The thing is that I’m not with the father of my baby who is on the way in a couple of weeks. My baby shower is going to be soon and I don’t really have a lot of communication with the father’s family, but I do with his mother(my ex-mother-in-law)and she told me that even though she’s out of the country for some time I should invite him and his family so they get to meet me and the baby. Please help me with real advised.
2007-01-05 09:03:52 · 22 answers · asked by mom-to-be 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Thank you for all you answens, they are real help full. But if you need more info, i talk with the father is not like we hate each other, the thing is that when i met his family told me that they were happy with our pregnancy but after some time we broke up and i havent had comunication with them and i feel silly and inviting them when is been time since i seen them. Is not that i want gifts is just that i want them to know that not cause we are not together they shouldn't get to know me better and know my baby. And i do whant them to be in my childs life.
2007-01-05 09:43:19 · update #1
It depends on how you would really feel about having them there. Yes, I think it would be a good thing to get to know some of the your babys relatives, but if you feel uncomfotable about it then you should just wait.
It's not like this will be your last chance to meet them also. You could send out birth announcements to them after the baby is born and if you feel comfotable about it, invite them to stop by and see the baby sometime.
You must also remember that you will be dealing with the babys father and his family for many years to come and you should have a good relationship with them. Think of holidays in the years to come and all the times your baby will be with the "other side". You really should know who these people since your child will be around them so much in the future.
If his family wanted to, they could have had a seperate shower for the baby.
However, if you really don't mind all that much, you might just end up with lots more gifts for the baby which won't hurt since it sounds like your pretty much on your own with the baby.
Good luck with your decision. I hope your shower goes well and that you have an easy labor resulting in a healthy baby.
2007-01-05 09:16:22 · answer #1 · answered by bluegrass 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you planning on keeping the father and his family involved with the baby's life? Unless they are horrible people, they deserve to enjoy the new member of their family as well. The baby is half yours and half the fathers (that makes it sound like a posession but that's not what I mean). The thing is, the father might actually love this baby as much as you and his family might love this baby too. I don't think you should keep them from enjoying and being a part of this new life. That is wrong.
Maybe the answer is for you to have a get together with the father's family (like it or not, he and his family ARE a part of your life now) and make it a separate sort of baby shower. The ONLY thing I would be uncomfortable with is feeling like you are asking for gifts from people you don't really know, but if you invite someone who is neutral to the situation that you are friends with it could help you be more comfortable when meeting the father's family.
2007-01-05 09:21:54 · answer #2 · answered by Angela 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This all depends. If there is bad blood between you and the baby's father, I would say no. However, if you are still civil with each other and he's going to be a part of the baby's life, I would say, yes. This is a sticky situation. You can do a courtesy invite, but if there's going to be a lot of drama, then don't bother. It's ultimately up to YOU. You don't need any added stress -- especially on the day of your shower.
Congrats and good luck!
2007-01-05 09:14:17 · answer #3 · answered by JoesWifee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I completely understand if you don't, but i really think you should. Even though you are not with him, his family will probably enjoy going and seeing you while you are pregnant. The more people you have at your baby shower, the more gifts you are going to get for your child. The baby is his responsibility too, let his family help you out as well. You don't want to regret not inviting them later. Good luck!
2007-01-05 09:17:09 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs. Harrington 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he dosen't want to be responsible he should not get to see the baby thats my opinion of course and it may sound harsh but thats the way it should be I would consider inviting some females to the shower if they are good people I have a good relationship with my babys daddys mom but I got lucky hes not a role model type at all and my son has only seen him once along long time ago actually he is not even aware of the fact my husband is not his real daddy good luck on the decision
2007-01-05 09:11:16 · answer #5 · answered by tasha l 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless the thought of having them absolutely turns your stomach, I would say to invite them. If your baby is going to have relationships with the family...don't burn the bridges now. If they are going to be occasional babysitters, etc - let them be involved. The baby shower is only about 2 hours of your life. If they dont feel like they should be there, or have bad feelings against you, then they wont come and its no sweat. If you are close with his mother, you could always have her drop it to the family that youre inviting them because you want them to feel involved, and not just fishing for gifts...and if they dont want to come you understand. Sometimes it easier just to suck it up for a couple hours rather than to ruin the relationships for life. Good Luck!!!
2007-01-05 09:20:33 · answer #6 · answered by Nylrak 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It honestly depends on your comfort level. Baby showers are special days for mothers and it should not be stressful.
Likewise, a babyshower should be special for the father too. You may consider inviting your child's father and his family to the babyshower because it's a nice gesture to begin positive communication between both sides of the family. More importantly, it can help you build a healthy rapport with your child's father which is important for your baby. Children need both parents.
2007-01-05 09:08:53 · answer #7 · answered by WORLD FAMOUS 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know a lot of people won't agree with me on this one, but your baby shower is not about your ex or his family. It's about YOU and your baby. Granted, your baby will be a part of his family as well, but if they want to shower you and your soon to be with gifts, they should do so seperately. I experienced this same situation when I was pregnant and had the "other family" invited. I'll regret it always.
2007-01-05 09:07:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the father and his family are going to be a part of the baby's life then I would invite them.
2007-01-05 09:08:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say don't invite them to the shower. Instead have someone in your family host a luncheon AFTER the baby is born...a celebration of baby!! Invite his family to THAT!! This way they get to meet the baby....and the focus is off you. If they want to bring gifts....fine. But you won't feel like you are asking them for gifts!!
I only say have someone else host it because YOU will be tired for a whle after the baby is born!!
Good luck and CONGRATULATIONS!!!
(Have you considered a diaper cake??)
2007-01-05 21:29:57 · answer #10 · answered by diapercakesbybecca 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋