Question about clinginess and temper tantrums in a 9 month old.?

Question

I have an almost 9 month old son who has hit a new level of being clingy and throwing temper tantrums. He's too young to discipline and every time I try to sit him down, he grabs ahold of me and won't let go, screaming. Also, if I do something he doesn't like, he'll throw himself all rigid on the floor screaming till he's red in the face. He won't go to anyone else, including his father (which is causing HUGE problems because his dad already doesn't want me being a stay-at-home mom because my husband thinks it'll make him a "mama's boy")...Does anyone have suggestions about how to stop temper tantrums in a child this young? Basically, I snap my fingers or clap my hands and tell him no in a strong voice. It does no good -- usually makes him cry harder. Also any suggestions on the clinginess thing. It doesn't bother me too much, but my husband and the grandparents are doing nuts not getting to hold my little boy! Thanks!

Answer 1

A nine month old is too young to really understand discipline, so all you can do is stay calm, tell him 'no' firmly but without yelling and then distract him with a toy, a song, or anything you know he likes. The one thing about 9 month old babies is that they are still pretty distractable, but you want to work fast because once he is in 'tantrum mode' it's too late. As soon as you say 'no' go right in to your distraction! My 17 month has had her share of meltdowns and distraction seems to work out best if I stay calm and don't get upset too (i know that is hard, sometimes!)
At any rate, he will grow out of this phase (this too shall pass!!)
Good luck!

Answer 2

no child is too young for boundaries, in fact all children need boundaries in order to feel that they are loved and secure. Without boundaries they misbehave, initailly it is attention but then it escalates into power. I'm guessing your child is into power and wants to own you. You cannot defeat a power hungry child you must walk away from tantrums(once he is not in danger of harm)it is hard to have a tantrum in an empty room, who would you be having a tantrum for???just remain calm and leave announce you are going to the bathroom he will probaly follow you. when all has quietened down and say 'isn't in nice in her now' and carry on with what you were doing. All behaviour has a purpose and this child has you full and undivided attention when like this, and there is no such thing as bad attention. Giving him attention is rewarding the tantrum. This is not concious bahaviour this is pure emotion and contains no morality (after all he is a child). But he still has a working brain that can work things out. He is also competeing with Dad for your attention/love as he probaly has no siblings to deal with yet. a good book would be 'children the challenge' by Rudolph Dreikers.As he speaks about logical consequences of misbehaviour and setting agreed boundaries rather than disipline and punishments which often cause harm.to a childs sef esteem.

P.S.Loud Noises are supposed to panic you into coming out of the room, and they are also proof thet he is still ok.

Answer 3

Sounds like to me he is just going through a phase. I don't think it will last too long. All three of mine have went through and they survived as well as I did. As far as the tantrums go. I wouldn't do anything except to tell her that when she was done showing her anger to let me know. Each time the temper tantrums would get shorter and shorter until eventually she realized they were doing no good. The more of a fuss you make over it , the more the child realizes he or she is getting their way. It is tough at first but it gets easier to ignore them. I wouldn't worry too much, it is perfectly normal for a child that age. The tantrums and clinginess will both go away.

Answer 4

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Question about clinginess and temper tantrums in a 9 month old.?
I have an almost 9 month old son who has hit a new level of being clingy and throwing temper tantrums. He's too young to discipline and every time I try to sit him down, he grabs ahold of me and won't let go, screaming. Also, if I do something he doesn't like, he'll throw himself...

Answer 5

9 Month Old Tantrums

Answer 6

He is not too young to "discipline" Discipline means training, not necessarily punishment. If I were you, when he has a tantrum I would put him in his crib and leave the room till he's done, no matter how long it takes. This is actually the easiest time to curb tantrums because you CAN just do that, when they can't climb out of their crib or leave their own room yet. You are training for the future, not just curbing the present problem. As far as the snapping or loud voice, remember that the goal is to STOP the crying, so don't do things that will make the crying worse.

Answer 7

i think that nine months old a good time to start teaching the word no. i started telling my daughter no at the age of no and now that she's 11 months she gets the word no. when she was nine months and she was misbehaving i did tell her no and if she did not listen i would move her to something else and if she went back i would smack her hand and say no again. i think that you should ignore the temper tantrums and show him that you are the mom and what you says goes. so be strong and you have to get him and his father to spend time together so work on that too. Good Luck

Answer 8

It's normal for this age, they have separation anxiety. Play peek-a-boo with him. He needs to get used to you being gone. You'll have to use an extreem version, like hide under a blanket and then pop out and surprise him, try to make him laugh. Keep playing as often as you can staying longer and longer under the blanket. Then move to hiding around the corner and popping out at him. If you make you leaving a game and then stretch the time you are gone longer and longer hopefully he will get used to you being gone easier. Also, when you do leave, don't make a big deal of it. Just kiss him and say Mommy will be right back and leave. Have whoever watches him get him distracted in something else just before you go. Hope it helps!

Answer 9

Its really too soon to expect him to listen to "no". Maybe he's clingy because he feels insecure and needs some snuggle time. I know its hard when you are busy but if you just take a break and go lay down and snuggle or play together it might help. And as for him becoming a "mamas boy" if you stay-at-home, thats nonsense. It will only make him feel more secure and strengthen your bond. i mean he's only 9 months, he needs his mama and he's too young to discipline.

Answer 10

Let your child go rigid and get red it won't hurt him. Than when he tries to cling you need to still set him down. I hate to say this, but it sounds to me like he is a "mama's baby". It sounds like you hold or carry him all the time. And if he cries harder let him. Eventually if you don't give in to the tantrums, he'll realize they are not getting him anywhere. Let daddy deal with him when he's having a tantrum, sometimes a males deeper voice inflections is all it takes.