Can you convince yourself that something doesn't matter to you?

Answer 1

You can try,but if your heart is involved,it matters......

Answer 2

Oh, indeed you can, and there are quite a few ways to do it.

One, you can use auto-suggestion. It's not that complicated really. Sometimes, simply telling yourself over and over that "So-and-so doesn't matter to me" can convince your psyche. Remember the Little Engine That Could? He's the little train that kept telling himself "I think I can, I think I can" over and over like a mantra. Try that and before you know it, you'll start thinking it automatically.

Another is the behavioral approach. If you're familiar with association, pairing, or conditioning, you'll know what I mean. Every time so-and-so pops into your world view, simply say, "That doesn't matter" or make it mean nothing by simply ignoring it. At the start, you can even go as far as to reward yourself every time you successfully catch yourself to say that "So-and-so doesn't matter". The reward will make the experience a pleasant one for you, and soon, it will become automatic.

A third (still behavioral) approach is taking up some behavior or, in your case, a belief that is incompatible with whatever it is that you are trying to convince yourself doesn't matter. For instance, you could believe that the opposite of that thing matters. Simple example: you want to convince yourself that the negative things in life don't matter to you. So, believe that only the positive things matter.

Lastly, there is the more psychoanalytic attack. Ask yourself why it matters to you--if it fulfills some desire or sort of acts as a defense mechanism or you simply can't let go of it. Whatever it is, dig deep inside yourself and then when you find out what role this thing plays in your life. Actively decide that the role no longer matters then the thing won't matter. Or, let something else play the role of this thing that no longer matters, and you're done. Of the four, this takes the most soul-searching, but it may also be the most permanent.

There may be several other ways, but these are probably the simplest. Remember though that these won't work if somewhere inside you, you really do believe it, whatever it is, matters to you and has a good reason for mattering.

Answer 3

I my opinion, No, but then again that is just my opinion. Only you can decide the true answer to this question. As for my self, the harder I try to make something not important the more important it becomes. i.e., I smoke, the more I try to quit, the more I end up smoking. So, in short if you don't dwell on the situation, maybe, just maybe, oneday, it will no-longer matter to you.

Answer 4

it's not the easiest thing to do, i'll be the first to admit. when people i care about dismiss or ignore me, that's a little hard to take and may be easy to dismiss once in a while, but when it happens regularly you start to wonder what is is about you that is so easily discarded. if it's someone i don't really know, i really don't care what they think--there are too many people in the world and all of those opinions would make my head explode.

i also cannot dismiss the suffering of others. i may not know them and they may be on a different continent, but i still feel for them and i feel if i dismiss that than i am losing part of my humanity.

Answer 5

Mind over matter! I had convinced myself that my husbands cheating and genuine lack of caring for me didnt matter. I guess it is a coping mechanism.

Answer 6

If you know yourself, if you are in possession of your own power- you can simply decide to let it go, and achieve the same result.

If you are trying to talk yourself into it without the tools or power, you probably can't.

Answer 7

It can be done, infact I've already done just that. There were quite a few things which really mattered to me. But now, I just don't give a squat about them. So, like I said before, it can be done.

Answer 8

Yes, you surely can. I know I've done it before on occasion...

*edit: It gets harder and harder for me to do that these days, because when certain things matter to me and they don't matter to anyone else, I feel alone and saddened by that. There are so many things that matter to me that are dismissed by everyone else, and I don't know what to do about that. My husband does that to me a lot, dismisses things that matter to me.....

Answer 9

I cannot hit the "convince" button effectively on a gut feeling. "Delude" button will work short term, but "convince" is disabled against core values.

Answer 10

Yes you can.you could tell yourself f... the world nobody gives a f... about me anyways that works for me.

Answer 11

doubtful.. i can convince myself to hate something, but the fact that i am actively hating it is proof that it matters