My bf has just started work at a new job and he is constantly talking about this man there. He is gay by the way. He takes my bf out for breakfast after they finish the night shift and pays for everything. He is always saying how this man flirts with him. I have no problem with gay men at all, that's who they are. But if this was a woman taking him out and flirting I'd be really annoyed! Just cos it's a man does it make it any better? My boyfriend always fancies women with strong jaws too, he actually fancied that Nadia the transexual off big brother. I showed him a pic of her before he knew she was a he and he said she was nice!!! lol, I'm getting a bit worried now. I know it does sound a bit funny but what do you all think?
2007-01-05 04:00:40 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Aww no, sorry, his friend is gay.
2007-01-05 04:28:21 · update #1
It's not just Nadia though, whenever I look through magazines and there is a transexual I ask him do you find them attractive, he does it to me with other guys too. He will always say that he finds a transexual attractive. Maybe it is because they look like women but I think they will always look masculine no matter what. He always finds masculine women attractive too. Does that mean he his bi sexual and kind of likes a certain look no matter what sex the person is?
2007-01-05 04:33:49 · update #2
Paxon he also appreciates male photos. He always says how disappointed he is that Russel Crowe no longer looks how he did on Gladiator. He did say while we were watching a film with Jason Statham in how attractive he was. Actually as I am recalling these things I'm getting more worried. Perhaps he appreciates peoples beauty no matter what sex but perhaps he is bi sexual. I have asked him before and he laughed at me telling me not to be silly.
2007-01-05 04:51:36 · update #3
He may be one paxon, but how is it my fault?? I can't make someone gay and if he didn't like me then he doesn't have to be with someone he doesn't like. I haven't got him chained up with a gun to his head. Nobody HAS to be with anybody.
2007-01-05 07:59:10 · update #4
Don't worry unless you KNOW that your boyfriend actually fancies his colleague.
Even if he likes the way some men look, that doesn't make him gay. A lot of straight women would admit to feeling something just a little bit sexual towards other gorgeous women... it's just they prefer men much more.
If you think he might be a bit bi, that's no reason to end the relationship unless you are sure that you can't trust him to be faithful. Even if he is bi (and there isn't much evidence for that) it wouldn't mean that he HAS to be with other men. He's obviously chosen to be with you.
When you start a new job it can be a bit lonely. Your boyfriend will be really grateful for whatever company he can get. You could jokingly warn him not to lead the gay guy on though...
Some of the answers on here are dumb. There's no way that you've made him gay. For a start that is actually impossible.
My advice is, just don't worry, if your boyfriend has chosen to be in a relationship with you then he's not gay.
Good luck.
2007-01-05 12:32:04 · answer #1 · answered by psychedelic_fighter 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does your bf have a glint in his eye, a long distance look on his face...when he talks about the gay guy?
You and your bf need to be able to trust one another, if your relationship is to work. Have you spoken to him about how you feel? Have you let him know that you're almost jealous of this other guy? Have you considered that they are just having banter and that your bf is utterly devoted to you?
As for the Nadia pic business, Get real! She looks like the woman she's been made into. Not the most stunning but certainly not the most heinous either.
Perhaps the problem is yours?
2007-01-05 04:20:13 · answer #2 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is NOT gay. Besides when he saw the pic he though it was a woman. You would be worried if he starts "appreciating" mens photo.
As for that gay guy, tell your bf to set boundaries. By going out and having breakfast daily, the gay guy might think your bf likes him. Gay people easily fall inlove with their "friends". Your bf should insist to pay for his meals and occassionally not go out with him. In this way, the gay guy would get the picture that your bf is not interested with him or is he??
2007-01-05 04:34:34 · answer #3 · answered by PAXson 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a conversation with him. Many masculine gays will deny that they are gay solely by the fact that they "do not act" gay. Befriending another gay man is often the first step in them accepting who they are.
I am not saying that this is happening in your case but it is possible and if it is, it will be better for both of you to identify it now.
Best thing is to sit down with him and have a good discussion. Remember communication is talking AND listening.
Good Luck!
2007-01-05 04:15:28 · answer #4 · answered by Tegarst 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is often the case that gay men tend to be flirtatious with their friends, even those toward whom there is no serious romantic interest.
And even if your husband appreciates the attention, or has some curiosity about having sex with a man, does that necessarily mean your relationship is in jeopardy?
2007-01-05 04:07:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
He should be upfront with the guy; the guy may just be being nice but you should talk to your bf about your concerns. My gf goes to lunch with girls everyday but they are just work friends. Honesty is the best policy. Although I had an ex that was not so honest and was a cheater so just keep your eyes open and communicate.
2007-01-05 04:09:13 · answer #6 · answered by azgraywolf143 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-01 21:05:53 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that if you're having these kind of doubts about your bf, you should get out of the relationship. Of course, you could have the profound conversation with him that others are suggesting, but my guess is that even if he completely denies any gay tendencies, you're still going to have doubts. I know that I would not want to be in a relationship with someone who is behaving as your bf is behaving. If you want a satisfying heterosexual relationship, you have to have full confidence that your partner wants one also.
2007-01-05 04:26:12 · answer #8 · answered by Marcella S 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I guess you'll soon have to put up with him inviting the guy over to your place from then on you will see the gay side of him really exposed and the who knows some Groupie thing.
2007-01-05 04:06:44 · answer #9 · answered by Ralf D 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I find it unusual that you don't seem to mind having a gay boyfriend.(Maybe I misunderstood. Did you say your boyfriend was gay or just his friend at work? Apologies if I did misunderstand)
2007-01-05 04:03:43 · answer #10 · answered by Birdman 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋