Been married 15 years, about 3 years ago wife started e-mailing and calling old boyfriend from high school. The part is she has not always been telling the truth about how much or how often she's spending time?
2007-01-05 04:01:59 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She's probably just reliving her youth a little and is aware that she may be over-indulging herself...hence the little white lies about how much time she's spending on this.
Not all of us can stand growing up and growing old and we feel as if our lives have been hi-jacked. Sometimes we can dwell on the what if's too much, sometimes it's just nice to know that we're still desirable. Try and find out what things make her eyes sparkle like a teenagers again and get on and do these together... I honestly think that if this guy was a real threat she'd be long gone by now
2007-01-05 04:07:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't jump to conclusions unless you have real proof of anything. The worst thing you can do is accuse and not have any thing to back up what you think might be going on. Confronting the issue is always difficult but it is something you must do. Does she know that you know the communication she's been having with the old boyfriend? Most people would say there is more to it then just a friendly email or call, but you have to find out the truth for yourself, otherwise you will make yourself miserable. If she is hiding something then it needs to be dealt with. 15 yrs of marriage is a long time to just be wasted so don't just wonder. Find facts and then confront the issue.
2007-01-05 12:13:06 · answer #2 · answered by alymarie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's possible. Maybe she's hiding how often she corresponds with him, because you show signs of anxiety or anger or jealousy. If it really bothers you this much, then she should respect your wishes and drop this new friendship. But, just remember, if you should happen to stumble upon your old sweet heart, you should not be friends with her. Even if you feel and know it is only friendship between you. You will have to oblige and stick to the same rules you set out for you wife. Turn about is fair play, so they say.
2007-01-05 12:08:45 · answer #3 · answered by Vida 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! NO! NO! It does not work and I know this firsthand! I think your wife needs a reality check. She is married to you not him and should not be spending time with him. For what? This is cause for disaster. She needs to STOP talking with him. Why did she start contacting him to begin with? That is very odd! I would tell her you need to both seek marriage counseling, because something is wrong if she wants to keep contacting her ex when she is married to you. you also mentioned she has not been truthful about how much time she talks/spends with him, that is awful and unacceptable! I wish you all the best.
2007-01-05 12:06:17 · answer #4 · answered by MG 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no harm in communicating with a high school crush. And really, that is all they are in high school, nothing more than a crush. She is feeling nostalgic, that's all. Instead of getting defensive and jealous, try to spend more time with her and get involved more in her life. Tell her, if he is such a great guy, invite him and his significant other over for dinner or drinks. You never know, this could lead to a great new friendship.
2007-01-05 12:06:42 · answer #5 · answered by Terry M 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You as a man should know the answer already...once a man is done with a relationship, he's done. The only reason that he would resurface was if there was still an attraction or the smallest amount of hope that something else could come from the contact.
2007-01-05 12:04:56 · answer #6 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wants him, maybe not for what he is but for what she remembers of what once was. Don't blame it all on her and try to think of what YOU are doing wrong. What could she possibly be looking for that she's not getting at home? And I'm thinking attention, details, and other emotional needs more than physical. 15 years is a long time, stop taking your wife for granted and gain her heart back.
2007-01-05 12:10:19 · answer #7 · answered by guicho79 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well depending on the person I would say, but you have already said that she is not being completely honest with you, so maybe she is cheating. Even if they were being just friend's just how long would it take for that old flame to spark back up...If there was nothing to it then she would only have contact with him when you were there also... which is the only time that she should be talking with him or seeing him.. sorry..but I fell you know yourself the answer to your question
2007-01-05 12:09:51 · answer #8 · answered by browneyedonna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, this is a real double-edged sword, because yes, me and my ex husband are best friends. We tried to make it work out, it didn't, and we stayed best friends. And we're in contact often and it doesn't bother my current man.
But she's talking to an old flame from high school? hmm.... I'd nip that in the bud.
2007-01-05 12:08:21 · answer #9 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My opinion and how I feel is that if this were nothing she would be open with you, if you're allowing her to be and she would not mind if you knew everything. If she is being hush, hush on this you may need to confront her with some questions to get to the bottom of it all. I know with my husband, he is all the man I need, but I do have male friends, but he knows if and when I talk with them and what the conversation is about, because I feel comfortable letting him know and like I said, he is all I need.
2007-01-05 12:19:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋