I am confused. I fantasize about sex with women (including during mastrubation) , and have been turned on by straight pornography. Men can be atractive to me, but not sexually. I have absorbed alot of gay style though, even in manerisms and speech. My wardrobe is filled with tight and shiny clothing (pleather) and i have pierced nipples ;) ! "pop" music is on my stereo and seem to easily get female friends (almost exclusively female friends), but too easily become "one of the girls" A friend's mother even seriously said to her "oh you mean your gay friend" in reference to me. I know my friend in her heart does NOT think i am gay, But could her mother have women's intuition?? Having endured years of the apearantly "normal" abuse from the jocks and ditzy girls at my school about being gay made that worse. School aministration and my parents were involved in this and i still fear for my saftey. What can i do?
2007-01-05 08:54:17 · 13 answers · asked by Meteor Crater Boy 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
This reminds me of the old SNL skit with Dana Carvey (boy, does that date me or what?) called: "Lyle, the Effeminate Heterosexual."
I assume that the reason others assume you are gay is because you fit the cultural stereotype of a gay fellow: nelly mannerisms, shiny clothes, lots of gal pals. But, surprise! You're straight!
And that's a damn shame, really. Seems like you're getting all the abuse that's associated with being gay, but none of the perks.
Whatever, ignore the morons who give you a hard time and just be yourself. They'll probably never understand how much courage and fortitude are required to walk the path of nontraditional gender expression, so hats off to you.
2007-01-05 09:37:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Acting gay is nothing more than fitting certain stereotypes of what others think gay people act like. Certain clothes, piercings, and music tastes are nothing more than stereotypes and have nothing to do with sexual attraction. Gay is a definition of being sexually attracted to other men, and since you say you are not sexually attracted to men that means that you are not gay.
You should ignore as much as possible the abuse you are receiving, and when they do not get a reaction from you they will pick on someone else who reacts to them. If you continue to fear for your safety at school, it means the school administration is not doing enough. Transferring to another school could just mean the same things would happen at the other school, so your parents should contact the school board directly and say if something is not done to correct the abuse that the local media will be contacted.
2007-01-05 10:14:46 · answer #2 · answered by χριστοφορος ▽ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
for a long time i thought i might have been a lesbian because other people thought i was, and told me i was sometimes. but their opinions were nothing to do with my ever having expressed any interest in girls. it was only because i don't pull random men in clubs, wear loads of makeup and high heels or dumb myself down in the presence of the opposite sex. i felt confused too until i got a little bit older and realised that anything i exude outwardly has nothing to do with how i feel inwardly. nobody can tell you who you are. do what feels natural to you, and remember that the people who strive to pigeonhole you for whatever reasons are the ones that are insecure in themselves. they see people not conforming to any of the small amount of stereotypes that they use as their frames of reference for how the world should be and they feel uncomfortable. a straight man acting 'gay'?! a gay man acting 'straight'?! whats next?!!!! soon the sky will be the ground and the ground will be the sky!!
the way i see it, i'd prefer not fit into that narrow little window of what is 'normal'. i've found that the people i've met and loved the most, well i never would have met them if i'd tried so hard to fit into "the box".
2007-01-05 09:19:53 · answer #3 · answered by spiralling 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i may not be gay but i have a gay cousin and a Friend who's gay what i thank is maby your not gay but Bi ???? ever thought of that any ways you have friend right so who cares I've had a crap filled life and my friend stood by me even when people spread the roomer that in gay the point I'm trying to make is ( be who you are and not be in flounced by others if your gay then be gay I'm a punk rocker and my school is full of rap lovers I'm an atheist and people me for it I'm not letting them change me neater should you as for fearing for your safety i have some advice for that if a couple of them kick the living crap out of them one at a time have a rep for not being messed with i beat up a kid who was popular and the source of my problems and i wasn't messed with any more if its a lot of them then hang out where you can run fast if you surrounded hit the biggest one and run like hell that's all i have and that's from some one who grew up fighting you may not thank it bu you can wop any one it's not the size of the dog in the fight it's the size of the fight in the dog.
2007-01-05 09:11:32 · answer #4 · answered by cthulhu will raise 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can, ignore the bullies. If they don't get a reaction from you, then they will give up on you.
At the end of the day, you just be what makes you comfortable, and sodd everyone else.
If you want to look straight, then try a new wardrobe - dump the tight clothes and get something "normal".
2007-01-05 09:12:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This kind of happened to one of my best friends. He acted kind of girly in junior high and high school, but he's completely straight. It ended up me being gay, when everyone thought I was straight. And he is straight, and everyone thought he was gay. It's just stupid high school ****. Don't worry about it too much. Maybe you are gay, maybe you're not. You'll figure it out eventually. Don't let dumb-*** high schoolers make you worry about it.
2007-01-05 09:00:13 · answer #6 · answered by drummerzac1 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
YOU CAN BE ACTING LIKE A GAY, BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE GAY.
A MAN WHO IS GAY IS A MAN WHO HAD SLEEP WITH ANOTHER MAN OR WHO DRESSES LIKE A WOMAN.
TELL SOMEONE ABOUT THIS, CAUSE THIS CONFUSION CAN TURN YOU GAY IF YOU WANTED OR NOT. THE THOUGHT OF BEING GAY CAN BE SO POWERFUL THAT WILL BEGIN TO THINK THAT BECAUSE YOU ACT LIKE GAY, YOU ARE GAY. BUT BELEIVE ME YOU ARE NOT. YOUR ASPECT MUST NOT DETERMINE WHO YOU ARE!!!!1
2007-01-05 09:11:35 · answer #7 · answered by Gabriel Revelations 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's going to come out in the wash anyway, so be comfortable with whatever way you lean - just be safe, not sorry!
2007-01-05 08:59:02 · answer #8 · answered by Modern Major General 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell somewon and get them to stop picking on you gayness isnt bad like we actuly have a choice to be gay its not right
2007-01-05 08:58:11 · answer #9 · answered by tyler 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just amitted your bi.. you like both sex, nothing wrong with tha, you will always be titled as gay, no matter how you look at it... sorry
2007-01-05 08:58:40 · answer #10 · answered by TIKI 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋