and so are the majority of our gay friends. Not that we dont like effeminate gays, we just prefer to be around others who make us feel more comfortable.
2007-01-05 13:23:21 · answer #1 · answered by Gabzilla 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Regarding the reason it bothers you: you're on the outside, and it's not your place to tell us how to fight our fight. That said, I think a lot of (especially younger) people do tend to think that they have to do certain things to "fit in" with a gay community that they have, up to that point, had little if any exposure to. Many of these people will discover this and tone back down. Others were suppressing their true selves all along, and you're only now starting to see it (there's sometimes a major desire to anti-stereotype while in the closet; kind of like over-compensating). Other guys do it out in public just so people know they're gay: straight people who are assholes will reveal themselves as such (thus keeping us from getting emotionally invested in a friendship that's only going to end nastily anyway) and other gay men will "know" that if nothing else, this person is used to being mistaken for gay even if they're straight. It marks you as approachable. It doesn't matter what most women act like; it's never been about that.
2007-01-05 19:10:09 · answer #2 · answered by Atropis 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, I don't want to be stereotyped as well. I also dislike effeminate gays. But it doesn't mean I hate them. I just don't want to be seen as such and it all stems from one's level of comfort and degree of liberation.
I prefer to behave like any straight guy do because there are people who prefer discreet guys. I believe it is a matter of social grouping. Effem gays tend to be more carefree and would normally pursue professions that are typically gay (fashion, hairstyle, cosmetics). While the discreet gays pursue the other side of the coin (construction, IT, hospitality, etc.).
I guess we, gays, have made our own conventions as to how we should behave.
2007-01-05 15:01:36 · answer #3 · answered by nomamalin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
everybody of each and every orientation is able to enhancing their habit a minimum of to a pair volume in accordance to their conscious or subconscious possibilities. there is little if something you and that i will do approximately it in maximum situations. considering the fact that this is the way it somewhat is, I say, i do no longer likely care how different individuals act. You and that i've got the alternative of being with the individuals we ought to be with, and staying removed from those we don't want to be with. the only element that i think of ought to be distinctive is this: only as right now human beings do no longer in the present day condemn all different right now human beings of the intercourse in question for what they provide concept to an undersireable action through a definite right now individual or persons, neither ought to all gay human beings of a definite intercourse be condemned through right now human beings for the strikes of a definite gay individual or persons. yet we see human beings doing that each and all of the time, assuming that if one or some gay adult adult males, case in point, do something they provide concept to obnoxious, all gay adult adult males ought to do it and all gay adult adult males are responsible. it may be comparable to if right now ladies pronounced that each and every person right now adult adult males are responsible for male on woman rape.
2016-11-26 22:45:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't behave "effeminate", not sure why some do. Does that bother you?
2007-01-05 12:37:12 · answer #5 · answered by Kedar 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think its because some of them were around girls alot?..LOL i dont know..but i think that might have something to do with it.
2007-01-05 12:42:10 · answer #6 · answered by BlondBoy 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
TELL THEM! Not us! Trust me, you may be doing them the favor, after all your their friend! : )
2007-01-05 13:02:05 · answer #7 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋