My husband has been having an affair for 6-7 months now. I just found out. He is still seeing her and also has planned a trip to hawaii with her (it does not realize I know this piece of info). I will be moving out of our house while he is gone. Do I have legal right to take what is in the house and what is in our bank accounts?
2007-01-05 04:24:39 · 23 answers · asked by bo2 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We live in california
2007-01-05 04:44:02 · update #1
take it all let him take you to court....
2007-01-05 04:27:27 · answer #1 · answered by troble # one? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First, you must consult (cost: about $75) a divorce attorney even if you get good advice here. If you make a false move such as cleaning out the account, you will be held to answer. Of course you can't take what is in the house and bank account. The guy doesn't have a clue and he will argue that you knew of the affair and planned to steal it all. This will bolster his claim that you are the problem and what was he to do. Suffer without a shoulder to cry on? So, get an attorney and play by the rules.
2007-01-05 12:46:24 · answer #2 · answered by ALWAYS GOTTA KNOW 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to a lawyer first----If you take the money in anticipation of divorce, you'll probably have to pay him back 50%. However, I do think it'd be great for you to empty that account while he's gone, put it into one in your own name so that when he gets there he has no money!!! Just save half in case you end up owing it to him. The bills still have to paid while you are in the process of divorce, so you could use his part for his portion of the rent and stuff-----I'm just really thinking out loud now......
The same would be true of the property I'd think. Call an attorney and then let us know, this is a very good question, b/c CA is so different from other states. Good luck and I'm sorry this happened to you.
2007-01-05 12:53:40 · answer #3 · answered by kathylouisehall 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless there was some arrangement made in the beginning of the marriage then I believe you are entitled to half of what is in the bank account. As far as the belongings go, that is iffy. I am one of the people that believes prenup or not, if there are no kids involved then each party should leave the relationship with what they brought into it. No one should have to give up what is theres because a relationship went down the tubes. Take whats "yours" and move on.
2007-01-05 12:29:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went back to the home I left and removed everything I wanted while my, then husband, was at work.
Although he threatened, he was unable to do anything about the belongings.
He did stop paying on our home and bills so I was left in trouble financial straights!
The advice given before me I agree with:
Sell anything you don't want and take all the money and move it into a family/friend's account (set up a special joint account in both names will protect form Hubby trying to get it).
If you want the home, change the locks and make a friendly visit (maybe with cookies?) to your local Police station to inform them of the possibility of domestic trouble in the near future. Be honest with them.
Is the other woman married? I would make a call to her husband (if she has one) and call her boss to let him know how trustworthy his employee is. Yes it's mean and nasty but your whole life will be changing so completely and possibly for the worst. What did she get out of it? Hawaii! Does she deserve it?
2007-01-05 13:00:16 · answer #5 · answered by maj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if the bank account is in both of your names, you can take whatever you want out of it as far as I know. As far as the house and what is in it, I think that is a little stickier of a situation. You can always take it and than fight about it in divorce court litigation. You shouldn't have much of a problem especially if you can prove infidelity, if I am not mistaken you could even claim that you are "accustomed" to a certain lifestyle and since he cheated on you, you can court order him to pay you money every month to help mantain that lifestyle, it's called alimony. You could also lay claim to everything else...he's really put himself in a hole. Good luck to you and please don't let anger or hatred harden your heart. It will prevent you from loving in the future and than your soon to be X will truly have won over you no matter how much money or posessions you get out of the divorce.
2007-01-05 12:37:00 · answer #6 · answered by J-Dub 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many answers would depend on which state you are in. I don't know if you leaving the house will be considered abandonment or not, but I do know that you can go in and get the money and I would open an account somewhere else and put it in your name only, savings/checking, it is your money too. I would also change the locks on the doors and anything that has locks, keep everything you want and have everything you do not want put in storage and billed to his new girlfriend, with his name on there too.
2007-01-05 12:43:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are YOU moving out of the house when HE is the one breaking your marriage contract? After the divorce is filed, you may not tamper with the bank accounts. That is why people getting a divorce clean out the bank accounts before they file for divorce. If you want the house and furniture, you should request the use of it in your temporary order when you file for divorce. Please see an attorney.
2007-01-05 12:30:07 · answer #8 · answered by cathy e 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This depends on so many things, what state you live in, the length of your marriage, who brings income into your marriage, what you each brought with you into the marriage. I was in the same boat (caught mine cheating after ten years!) and I didn't get all that I should have (didn't want to fuss with lawyer fees), but getting it all over with and getting on with my life was the best revenge!!! It took a little while, but I am SOOOO much better off now and married a wonderful man about 4 years ago. We have a fabulous life together and all my EX has is DRAMA!!! :)
2007-01-05 12:29:40 · answer #9 · answered by searching_please 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As of right now yall are still married right? Then it is yalls money, I would drain the accounts and put it all into a family members account to hold until the divorce is over. Take all the **** you don't "have" to keep Sell it and put the money into the account. Deplete anything of value, then divorce his *** with nothing to fight over!
2007-01-05 12:29:05 · answer #10 · answered by B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you moving out, take all his **** while he is gone and put it on her lawn. Then he can come back and find it. Also get new locks. If he owns the house, then just take all the crap you want and get it all out while he is away. I wouldnt let him know you know he is going away or he may cancel the trip. Then have him take you to court for all the stuff.
2007-01-05 12:28:34 · answer #11 · answered by dnelak 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋