Does p%rn give us unrealistic expectations? Or is it good for us?

Question

Maybe it makes us feel bad about ourselves (we can never be THAT attractive), or worse, maybe it makes us look for super-attractive partners.

Answer 1

In a way, I can say yes- I see where you're going. And I do think that it is fueling our society in subconscious ways, so that we often have wacked-out standards of beauty, including women getting breast implants and all that. Straight women, I think, are the ones who suffer the most- there is almost no porn that reflects the average woman, and a lot of them, knowing their boyfriends/husbands like porn, usually misinterpret that desire for salacious material to be a preference for a porn star look, and feel bad that they don't 'measure up'. Not to say that men (and women) aren't turned on by porn star beauty, but I just have a feeling that many men's desires range for more natural-looking women, if they were given the option.

On the other hand, I can tell you that when I watch porn, I'm honestly not thinking things like that. For the time when I'm watching it, I'm definitely not a big bucket of self-loathing, because I'm not comparing myself to them; I'm using them to fill a specific need. I really don't like 'super attractive' people in porn, anyways; I like to seek out stuff that features people I could imagine seeing on the street one day- for straight porn, average guys and girls next door, amateur stuff from real people. I also notice that good lesbian porn, the real stuff, like "The Crash Pad" or "Hard Love" and stuff from from fatalemedia.com- is often very great about having real-looking women; having a bigger body isn't a bad thing, and I, who thought I wouldn't enjoy it, found that it actually mattered very little to me; they were still attractive, and I still got and get very into the sex when normal-looking people are doing it.

I think it's far worse that porn gives us a different type of unrealistic expectations- about sex. The way it's portrayed is often not real to true experiences at all, and people watching it take that to be the way things are. I see nothing wrong with rough sex, BDSM, or a little roleplaying, but I think many times the misogyny of straight porn is interpreted as or is real life attitudes (b*tches, whores, sluts, all used in a derogatory way). Women's pleasure is rarely the focus, the depiction of real, genuine foreplay is rare, and things like rape and gangbangs, while absolutely fine for fantasies, are sort of given an okay stamp in porn. It's that kind of porn that tends to warp our brains a little, I think. I like to seek out well-made porn that educates, teaches, and titillates- stuff from Carol Queen and Shar Redenour, for instance, which I think manages to keep everything brilliantly realistic while still attractive and still hot.

So I guess I can say that porn does, indeed, give some people unrealistic expectations. But most of us know it for what it is, and don't get their self-esteem beaten down when they watch it. But you've got to remember, too, that there are a lot of people who, never having watched porn, are still going to 'look for super-attractive partners' in life. It's not porn's obsession on physical beauty that influences our society's beauty standards, it's our beauty standards that have made porn depict only certain body types and looks. In my opinion, at least.

Hope that made sense, I know I was rambling a bit.

Answer 2

Porn doesn't make me feel bad, in fact it makes me happy to look to it.

There is such a variety in porn especially the stuff on the net that a lot of it is now more personal pictures and thus more realistic.

On the matter of super attractive partners, most models in the media are often unrealistic and thus give unrealistic expectations to folk either in what they should be looking for in a partner or how they look themselves. Look at the ever increasing numbers of adolesent lasses with eating disorders.

Answer 3

I think it does leave unrealistic expectations, especially for gay men whos first encounters to gay sex may be through porn. When a video is 90 minutes long with the same 3 or 4 guys jackhammering away, it sets an unrealistic tone that gay sex may actually be like that, especially for younger men.

Its something my partner has struggled with, as sex is rarely as couth and practiced as it is in videos. It takes years of practice to make sex go as smoothly and as satisfyingly as videos tend to make the viewers believe.

Answer 4

Expectations? Of what kind?

I have an actractive partner who thinks that I am attractive.

I don't know if p%rn is good or bad, I believe that anything in high-dosage is not healty, however.

Answer 5

Why would it be all bad.?Anyway,sometimes it is like boosting your PC.If you are no really feeling in the mood,it can help you.
But it is no replacement for real sex.
A MINDBLOWJOB MAYBE?
EVER HEARD OF SELF ESTEEM?
IF YOU LACK THAT:BETTER NOT GET YOUR *** IN THE STREETS TOO,OR WATCH ANY MOVIE.
LOOKING FOR ATTRACTIVE PARTNERS
TO ME SOMEONE IS ATTRACTIVE ON THE INSIDE.
AND BESIDES THAT:NOT INTO BEAUTIFUL DUDES AT ALL.
ROB.XXX

Answer 6

I think so. I prefer amateur porn with realistic men in it. Not some hot glistening rock hard man out by the pool surrounded by palm trees.

Answer 7

Come on!I'm not much into porn and I've met my fair share of attractive people.Don't get addicted to that crap

Answer 8

in some cases it can,an ego trip from owning a technological gadget for example can give the owner a sense of being superior,when in reality they are not

Answer 9

I don't know. I don't like porn for lots of reasons. Mainly because I don't want those people to have my money.

Answer 10

I HAVE A SUPER ATTRACTIVE PARTNER SO I WILL LEAVE THE INTERNET P0RN TO YOU AND YOUR HAND