I was dating a married man for 18 months. Three weeks ago he simply hung up on me.?

Question

I was dating this guy a doctor, so between his wife and work we had to squeeze in time. He told me I was his "true love." He would call me and say, "If I don't see you, I'll die." I fell for it, all of it. He told me he has to be with a woman who is "honest." I am a fiction writer, he knows I've tried to be open and tell him all that goes on in my life. Unfortunately, the fact that I'm attractive and friendly makes it worse. He won't speak to me. Not a word. Help!

Answer 1

forget about him and dont take him back if he calls you with an excuse****

Answer 2

Taking this into the work place where you both kept careful to keep it out of... would be a big mistake. Grown adult women in the work place are expected to keep their love life to themselves. Whether it was with the boss or the janitor. It was consensual, you were both adults, it isn't the business' problem that he told you he was single and you didn't know enough about him, even after sleeping with him for months, to figure out otherwise. Keeping it quiet won't hurt your career. Making it public very likely will. You were not raped, you were not forced into anything, In fact , you leaped into an affair with a man who told you he was engaged to be married just months before. So it seem unlikely you were looking for anything meaningful or permanent yourself and... how is this the company's problem anyway? Plus, you haven't met this "wife" and don't actually know that is true either. You've no more evidence that he's married than you did he was single. The affair is over. That's all you know. This is your lesson. Cross him off your list and carry on with your life. Sorry you had an affair with a cad. Not the company's problem.

Answer 3

hey, i was in the same boat, but i put a stop to it after 6 months. she said she wanted me and not him, i make her shiver i make her feel real love and everything else. well, she had plenty of times to end what she had and never did. so i took my losses and went on. the thing i dont get is that i know you love him, but why are you #2 when you should be #1? you dont go home with him, and he sees you when he can. i have a feeling that he knows what he did was very wrong and we both probably want to go kill these people that did this to us. but at the same time, we have to take some blame since we knew going in what the situation was. so if he doesnt want anything to do with you, then you know right there where his true feelings lie. funny how this is almost the exact same thing i am in. with the duration being the only thing. some people say what they need too, to win us over, and like a sucker, we fall hard over it. my "girl" said that she only has been with three guys, and basically pure, which turned into 13 guys, cheated on every b/f she had, and basically led a triple life. even though in my heart i still love her like you love this guy, we know that their actions are strong enough to let all that love fade away over the coming months, and they are the ones that need to look into the mirror everyday. not us!

Answer 4

Sorry - no help here. His wife obviously found out he was having an affair and has foolishly agreed to stay with him. He is on a short leash right now. You must be a fiction writer and living in a fantasy world if you fell for the old lines he was feeding you. Men have been telling their mistresses this for centuries. I could count on one hand the number of men I know who have actually left their wives for their fling. As my grandmother used to say - "why buy the cow when the milk is free." You've been used. Use your attractiveness on a single man the next time.

Answer 5

The man going behind his wife's back for some cheap sex on the side says he has to be with an "honest" woman? Read that sentence until the truth sinks in. Consider this a valuable lesson learned. Getting involved with someone who cheats is asking for a future of being the next one to be cheated ON.

Answer 6

his wife probably found out and gave him an ultimatum her or u, and he made his choice. he won't talk to u because he finally realized he wants his wife. and he is trying to send u a message to leave him alone. unfortunately in life there are some pretty hard lessons, with dire consequences, that do hurt us and cause our hearts to break, but what have u learned by all of this? as life is a teacher, and sometimes we have to go through bad things so we can mature and grow up. bet u won't ever go for a married man again.

Answer 7

You simply fell for his rubbish. He just wanted you for sex. You were not dating, you were a booty call. Either he got caught by his wife or he just became bored with you so he has moved on to someone else. You should find yourself lucky that he won't take your calls. Married men are a dead end. Forget about him and move one. Don't take his phone calls if he calls you in the future. He will never leave his wife.

Answer 8

Between his wife and not talking to you I thing you would understand the situation. You were used. Move and and find a man who is single. He said what you wanted to hear until he no longer wanted you. Never mess with a married man. It does no good for anyone.

Answer 9

My best suggestion will be for you to connect with someone else who can pleasantly distract you from thinking about him. You write fiction and am sure can tell the difference between fact and fiction.

It isn't easy but you'll have to start somewhere. If you'd like to share more of your thoughts, just IM/email me. Good luck :-)

Answer 10

You're full of yourself aren't you? I'm glad he realized that his wife means the world to him and figured this out before it turned into a divorce. GO AWAY & STAY AWAY FROM ALL MARRIED MEN! Are you that stupid? "I'm attractive and friendly..." I don't care if you think you're all sexy and all that, but you need to GROW UP and open up a Bible. Get some morals. This is just unbelievable. Another hoochie mama.

Answer 11

Sounds like a True life Fatal Attraction topic for your next book!