Any advice for a a newlywed couple living together for the first time?

Question

We move her and her stuff up tomorrow.

Answer 1

Don't take subtle changes to heart.She is going to change the place all around. mainly because she wants it to look like she lives there with you. Be ready for her to talk to you when your in the bathroom.It doesn't matter how many time you tell her not to she will do it anyway. Get 2 t.v's.Do not go to bed angry.Even if you have to agree to disagree.Women fester on issues. So we usual will blow things up so if you fall asleep knowing shes made be ready to wake up to a frozen tundra(NO LOVIN AT ALL).

PMS... becomes a whole new experience when you live together. but don't ever tell her she has PMS. Not until you guys have a few years under your belt. What you can do is expect to buy her pads,Expect sweatpants,expect outrageous amounts of food to be eaten.Expect an argument that starts with something as little as picking up your socks.

The one thing that i believe is the hardest for all men is money. I hope you guys have a plan for who pays what and who spends what.

In all things communication. You are going to experience communication like never before. It's going to take time to truly open up about everything, but that is you goal. To have a partner that has your back and knows you inside and out.

Lastly grow together,as you get older you both will find other interest and things you find appealing. So just support one another.
Even if you think it's foolish. Express your concern(without condemning) and get the information.
Remember it's you 2 against the world.

Answer 2

First of all, Congrats! It's such a wonderful time and a difficult time at the same time. I just got through my first year of marriage with my hubby and we had our fair share of good and bad times. I hate how a lot of newlywed people say their relationships are perfect because bottom line, NO ONE IS!! I think the best advice I could give you is that you really have to understand each other's expectations about house work, working, money etc, and make plans, for example with house work trade off the duties so that not just one person is doing all of the work, schedule time together so that the spark doesn't die.

You probably already know all of this stuff but I think every couple needs to realize that both people in the relationship are different and may have different expectations. Just when in doubt alway ask each other. And don't forget to always compliment, it's so nice hearing them from your spouse especially when the world has come down hard on your shoulders. Good luck!! =)

Answer 3

Yes. 1) Forgo the children for the first couple of years as they will rob you of your intimacy and your "honeymoon" period. In the first two years you will find that you seem to have many arguments over your personal differences, which is normal. Children only postpone this clash of your personalities which will explode in the future and hurt you much. It is better to do it when you can concentrate and think with a clear mind. 2) Learn to save about 20% of your income in a high-interest account such as "Ing" which pays 4.75%; the bank doesn't even offer .1%. 3) travel once per year to a new destination and bond, explore, and learn to appreciate the world as a whole. You will be a better marriage as a result of it. I recommend cruising (Noriegan, princes). 4) Live life INTENTIONALLY and don't let other people's
preferences limit you. Those who don't have a good marriage should not counsel those who do.
Mr. M is well traveled, has been married for 15 years, and has no children. My wife and I are the envy of many and will have children soon enough. I hope that this advice enhances your life.
Sincerely,
Mr. M. on "newlywed."

Answer 4

Well I am a newly wed too!! Just got married in july 21. 06

my advice is TRAIN EACH OTHER

study what bothers her and make sure she does the same!
Communicate!
and try to not get too loose around each other, Example give each other personal space such as toilet time, shower time(sometimes), and meditation time.
Also so things wont be too weird in some areas try to set up your house to how you lived before allow her to have some feminem space where she can dry her hair and put on her make-up, and she should allow you to do the same.
Remember being married is different. EVERYTHING is 50/50 desicions should NEVER be made without the others approval...
One thing I struggled with, is my new hubby's friend attatchment issue, it was never as bad as it was after we married,
From the first week we moved in I would come home from work after my hubby only to find him and his best friends from childhood sitting in the living room hanging out, almost everyday if not everyday!! We had NO privacy I lived and tryed to fix that problem the first 3 months of marriage! It was not easy but we came to a happy agreement and now the problem is solved.
This is all new but with time and patience things will get easier and newly-wed issues will be solved all you need is..
Communication
LOVE
Understanding Attitude
when you cant understand why she is yelling try to take a step back and listen to her, and try to put yourself in her shoes and see things through her eyes... she should do the same!!
Good Luck!! Congrats!! and HAVE FUN WITH THIS!!!

BE FAITHFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 5

1. Give yourselves the first year to get to know eachother's preferences and another year to smooth out all the rough edges;
2. Embrace your differences and admire eachother for being the individuals you are, avoid becoming a clone of eachother as you will bore eachother and those who know you;
3. Each of you make a list, divided into 3 parts: chores you like to do (gardening/grocery shopping?), chores you don't like or dislike doing (taking out the garbage/doing laundry?) and chores you hate doing (cleaning the toilet/balancing checkbook?). Try and settle who does what according to your lists.
4. Make a personal space for each of you, even if you live in a small home, even if it is just a chair in a corner or a desk, it is important each of you have someplace that is yours alone.
5. Avoid money fights from the start. Write down your total income and your total regular monthly expenses. This puts it all in black and white and each of you know exactly where you stand each month. Try to avoid making one person the banker and one person the begger. After expenses, put away at least 10% of what remains, even if it is only $10 a month. Put anything else that is left over into a fund for things you can do together, or save up for something you both would like, like a house.
6. During those first volitile years, avoid bringing dislikes into the arena. If she hates potatos and action films, leave them out. If he hates frilly pillows and peach daquiris, leave them out. Make some sacrifices in the beginning and you will reap the benefit of your efforts for the rest of your marriage.

Remember one thing if nothing else: You are eachother's biggest fans, best cheerleaders, you are eachother's soft and safe place in the world. You would protect eachother from anyone else who tried to hurt eachother so don't hurt eachother yourselves. Being "right" is never worth what it costs you.

Finally, understand that the girl you married is not the woman you will spend the rest of your life with, she will change and you will change. Change is good. Diversity is wonderful and when two people think differently, they bring twice as much to the relationship.

Good luck!!

Answer 6

It will probably be difficult adjusting to a new living situation even though you love each other. Make sure you communicate your feelings all the time. It helps to resolve issues if you both know how the other is feeling. Never call her out of her name. When you call a person out of their name then you make the arguement about them when it is really about something else. Then the person always remembers that you called them a son of a so and so.

Answer 7

Heck yeah..there are a lot of things-The whole sex thing I wish someone had talked to me about. The only advice I can give is that most of your arguments will be centered around just two issues: Sex and money...either you will argue about lack of sex or someone wanting it to much. The same thing with money lack of or someone is spending to much. Trust me if you can some how get those two issues straightened out before you go to the altar you will avoid some problems. I would definitely (if your religion allows) go to a pre-marriage counselor.

Answer 8

The first year is the Hardest.....Pretty much Hell! Stay true to each other and learn how to communicate.....Marriage is harder than a Job. Raising kids is even easier.....But being married has it's beautiful moments more than bad.....It's just that you have two people learning how to live with each other......the rough edges have to be smoothed out. You will make it. Stay focused on her and less on yourself......and maybe she can learn to focus on you and less on herself as well. Most fights are because of selfishness.

Answer 9

Yes, realize that nothing in life is what it seems unless it is voiced and awareness is about. Give her all the room she needs. You won't need much and you can claim spots after. Remember please to constantly work at love. Never assume that she is happy or satisfied, make sure she is; and please for gods sake as her to do the same for you.

Other than that: Happy night time in bed with TV or Book snuggling. Hold hands each night, k.

Enjoy

Answer 10

I would advise that each of you have one space in the house that is yours. Even if you don't have enough space for you each to have a room, it would help if each of you had a desk or a corner that was only yours and the other person respected and stayed away from.