I miss my deployed husband?

Question

My husband deployed to Iraq about 2 months ago. Although I get to talk to him regularly onthe phone and we write each other often, I miss the the physical intimacy. I would never cheat on him, never ever. I waited my whole life to give him virginity and the same went for him. Our wedding night was a first for both of us, so I have the self control and can't imagine being with anyone else. I just never realized how hard it can be to have your husband gone for so long. Have any other wives/girlfriends been in similar situations and if so how did you deal? (This is a serious question. If you are going to give a perverted answer do me a favor and don't)

I know some of you may mean well, but neither one of us do "toys".

Answer 1

My husband was deployed for two years. It was hard in the beginning, but eventually I adjusted to it. Our children kept me quite busy. When I would start to miss the physical intimacy, I would put that energy into something else constructive. Needless to say, it never hurts to write your feelings down. I would send my husband letters when I got in the mood. As a matter of fact, his unit has been activated again and there are chances now that he may have to go back. So, I 'll be in your situation really soon again.

Just think of how fun it will be when he comes home. My husband came home March of 2005. We had a baby May of 2006. We had a lot of making up to do. Take care!! Your husband as well as all of the soldiers are continually in my prayers and thoughts.

Answer 2

Yes it is hard to deal with. It's not about the sex. It's about the person being there. Felling their touch. Smelling their scent. Feeling the comfort they give you. I hope that you can remain strong. Remember, he too misses you for the same reason. Far too often we here about soldiers going to war, going away to train. Only to return and find that his wife or gf has moved on. That is so sad. I like to think that these people were never meant to be together anyway.

Remain strong, stay focussed. Avoid going to places that will put you into a temptation situation. There should be a support group set up for the families of deployed soldiers. Contact the unit and get connected.

He will be back and in your arms. This will be hard but make the 2 of you so muc stronger. It may be the difference between being married for the next 50 yrs or being divorced next year. If thats important to you (and I know it is) you know what you have to do.

Peace.

Answer 3

The best thing to do is be true to yourself and your hubby! Sounds like you both love eachother a bunch and although it is really hard you seem to be doing a great job! Probably the best thing you can do is talk to him about it and do little stuff like spray your perfume on letters and he could do the same with his calogne (hoping this doesnt make you miss him more) do you have like a special pillow or tshirt or teddy bear that reminds you of him? Just keep those things close by...and remember it is okay to miss him...that just shows how strong your love is. If you didnt miss him then that would be a bad sign! Also check out some of the military wives clubs so you would have more people to talk to...

Maybe these things could help...that's some of the things I did when my hubby (ex) was out to sea.
PS keep your chin up...your husband is doing good things there and he will be back before you know it!

Answer 4

Try to occupy your mind on many things. If you don't have a hobby maybe find one. Working out is good, just do alot of things that you don't normally do. Stick with it, let it occupy those long hours of every day that you now spend thinking about your husband.

Hang around your female friends, stay away from the men, no sense letting those selfish men ruin a good marriage.

I'd rather be alone than cheat on my wife and have to deal with the guilt of doing something like that.

Sorry i couldn't be of more help. Good Luck, will pray for you and your hubby

Answer 5

Hi there my hubby too is in iraq and not due back till march for r and r ... I deeply miss him but i am lucky as i have the kids to keep me amused .My hubby has been deployed too many times to think about .. I too miss the pysysical side and i have learnt to try not to think about it too much easier said than done i know .I always use a tour to reinvent myself for him and i always stock up on pretty underwear and i look forward to seeing him every day that some how makes it easier for me .Hey i have beer waiting for him in the fridge even now .. he will be feeling the same too try chatting to the other wives as my friends become a lifeline for me whilst he is away ... you will have the honeymoon period again soon good luck sammie xx ( longing for march)

Answer 6

Wow you sound exactly like the wife of a guy I went to high school with. No chance you are a photographer are you? You just need to find something to do. Like the guy I know his wife is doing photography. But take some online classes go home to see your or his family. And stay strong for him. For lonely nights all I can say is maybe watch some movies or talk to people on the phone. But a hobby is great to keep your mind off of things.

Answer 7

I miss my deployed husband?

Answer 8

I haven't been thru what you are going thru. I only wanted to tell you that I realize that the soldiers (both men and women) are not the only ones to suffer during this crisis. My mother once waited for my father during WWII and I'm sure shared your feelings.

I can't offer much comfort other than my respect and my encouragement. I'm sure that you must be a comfort to your husband as he fights for our country. For him to know he has a faithful wife and that he will return to her waiting patiently for him must indeed be a blessing.

Please keep the faith. Let nothing shake you. I do hope you find other wives and husbands who also wait for those they love so that you might have support while you wait for your husband. You have my respect and admiration.

Answer 9

I'm in the same position, my husband has been gone for 3 months now Iraq too and I'm feening like a it's a drug. My husband is coming home for r&r next month! but the time inbetween i'm celibate. I do not like sex toys too much b/c i don't want to just have an orgasim i want to feel him, to be able to scrach his back or feel his arms and chest and toys just don't do it for me my only option it to think about everthing and how great it felt.

Answer 10

If you really, truely love your husband, their is no issue. Just wait it out. My hubby was in Iraq for 15 months. He got to come home 2 times. The months in between were long, but you just deal with it. Do you have children? Do you attend church? Just keep your mind occupied. Best of Luck!