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I have a seriouse problem and i don't know if it is my fault or my husbands...

He has wondering eyes meaning a goodlooking woman can't go passed without a good look from him!
Also at the supermarkets or chemists or any where we go on a regular basis there are girls that i know he likes and has too comment on (when we are home never infront of them, that would be worse) but its normally around bed time... he will start talking about them,especially when we are about too have sex and a couple of times he has let their names slip out during sex... no one is off limits.friends, collegues even my sister! the worst thing is that it is changing my attitude toward these people...i can't look them in the eye, i can't talk to them! and i am normally pretty friendly especially with retail worker i figure they cope enough abuse!
I find i have a huge wall built up around me!

Please help me how can i change my attitude, and satisfy my husbnds insationable appatite?

2007-01-05 10:19:38 · 20 answers · asked by elfsbabe 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

come on people this is a real question.... obviously i am not going too leave him otherwise i wouldn't have posted the question. I am not a weak person.

I Should also add we have 2 young children 4&1 girls...

its not as simple as leaving him.

i just want too know that other people see it as wrong too!

2007-01-05 14:33:29 · update #1

20 answers

Look ! A man with high testosterone has thoughts.
There is a trillion combinations of what to do with those thoughts.
It is all part of nature.
It is how one puts those thoughts into action that determines the level of health, and usually it remains within its safety zone.
Fantasy is another field on the same farm.
The secret is to find that part which both parties have in common.
If you are uncomfortable with the way your husband processes the thoughts he has daily, find a happy medium.
Put the flavour in strangers if you must, but do not deny your husband freedom to express his thoughts.

2007-01-10 15:59:47 · answer #1 · answered by tillermantony 5 · 0 0

I'm sorry, the chemists? do you frequent a chemist?

anyways, from a psychological standpoint, he is winning. He is trying to drive you away from your friends and family. And it sounds like its working. Some guys use force, some use psychology. This can easily be classified as emotional abuse. You need to seek professional help to know what can be done and if the problem can be resolved or if you need to leave. Be prepared though, you may be left with no other option than to leave.

ps. I'm not in the bedroom with you nor am I in his mind, but I have a feeling that those "slips" were not slips at all.

2007-01-05 10:23:14 · answer #2 · answered by your_name_here 3 · 0 0

I know guys can't help but look at beautiful women but he should not look at them while he is with you. You don't have to change your attitude, your husband is disrespecting you as a person. You should not allow this to continue. How can he even think of calling out another person's name before he has sex with you? You should tell him to get off you and don't have sex with him. He needs counselling. I am sorry, he is an Ass.

2007-01-05 10:30:56 · answer #3 · answered by Paul 4 · 0 0

I don't think it's your attitude that needs to be changed. He is mentally abusing you. He is disrespecting you. He is giving you low self-esteem and controlling you and you may not even realize it. I highly suggest that you go to counseling. If he won't go with you, go alone.
My husband likes to look, and honestly, so do I. That's human nature. However, talking about it and saying the names during sex takes it over the edge. I really don't understand why you think it's something that you're doing wrong, because it's not.
Good luck to you!

2007-01-05 10:24:55 · answer #4 · answered by Josi 5 · 0 0

It's not your attitude that needs changing, it's his. And it's not your duty to satisfay his insatiable appetite.
Your husband is acting like an immature, moronic teenager. And he obviously has no respect for either you or any other female. If I were you, I'd seriously re-consider spending my life with a cheater waiting to happen.

2007-01-05 10:25:41 · answer #5 · answered by Liz 7 · 0 0

Well for starters you need to address this issue with your husband. It maybe that he is doing it without really knowing he is doing it. some people say things but aren't really aware that they are hurting the other person. So say something. And if it persist, maybe you should do it towards guys...just sp he knows how it feels, and maybe that would make him stop as well!

2007-01-05 10:25:12 · answer #6 · answered by OPTIMUS DIME 3 · 0 0

Oh goodness! i'm undecided i'd desire to bypass as quickly as a month... Has he continually been this style? i could have a great number of questions if he hasn't "continually" been like this. i understand from 2 of my sister-in-rules that the two certainly one of my brothers have been as quickly as a month form of adult men. My oldest brother went so far as going to his pcp and a therapist to work out why his intercourse rigidity grew to become into so low. there are a number of reasons for a guy of that age to have little choose for making love, yet while it is interfering along with your sexual choose i could say something or ask if he could be prepared to work out a expert? i could in spite of the undeniable fact that be irritating if this habit is something new... i could suspect that he grew to become into cheating or being untrue? And via cheating i do no longer imply that he's inevitably having "intercourse" with yet another female, yet i could be careful. stable success to you and your intercourse existence!! :D

2016-10-06 12:16:26 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Your husband is not your problem.....you are your own problem. You are enabling his behavior to continue. He is a womanizer and you are still having sex with him? You seem to have no personal boundaries or self-esteem. You need to seek out therapy since you are not going to change his behavior so don't even waste your time trying. If you continue to put up with this relationship then stop your whining!

2007-01-05 10:26:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

Husbands mistress?

2016-10-08 01:37:13 · answer #9 · answered by Bevvy 6 · 0 0

Its your husbands problem, I personally wouldn't stand for that sort of behavior. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. If he doesn't see anything wrong with it after you say how you feel, then there is something majorly wrong with the situation.

2007-01-05 10:26:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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