what to do, how would you feel if you knew your mother rejects you so bad, she is so sick, so insane that is?

Question

hard to love her. She cheats you, she does whatever she can to protect the other sons but me. I am a Christian, 52, and I have been learning to accept her. To love is hard, but to accept......please, how to do it? Tell me

Answer 1

What you are facing is very difficult, but you are a Christian and God tells us that we must forgive. He said How can we say we love Him who we haven't seen, and hate someone who we have seen?

If your mother is mentally ill and from what you say, she is, then her rejection of you has nothing to do with who she is or who you are. She is sick - mentally sick.

Love her for one reason and one reason only, because she is your mother. Keep in your mind that if she was well, she would not treat you this way. She is not a normal mother and accept that fact. Forgive her, she doesn't know what she is doing.

I just prayed for you. The Lord will give you peace concerning your mother.

Answer 2

I've learned that to accept is to forgive, and to forgive is to forget. Seriously. Untill you can forget all the bad things that happened in the past you cant accept today. And that is hard when it is constant which is why keeping your distance is an act of love as well. You have to love youself and respect yourself too. You say she has sons, so you aren't leaving her out in the cold. It seems you need some space to really let go of some baggage and when you see her again, like a turtle, let it slide off your back.

Answer 3

There comes a time in your life that you realize the best thing to do is to pull away; pulling away is painful; I know I've made that decision once in my life; only my mom was a great actress; never liked me at all, but she sure had me fooled. I finally learned the truth the hard way, we all envision our moms loving us, as I did once, but that was never the case.
The reality is you did not choose her as well as I did not choose my mom; I had my choice I would've chosen a few other people, yet that's what we ended up with or got.
Accept her for who she is, understand her for who she is; from there all you can do is go on with your life.
As each day passes it will get easier; though it is never easy to let go of a person as important as our mothers.

Answer 4

mothers are just people too, all a woman has to do is spread her legs and she is mommie, no different than before she had children, she doesn't know anymore than she did. why do people expect so much of their mother and father. they are just people learning on the way to the grave. if she was mentally ill before she got knocked up, it isn't going to change when she had kids, it will only get worse.just accept that mom is insane , period , that's it, that's all. you can't wish her mental illness away. if a mentally retarded patient gets molested while in the hospital or school, you aren't going to expect that patient to all the sudden be a good mother because she had a child when she was mentally retarded before the molestation, same difference with your mom.you are plenty old enuf to know this, why will you not accept it? jealousy I imagine.

Answer 5

Forgive her and love her, even if it not reciprocated.

Your a Christian, then be reminded that "it is easy" to love those who love you, not so easy to love those that don't, there is the "test". She is someone wounded by the past and others
you may never know "what" but this dictates her behavior, more than likely "unforgiveness" held in for a great length of time.

"Forgive her" pray that Christ takes the "bad" things from both your hearts and replaces them with only "His" good.

You be the light, shine on her darkness that she may see.

Answer 6

perhaps this is one of those times and situations that you need to sit her down and explain that through the years you've tried sooo hard to love her unconditionally, and forgive numerous times, but with all that frustration building up inside you just can't forgive her anymore, and it's to hard to continually love her for the things she repeatedly keeps doing.

apparently she's not worth the fight, not worth the heartache, to care deeply about. I understand that everyone should get along with their parents, mothers most of all, but it sounds like a diseased relationship that won't get better until something lets go, and i think your mom has unfortunately already let go.

Answer 7

I am 14 and my mother has disowend me and I no how you feel I Just take it and say well at least im alive. Just in courage your mother to love you some say its hard love but I dont beleive in hard love if they dont want to love you then dont love them thats what Ive learnt in the past 6 months.Just keep your chin up and dont let any body put You DOWN.

Answer 8

Just give her a big hug and be way way nicer to her than it would seem that she deserves. She will eventually be overcome with guilt and will open up to you.

Answer 9

Stay away from her. She is toxic. You don't need her in your life.

Answer 10

~You need to forgive her for your sake.~