I have been married to my husband 8 years,He is good in everything except,he is never intimate to me?

Question

I have been married to my husband 8 years, He is good in everything except,he is never intimate to me and he is not interested in sex ... at all.
It has become gradually worse , I feel that I have tried everything to make things better. He knows that it is a problem and we have talked and I have cried about it for years. I told him many ways,that we will go for Counseling .but he is not intrested in doing so.I Love him so much and want him to change.I know it's not good for us to go like this for years and years.I can't disscuss this to any friends or anyone for help.So i thought of posting this question here and make my husband read the posts,so that it will be like a sort of counseling to us.

Answer 1

I am male and have the same problem in reverse email me??

Answer 2

You are not alone with this kind of problem; it happens to many other couples, but the wise ones normally seek counselling which sometimes can resolve the problem. If your husband is refusing this option, could it be that he has something to hide from you? He need not be afraid, provided the right type of counsellors are chosen. The problem can be physical, psychological, medical or whatever, and the only way to find out and remedy it is thru counselling. If he is still obstinate about it, then you may have to consider your own individual options which may not be to his liking. By the way, has your marriage produced any issues? Keep pressing, until he yields. Marriage, after all, is first and foremost about intimacy and sex. Without that, it basically ceases to exist.

Answer 3

Sharing in a physical coupling is part of any healthy and complete marriage. The question is difficult since we have no information concerning reasons given for HIS lack of sexual interest however let me risk some advice. Nail down the reasons for not having sex from his point of view and determine a remedy for the situation or you may have to consider ending the marriage since all you really have now is a roomy sharing in the expense of a home if sex is as important as indicated by your question.
Many people live in sexless relationships so you are not alone but consider that a marriage should be fulfilling to both parties and if your spouse doesn't want to work with you in the matter perhaps he doesn't feel like he's in a marriage. You may also consider he could be giving his attentions outside of the home. It is unpleasant to think about if you love him but it is a possibility.

Answer 4

A man lacking an interest in sex is very unusual. There may be several contributing factors such as depression? Is he under medication? Impotency,(he is too ashamed to tell you)? Is he attracted to you? Perhaps you let yourself become very overweight? Men do need an attraction? Or worst, he may be having an affair with someone else. Try confronting him about these issues to pinpoint the problem. If he continues to keep you in the dark over this, I suggest you deprive him of something he values in your relationship to hopefully make him aware of how deprived you feel.

Answer 5

Ask yourself---was your man like this before you married? If not---how long has it been since your man had a full physical with his DR. If he hasn't had himself checked out he needs to. He may have a prostate problem that is causing his low limbido! have a PSA blood test done while he's there.

If everything checks out ok at the DR. then you need to move onto couples counseling. If he won't go to that then you really need to weigh your options: SEXLESS marriage with no intimacy----or having an affair, or petitioning the courts for a dissolution to your marriage--

Your man needs to be given an ultimatum---and do it soon!! You say you love this man----then you need to show your love for him by getting him to the DR ......and counseling-----

Answer 6

Dear I think you have been patient with your man long enough. You have obviously envested more of yourself in this marriage than he has, now it is time to move on. Find someone who can give himself completely to the marriage . Your husband could possibly be playing for the other team if you know what I mean. There is definately something wrong. Say goodbye and good ridance.

Answer 7

Putting aside any medical condition ,
The both of you should sit down with a blank sheet of paper
not at the same time, and write down what you like about the partners sexual technique and what you don't like about it, and on a separate line what you would like your husband to do when your having sex.This will open up a fruitful and could lead to both of you talking more about your fantasy's and how to make sex a rewarding experience for both of you

Answer 8

The Bible cleary tells husbands and wives the following as a command, in Ephesians: Men are commanded to love their wives and wives arecommanded to respect their husbands. If a woman shows no respect to her husband she will not get love and if a man shows no love he gets no respect, however if we are commanded to love the wife and the wife to RESPECT the husband, then it follows each will get their rewards. THese two ingredients are whats lacking in our world today and one realises why God gives that instruction. he doesnt tell men to EARN respect from the wives and wives to EARN love from the husbands, he merely commands us to love and respect one another, and if we choose not to do either then the crazy and unpleasant cycle follows. THis is a choice thing for both of you. My advise is to read the book mentioned at the end and also to try and understand where men come from and for your husband to make the effort to understand where you operate from. This book gives you all the answers and every one of the people I have given this book to have come back with extremely good reports. Please make the effort if you want this relationship to work.

I hope that you will not take this lightly as it matters that you both have a healthy and successful marriage and that is my greatest wish for you.

Answer 9

My best and simplest advice is for both of you to see a sex therapist and get to work on the problem/s. He or she will also be able to give you some great techniques on how you can rekindle your sex life when things get routine. I know you want to feel desired again and feel the heat of that passion, but cheating is not the answer. If passion was ever present in your life with your husband, you can get it back again..if you both work at it.

Answer 10

y suddenly he lost interest. is there any specific reasons or does he was like this even at the time of marriage. try to talk to him. if he doent open up then better go for professional help.
may be u should try some things in sex.try to do roleplaying or change positions.

Answer 11

So maybe you should be greatful for the things he is good at. there is so much more to a marriage than sex. think of all those unhappy marriages only held together by sex.but greatful your husband is worth more than that. tell him you Love him for who he is.