She had dated him at one point. Now me and him have been dating for almost 3 years and she said she was fine with it...When he asked me to marry him she told me if i did she wouldn't come. When i asked why she said she still loved him. Im stuck in the middle now...I love him to death and he's the only one i want but she's been my best friend since i was 2 Im 18 now. What do i do??? Thanks so much for any thing you have to say..good or bad...
2007-01-04 18:38:59 · 7 answers · asked by ♥Kay♥ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
This is tough spot to be in and unfortunately every woman is in this situation at one time or another maybe not to the degree you are but in some way. The best advice I can give you is if you're truly in love with this man and want to spend the rest of your life with him as much as her friendship means to you, you have to put yourself be first. What I mean to say is why martyr yourself by putting her first and being miserable yourself. If she were to ask you to leave him so she could have him would you? A true friend wouldn't have given you this kind of ultimatum she would want you to be happy and loved.
In this life especially at the age you are we may find ourselves taking different paths than our friends and it looks to me like you two are going to go seperate ways on this even if you don't marry him because you will resent her for having put u in this situation and feel guilty if you married him and she's sad. But again if she were a true friend she wouldn't ask you to walk away from someone you love.
I hope this helped you and things work out in a way you can live with them.
2007-01-04 18:48:57 · answer #1 · answered by Stephanie D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is precisely why it is never a good idea to date friend's boyfriends-ever, even if they are no longer together and you have permission from the friend. There are always feelings involved... I will disagree with what seems to be justification for your friend's expected reaction of selfishness. Why is it always about looking out for yourself in this world? Isn't that the problem here? Always putting your needs before those of others, even friends and family? If you do decide to chuck the friend in favor of the man, and the relationship/marriage fails, you will not only have lost a friend, but the man of your life as well.
2007-01-05 03:04:49 · answer #2 · answered by nunya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a real friend wouldn't stand in the way of ur happiness no matter what the situation. Besides she gave u her blessing three yrs ago. I personally say get married because if u don't u may be passing on a good thing and ur going despise ur friend anyway. Do what makes u happy.
2007-01-05 02:46:37 · answer #3 · answered by curiouslover 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she was your real best friend, she would not be jealous and she would support you. She is looking out for her and not you. She is living in a fantasy world if the man wants to marry you and she thinks she still has a chance.
2007-01-05 02:43:51 · answer #4 · answered by millerman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow that is a doozy, maybe she loves him because she see's what kind of guy he really has become being with you and she is a little jealous. I wish you all the best.............
2007-01-05 02:43:04 · answer #5 · answered by whattheheck 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try a threesome and see what works out best. Winner takes all!!
2007-01-05 02:44:30 · answer #6 · answered by fatsausage 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you arent going to get married and if you do it wont last. i say dont worry about it. you are too young
2007-01-05 02:43:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋